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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Are Mumsnet rules just for the little people?

913 replies

Penandink · 12/02/2012 14:54

"Troll cries make MNers look silly. If you think the person is not real, you don't have to post - nobody has a gun at your head! If you suspect the person is false and trying to hurt, or get money, tell MNHQ! How terrible if genuine people - people in trouble, people at the end of their tether - come here as their last hope for some help and advice, are savaged and go off again, feeling terrible and that they don't have anywhere left to turn to?"

www.mumsnet.com/info/netiquette

There is a very real problem on Mumsnet that there are a small group of posters who wilfully ignore this "rule" as and when it suits them. I think the problem is now institutionalised in MN as being the norm and acceptable.

These people just make stuff up about people they've never met. Once they do this other people pile in believing the bullshit, and then acting on it. The troll-hunters also don't seem to stop and think how their assumptions might affect - or even damage the rest of the site. Lets summarise their position: " I am OUTRAGED and APPALLED by something that may or may not have happened but can't be proved, because although I say it did, I won't provide any evidence"

Sometimes this place is more like a bear pit rather than a community of support and OBJECTIVE thinking and response.

They have their bit of fun and when their target gives up - off course they do having been hounded unmercifully - the Hunter claim that proves they were a troll. Disagree with the unters and sooner rather than later they will accuse you of being a man (their ultimate insult) or a troll. A suggestion that you should leave the site usually follows.

The "silent majority" don't put up with this. They just leave...

OP posts:
Maryz · 13/02/2012 15:55

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thepileofstuff · 13/02/2012 15:54

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usualsuspect · 13/02/2012 15:54

No not you ,SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 13/02/2012 15:54

Usualsuspect - are you suggesting I am a sock puppet?

thepileofstuff · 13/02/2012 15:53

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shabbapinkfrog · 13/02/2012 15:50

Maryz your posts are 'spot on.'

shabbapinkfrog · 13/02/2012 15:47

We always welcome new bereaved Mums to our thread with open arms. Every now and then I feel suspicion about them....that is the only way I can describe it. BUT until someone is proved to be false I would always give them help and a listening ear.

everlong · 13/02/2012 15:46

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Maryz · 13/02/2012 15:45

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thepileofstuff · 13/02/2012 15:44

If you start encouraging troll hunting on bereavement threads, it will be a very unsafe place for newbies who have been bereaved.

Maryz · 13/02/2012 15:44

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everlong · 13/02/2012 15:44

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Maryz · 13/02/2012 15:43

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shabbapinkfrog · 13/02/2012 15:43

I think that if someone suspects a troll - especially on such emotional threads as ours they should contact MNHQ as soon as poss. The incident I mentioned in my post got to the point that the 'troll' on New Years Eve messaged me on another networking site and said (for all to see) 'I need your support tonight...I cannot stop thinking about my child...you are the only person who can help me. IF you go out tonight I warn you that I will take my own life.' Shock I ended up telling her I was going out and wouldn't be held to ransom by her.

When I came onto MN the day after another lady who had been drawn in by the troll had started a thread desperatly trying to find me so I could go and talk to this troll.......and, yes, she was pretending to be a bereaved Mum.

frasersmummy · 13/02/2012 15:42

I am not sure about encouraging people to shout troll on the bereavment board shabs...

Its a realy difficult one as I know you and a couple of others were badly stung by that troll but that thread has been a safe haven for 5 years now.. cant believe its been that long ..

we both know how hard it is to talk about losing your child in the real world and we really dont want mums put off for fear of not being believed

Maryz · 13/02/2012 15:42

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usualsuspect · 13/02/2012 15:37

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QueenOfFeckingEverything · 13/02/2012 15:36

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usualsuspect · 13/02/2012 15:35

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SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 13/02/2012 15:33

Penandink - are you a regular who has namechanged (which would explain your familiarity with the site).

And if, as you do really believe that ".....the percentage of genuine messages in most of the site sections is close to zero....." - then why does any of it matter anyway? If it is all fiction, why do trolling/troll hunting matter or do any damage?

I wonder if you are going to answer my questions (which others have already asked and you have ignored) or are you going to post another generic post about mumsnet's rules, the harm that trolling does to the site etc etc?

thepileofstuff · 13/02/2012 15:33

So Shabbapinkfrog, you are saying that troll hunting is a good thing, and you would like to see more of it?

usualsuspect · 13/02/2012 15:30

Penandink , we get your point

shabbapinkfrog · 13/02/2012 15:30

penandink - I believe, personally, that the bereaved Mums thread (of which I am sadly a part of) has been hit harder by Trolls than any other thread on MN. We have had at least half a dozen of them over the last 2 years. When they come onto our thread and tell there story everybody replies to them and supports them. Sometimes over the weeks i start to get an uneasy feeling and if I think its someone trolling I private message MNHQ. Not once has any of us shouted 'troll' on our thread.

It is very difficult to describe how everyone feels on our thread when a troll causes damage and upset.

A couple of years ago around Christmas time we were all 'taken in' by someone who I believe was mentally ill - surely you have to be mentally ill to pretend your child has died? I wish, with all my heart, one of the 'troll alerters' you talk about in your post had jumped all over our thread shouting 'troll, troll she is a troll.' The damage the poster caused was sickening and so very sad.

LilacWaltz · 13/02/2012 15:30

noddy I thought they were dc!!

noddyholder · 13/02/2012 15:26

Who are the little people

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