Long running sticky thread request

bump

Bloody fantastic idea. So many different perspectives already on MN, and so much support.

All in all I think this could work

I think this is a great idea.

me tooooo

Great idea! Count me in

bump (before it disappears off my Threads I'm On)

Great idea!

Sounds like it could be v useful

What a great idea. Please add my name.

Lovely idea . Well done you!

I think this is an execellent idea.

most people are good eggs - don't let the few who have their own agenda stop something as positive as this.

I would definitely like to add my support.

could any of the concerns be addressed if the meeting was between 3 MNers rather than 2? that would give backup to the "befriender" incase it got too deep, and some extra protection to the "befriended" incase the befriender was an axe murderer lookign for a victim who wouldn't be noticed missing....

I would love to add my name.
What a wonderful idea.

But that doesn't help really. If I tell DH I'm off into town to meet X at Starbuck's he'll call/come and look for me if I don't come back within a reasonable time. He'll call the hospitals and my parents. MNHQ are unliekly to do that. And I agree MNers meet up all the time, I just think this will attract a certain type of person.
That said, I think there's a temptation to only see the risks in such a suggestion. I would guess the risks are still tiny, and it's worthwhile.

Fair enough. It's not a big issue, I'm trying to give some perspective and point out - helpfully I thought - some areas that would have to be considered before it went ahead. This is an open discussion forum, right?

But it's the semi aggressive tone of garlicbutter that makes me back off. If you can't see why this might a bad idea and even acknowledge the potential for it to go wrong then that's pretty narrow
minded... And you're hoping to befriend people and be supportive, but the minute your advice is questioned you get shirty?!?!!!

And we do take these risks when we make friends, but from what you are describing there is an inbuilt unbalance in the relationship from the start.

I dont really look at the relationships bit; again too much of peoples own bias come into what they are saying and too much "leave the bastard".

I do think this is a good idea but I have one particular concern. The rules of internet dating are let someone know where you're going etc, but the point of this is that people who have no one else can use it...

I'm failing to understand why this is a big issue to you, Wips.

If it works out wrong, it works out wrong. But we won't know just how right it may be, if we don't try, will we?

Was "twat radar" the part of my post you didn't understand? If so, that would suggest you don't spend much time in Relationships - which would also explain why you didn't understand my faith in the supportive nerve centre that is Mumsnet :)

Not neceassarily. You "know" a handful of posters on here, you only "know" what they tell you about themselves which may or may not be true. You simply cannot generalize and say " they post on mumsnet they must be nice" or safe to meet.

Say I post asking for advice and someone local agrees to meet, I then spill my guts to them as I am at rick bottom and totally alone. The next day I see them in my Childs playground. We turn out to gave kids at the same school. I am not totally reliant on thus person to keep what I have told them confidential, and may feel worse that I've ended up in that situation.

Or I see avpidt from someone in trouble, agree to meet them. Give then my mobile number to arrange to meet. When we meet untapped what they posted was the tip of the iceberg, they appear to havenmentsl health problems, they ask me for money, only £5 - what do I do?

Like I said, befriending organizations and listening organizations have training, policies and guidelines to protect everyone involved. I don't want to rain on your parade,but just because someone posts on an anonymous Internet forum it does not make them qualified to help. It would be great if we could trust people but it only needs to go wrong once for people to get hurt and mumsnets reputation to be damaged.

I'm sorry, I don't understand what you mean?

ah, but Wips, if weird shit started to happen they would POST ON MUMSNET about it, wouldn't they? A thousand finely-tuned twat radars at your service!

No one of us is in a vacuum.

I agree that trolls looking to meet someone may not use this; but even the most well intentioned mumsnetter could be giving someone in a one-to-one situation totally duff advice/support. As the poster above said when you are down its the worst time to find a frien, but it van also make you vulnerable and easily manipulated. Or may find themselves drawn into a complex situation that becomes very difficult to extract

Like I said I think if the local boards were better used/rethought then that would be a better starting point.