Let's talk about sex toys (well, ads for them on Mumsnet), please

It was very funny when you said howls, brain, beacuse I had just posted a picture of a vixen mask

Under their "philosophy" they say:

The Coco de Mer seed germinates from both a male and female plant. Whereas the seed so closely resembles the female form, the male plant has a stamen, which looks strangely like a penis. A huge penis at that, and one that smells of sticky sweet honey.

nom nom

haha at competitive horror.

We are like a bunch of errant schoolgirls sometimes

HA ha not really.....as I said I'm not even sure what you're talking about, I can't look at any of this stuff as I'm at work.... I'm just literally PSML at your educational findings (massively helped by my imagination)

If it was something like Coco de Mer run by Sam Roddick (run by women primarily for women's pleasure) then surely that would have a place but anything else might be dodgy....

sexy

Oh MNHQ - look what you've started....

you know we love a bit of competitive horror

Hmmm, started off thinking, who cares? Then I read a lot of the posts and decided I agree with many of them and therfore evidentally I do care, in a no to the ad's kind of way. Although it's more than my job is worth to go clicking on any of the links from this particular computer!

dear me

"Urge your lover to push the boundaries with Coco de Mer's virginal white linen blindfold. 'Love Until it Hurts' is painstakingly spelled out in blood red cross stitching. You'll never look back..."

Yuk.

Serioudly have to delete history now.

Are you getting into character Brain?

Actually, not at that price. I'll make my own out of toilet roll and sticky back plastic like the good old days.

No thanks Helen. As other posters have pointed out, I am on MN in the day often when the children are about.

foxy lady

I think I'm going to get one and wear it to the park. Just to see.

I actually am shocked SHOCKED I TELL YOU. I didn't know shops outside amsterdam sold this kind of stuff.

SGB is going to come on and call me mundane in a minute. I have got a horrible feeling she is right

This sounds dodgier and dodgier bloody hell!

"Serving Suggestion: Put this on for dog-style loving. Get on all fours and crawl into submission? Position the ears for more of a submissive look, or prick the ears to attention."

ROFL at Hullys revelations

I don't dare look at the sites (chicken)

' Position the ears for more of a submissive look, or prick the ears to attention.'

I was right. For emotionally repressed men whose girlfriends have discovered the only way to communicate with them is to speak dog.

Elderberry - how is that a turn on? Really? Apart from bestiality when surely you'd want the real thing?

What an odd hen night, reading wallpaper. Don't they wear garters and lie in the gutter any more?

The strangest thing in Coco de Mer is this for £350.

What's that all about then? Is it a common fetish of the very rich, due to their repressed upbringings in loveless country houses where the only being to whom they are permitted to show affection is their labrador?

That is the kind of thing you would buy a pretentious knob who reads *wallpaper magazine for her hen night.

Nope.

I'm not a prude (but as, from a convo I had a few months back with SIL I appear to be the only woman in Essex who doesn't own a vibrator, maybe I'm a wee bit backward), but I really don't want it anywhere on MN.

BIWI, I too am still a bit at the Anne Summers shops being on the high street. Ee, I remember when you had to go into Soho if you wanted to be confronted with that sort of stuff...

What about the glass zigzag, getorf? I've worked out how you use it, you have to use the 6.5 inch speculum first. Silly me.