Let's talk about sex toys (well, ads for them on Mumsnet), please

HERE YOU GO PERA6URA

If there were a company who exclusively sold 'sex toys' for women which could in no way be construed as degrading, offensive or mysogynistic, then I wouldn't have a problem with them being advertised on here.

You'll never find one though

:o MmeL. Sorry, Friday night, and all that

On a serious note, agree with Per Adua.

And as to the comment that MN is a business - no one is saying that we should refuse all ads.

Just those from companies that sell items that are degrading to women.

I have actually noticed that the ads on MN have been getting better, cleverer. I saw one recently that used MN slang, and thought it was very good.

And I agree with WMMC. Lets have some ads for stuff other than Boden and mummsy stuff.

There must be loads of companies who would fit better to MN.

what swallowed a fly said

Christina! I will be contacting my lawyers to instruct them to sue MN's arse for that slanderous post.

on a stupid stupid tablet and can't link, but anyone who thinks casual sexification of cjlture isn't a problem should look at aibu to think this is incitement to rape...

I've heard MmeL has a bit of a crush there, BOF

Doesnt bother me, I think its best that the ads dont picture anything that may offend the delicate types [or the feminists] fair enough....and yes dont particularly need my 12 yr old seeing a rabbit dildo on the screen.

But we are all adults and have the choice to click on a link or not. I never click a link to Boden or The white house 'cos they are not my thing.

Coco de mer and Myla are over priced shite for people that think buying from them makes their smut more classy, Lovehoney is fine by me but then I am a customer tester and reviewer with them anyway.

I expect from the general consensus on this thread that it will be a no no anyway though.

Whatever

I certainly don't object to the use of sex toys between consenting adults.

I object most vigorously to degrading products, porn, costumes etc being advertised on MN. This is and should continue to be a woman-friendly space.

You find a shop which sells sex toys etc advertised in a way which is not demeaning, does not promote body fascism, does not normalise the idea of woman's sexuality as subordinate to male sexuality & desire - brilliant. Advertise away. I'd love to find an online shop like that myself.

I suspect we all draw the line in different places. What this and the other thread has demonstrated, I think, is that the majority of MNers are NOT happy for you to identify us with retailers like LoveHoney.

Those that find being tied up in a straitjacket and having a smear test erotic - feel free. Just not in my prudish, feminist face please.

As much as I don't really like some of the stuff mentioned (speculum, ew) I think that advertising is needed by MN as it's obviously a commercial concern. With the language that's regularly used and defended on here, and the regular sex threads I think it's almost a bit rich for some posters to have an issue with sex toy ads.

Did you really have to bring Shiny Dave into this thread, MmeL?

I am with Hully and BIWI et al

Nothing against sex toys as such (not clicking on any links as I am on DD's netbook) but the kind of websites that we are talking about is not the kind of thing I want to see out of the corner of my eye when chatting about recipes or discussing David Cameron's policies.

It surprises me, tbh, that MNHQ actually thought that this would be a go-er.

What Hully said.

And do you know what? I'd be so much happier if we just were honest and called them sex-aids, not toys. 'Toys' normalises it - butt-plugs, speculums and all - sex-'aids' makes it clear that only an inadequate freak would need to put a woman in a strait-jacket to get his rocks off.

So no. Thank you.

personally i'd rather mcD's and formula than the sex industry any day.

keeping it really simple:

lots of your members have already been massively offended by seeing sexshop ads on here and have expressed this.

why would you want to have sexshop ads on here if you KNOW that it will offend and/or upset a significant percentage of members?

isn't it enough to hear that many don't want it?

it wouldn't be POSHNET then would it pmsl

is it still demeaning to women if they want to have the toys/etc used on them (or wear them or whatever) there are plenty of women on the S&M scene for example and they certainly aren't all subjugated and demeaned!

at whomovedmychocolate hello Kitty vibrators WTF

What ethically it's okay to have advertising for a sex toy website but not McDonalds

What cloudsandwind and uppity are both saying. And I speak as someone who is really non vanilla about these thngs.

Exactly Teaspoons, if it linked to porn which we 100% knew was ethically sourced and involved women (and men) who were there of their own free will and had other choices to make a living and didn't leave the industry with PTSD (as almost 70% of women in porn do) and showed sex as a participatory activity between people, not something men do (violently and with hate) to women, I wouldn't have a problem with it as long as it was in suitable sections (ie prob not right for sections where you might be inclined to click on if there were DC's around -chickenfanciers frinstance).

Otherwise, it just looks as if MNHQ supports and endorses the rampant abuse and hatred of women that is the norm in the mainstream porn industry. Why would they want to do that?

Snigger

Noooooo! It had to happen eventually