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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Very nervous to TTC after a miscarriage but am going for it

537 replies

Bella23 · 20/01/2005 09:19

For those who want to look to the future and TTC again I would really like some support, advice etc.
I thought we needed a new thread with positive energy (yes have turned into chanting hippy) so that we feel we are moving forward rather than dwelling on what has already passed.
The only thing I can concentrate on at the moment is that next Wed is the day that me and DH can start trying again (this will be 2 weeks after ERPC).
Anyone else ready to try again?

OP posts:
romilly · 13/02/2005 20:47

welcome to the thread lilolme and sorry to hear you have had such a tough time. i'm afraid i have had no experience with endometriosis so can't offer any advice - but you could (if you haven't already) do a search on archived messages (see top of page). Or post a brand new thread titled endometriosis advice please! maybe quiet tonight but hang in there i'm sure you will get response. good luck.

dqueen, wish i had more time to chat - but gotta go and do d/h supper! thanks for your babydust. my weekend of bd'ing didnt go as smoothly as planned - after humungous row with d/h who is freaked out about being told when i'm ovulating. i can understand it doesnt seem 'very loving' as he put it - being expected to perform - but i don't think any one of us wants it to be so unspontaneous its just that the timing is so bloody all important - dammit!
anyway - we've kissed and made up, thank god. he bought me flowers (and we did manage one more bd - tho probably out of peak time !) i have to admit i didnt help the whole situation by being stroppy and stressed out and then said - right, lets go - i'm ovulating. whoops.

hi hereshoping - nice to have you back.
hi yingers - havent got the yoga thing yet. too busy ttc'ing!

mishi1977 · 13/02/2005 21:30

hi all

DQ she does know i had mc etc but shes obviously wrapped up in her own pg..hey ho its the way it goes...as for bding i am planning at least every other but prefer every day..not using opks etc yet as thats too obsessive for me personally...lol but who knows if ive not caught on in a couple of months..lol

lilolme
welcome to thread hun and huge hugs for the trip...

romilly sorry ur weekend didnt go to plan..arent men funny things...DH knows i am more 'passionate' cos of wanting to get pg again and he seems to be all for it but then we shall see how the month continues..lol

take care all
mishi

yingers74 · 13/02/2005 21:35

Mishi - sorry to hear about that, I understand though, I avoid certain threads as although I am happy for pregnant woman it can be hard even though I feel ok. I have a friend who is pregnant and we were both really excited at being pregnant at the same time as our dds are good friends, she is very tactful but I do often think 'if only...'

lil - can't help I'm afraid but I wish you lots of luck, and am sending some baby dust your way

dq - unfortunately dh does not feel that every spare moment is a chance for mischief! What a party pooper!

dramaqueen72 · 13/02/2005 23:33

lilolme -sorry no experience of coil, or endometriosis either, but wishing you much luck in ttc. hope you start another thread and get some advice re the coil etc, but v welcome to join us in obsessing for ttc!!!
mishi, sorry shes not thinking about you, i guess its hard when pg to remember everyone, i hope we dont put our feet in it when we're the pg ones. cause we will also be blooming happy opks are the least obsessive for me! as monitors etc requier you to do things the same time each day.....and i am so not organised enough for that! may have to be in a couple of months if it doesnt happen tho. willing to do whatever. so give opks a go next time maybe. we can obsess about dark lines versus lighter lines all day together!
romilliy -how funny, dh and i always fall out exactly around perfect O time. i think they second guess us anyhow. even if you DID sound abit tactless thereLOL!and that slightly late O time sounds just right for a baby girl i think! FINGERS CROSSED for you. big time. hmmmmmmm, are you coming up to the 2 week wait then? ah now theres a time i am certian to loose it....2ww between bding and testing time drives me loopy!!!! its a loooooooooong time......oh, sorry i'm prob not helping am i?
dh keen to bd today, even said 'come on i thought we were trying to make a baby......' nearly told him it was past peak time, but thought thats maybe NOT tactful to say 'needed you last week.......but not now' to him!!! never mind, at least hes keen to get pg. LOL
heres to our busy mondays, short half terms (please) and short 2ww!!
((hugs))

hereshoping · 14/02/2005 10:49

Happy valentines all!
nil from dh but big spontaneous kiss and happy valentines day from ds1 who is 8 next week. more than made up for it!
off to Ireland tonight on overnight boat so wont be logging in for few days - dq see you are too busy for mn this am! my three are dancing around to disney cd at present
ive used mirena - took 4 weeks before af before removal, dont know much about endometriosis though
happy 1/2 term all - back at weekend

dramaqueen72 · 14/02/2005 10:53

as IF i'd be too busy for you lot!
have a very good trip to Ireland, deeeply envious here. may all your valentines be fabulous ones ladies. my (card) was decidedly average, but hey he tried totally non romantic gifts -photography things- but again he did get me somethng. not quite a trip to amsterdam but!!!! he took me to seville once and paris as a surprise each time, so will have to live thro memories i think!LOL

Original poster
Bella23 · 14/02/2005 11:54

Just popping in to say Hi ladies. Will have a proper read later but for noe, news frome me:
AF arrived yetserday so 4 days later than normal cycle so quite pleased actually as now am going to concentrate for nect month. Thought i would be gutted but wasn't , felt relieved that everything was working. Had fab time in Amsterdam, was a bit spoilt by coming home to a letter from the midwives organising my first appointment with them - why can't the system be better!! A bit sad - but hey - body is back in business so once this week is over, will be full steam ahead. Had great chats with DH over the weekend and we are a "team" over this so will crack it!!
Happy Vanetines! Have just read that Hester (who's story i have followed for ages) has some good news - this is great!! Feel hopeful for us now that it has finally happened for her against some pretty sharp odds - ye ha !

OP posts:
romilly · 14/02/2005 13:54

just giggling at dramaqueens comment about "decidedly average" card - i really think guys find it difficult doing romance to order - much like ttc'ing i guess ! anyway dqueen it sounds like he's trying and that's the main thing. sorry hereshoping to hear that yours didnt even muster a card up yet, maybe later?!
well, as you all heard my weekend was a bit of a flop (!) but we somehow resurrected what was left of it and it all turned out ok in the end. I even got some gorgeous flowers and a cute card today. .

mishi - you are probably right, its not good to get too obsessive - but having said that, if needs must! i was a bit horrified by all this stuff before i had an m/c - i was the polar opposite - too chilled about it all. now i know its not so easy - plus other factors like my age (38) - d/h sperm count not great etc.etc. i honestly feel i have to make an effort now, or it may be too late. i know too many older women who made the career choice only to have regrets later on. including arch-feminists, like germaine greer.

bella - love amsterdam. lucky you. thrilled to hear AF arrived.

romilly · 14/02/2005 13:54

p.s. FAB news about hester

munnzieb · 14/02/2005 13:56

just to let you all know, Hester's had her BFP only 4 months after M/C.. so there's hope for us all yet!

romilly · 14/02/2005 13:58

thank you munzieb - please pass on to hester how thrilled we are for her.

yingers74 · 14/02/2005 20:28

Congrats to hester, and it does give the rest of us more hope.

Bella - glad to hear about your AF, can't wait for mine to arrive and also not arrive but without it, ttcing is a bit of a stab in the dark

yingers74 · 14/02/2005 20:29

Oh and happy valentines, me and dh are going to celebrate it on friday while dd is at nursery, she doesn't like it if we cuddle and kiss and not include her!

Original poster
Bella23 · 15/02/2005 09:02

Morning all
Well hope you all had a bit of spoiling from your other halves yesterday.
Have decided to be on major health kick this month, have bought myself the Davina exercise dvd so am going to give that a twirl as think getting my heart rate up must be good for the body and ttc.
Midwife people phoned me back yesterday and apologised for the mix up and told me to keep taking folic acid etc which was nice, felt very positive and stopped me from feeling pissed off that they had sent me the letter.
DQ - you are testing if no AF by 20th?
Mishi - totally understand on the pregnant friend front - my best friend has her 12 week scan on Thursday so I know I will find it hard as obviously I am pleased for her but at the same time feel totally unfairly done to that it is not me! These things just come to test us don't they - Mishi - our time will come
Well onwards and upwards for me this month, just looking forward to AF going away and then will be bding for England. DH is prepped - even put dates in palm for when he is required bless him - so know he is taking this seriously as well.
Hope you all have a good day

OP posts:
dramaqueen72 · 15/02/2005 10:13

bella, much giggling here over you dh putting dates in palm......just picturing its alarm ringing and him dashing home sorry....just made me smile....
sounds like youre really positive right now, congrats i'm not that yet, feeling abit 'fat' fed up and so very much pre AF. still if shes hanging about then the sooner i can get her and feel like you but inanser to your questioin yes, am testing 20th if no af. then again the following week etc etc, if af stays away. have no idea what i'll do if i AM pg. suspect may have to wrestle with several medical types who dislike having no af to date it by. ah well!! means plenty of scans, which in turn means plenty or reassurance doesnt it?. anyhow most unlikey, took me three cycles last time, suspect similar time scale this time.
well off to walk doggy long way today, as have to wear out three kids as well as dog this time....
have a good day ladies
p.s. Girl -hope alls well at your mothers, we miss you.

mishi1977 · 15/02/2005 14:20

HI all

well some semi good news...my CPN is pg only 8wks butits good as she had a missed mc in nov so has caught on in second month...she was using opks and got green light in dec so now due in sept..bless her..good news as it gives hope..lol I have just told dh who said its great cos it means we should be pg by june deffo..silly i know but i want to be pg for when pip would have been due
Not much else happening here...so far have bd every day although should be ov around the weekend so have been getting in practice..u never know
Hope ur all having good day and for those on hols soooooooooooo jealous

Original poster
Bella23 · 15/02/2005 14:41

Mishi - agree all these stories give me great hope that we will all get our BFP in the near future!!
Am at work if it helps with the jealous feelings!

OP posts:
yingers74 · 15/02/2005 20:24

Bella - let me know about davina, i gave up on my yogalates dvd, it was just too slow and boring, so have got a yoga dvd which I used to have on video, which is pretty good and the woman on it comes across as pretty supportive! Just need to keep up with it.

yes i like to hear positive stories too, hopefully it will not be too long before we can have our own positive stories.

bonkerz · 15/02/2005 20:35

OK want to take a positive step after mc so here i am. Although DH and i are not going to be deliberately ttc we are not taking precautions so if it happens great, if not then fine.

Not had af yet after erpc so not sure if ovulated etc.... May take weeks before af appears but will join you girls anyway!

yingers74 · 15/02/2005 20:45

welcome bonkerz!

dramaqueen72 · 15/02/2005 21:12

hey hello over here, bonkerz. that O just might have already happened.....and spending some time 'not trying but not NOT tyring' is prob the best way to start
positive stories are very nice to hear, hopefully all such stories will have our name in it soon.

romilly · 15/02/2005 21:25

yes welcome to the nervous but positive club bonkerz

glad i didnt get the yogalates yingers now you say its crap!

so did everyone have a romantic time yesterday??!! my d/h is on a work trip which is why i was one of the few saddos hanging out on mumsnet last nite (heehee).

technical question here for anyone who might be able to help - is it quite normal to get two 0 days on persona? i had a OPK+ on first day which matched persona - but didnt bother doing OPK next day - when persona came up with 0 again. kind of annoying me now because it makes a big difference in terms of when i bd'd and i really can't be sure which day was 0 day. oh jesus, listen to me... i should just wait two weeks and see - ugh.

mishi1977 · 15/02/2005 22:31

hi all
bonkerz welcome
yingers i am thinking about yogalates but then i need something slow as its over 2 yrs since ive exercised and even then it wasnt much as i got pg with ds..lol

hope u have all had a good day
take care
mishi p.s does anyone know which ov kits it is that u get smiley faces with?

romilly · 15/02/2005 22:33

yup - its Clearblue digital

romilly · 15/02/2005 22:43

hey mishi - thought you said OPKS were too obsessive for you? have we successfully converted you into a fully-fledged ttc nutter?!!!!

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