Reasons not to share your baby name in advance

31 replies

BakersKitchen · 31/08/2026 10:00

Can we have a thread where we list all the reasons why it’s best to keep your baby name to yourself until they are born? Seems like almost every day someone regrets having sharing.

My FIL is a bit weird about the fact we don’t tel him our baby girl’s name even though it’s decided with a middle name. We’re standing firm but I was wondering if it would be helpful to people who are reluctant but considering sharing their name to know all the reasons why it can be a bad idea.

I’ll start: You decide you want to change it later on but feel uncomfortable because people already know the original name

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Butterflybluebell · 31/08/2026 19:01

People always have an opinion. The name won't always be liked. People always feel more ruthless in giving opinions before a baby is born.

FunnyOrca · 31/08/2026 20:42

My sister told me my nephew’s name before he was born and I honestly hate it and still do. If she had just presented the name and baby together, I wouldn’t have had the first response be associations rather than him and I wouldn’t have had months of think, “what is she thinking?!” And being careful not to put my foot in my mouth!

I didn’t have a name before giving birth, just a list and then took a few days to find the best fit. Middle names are more set in advance for me.

GirlsHoliday · 01/09/2026 18:52

I do find it quite interesting when people say that they don't want to share before birth because they're expecting that they'll receive criticism or negative comments. If you're even too afraid to share the name or feel some level of embarrassment about it then how do you expect your child to go through life with that name and have to introduce themselves as that name? Are you not worried that they'll also feel some level of embarrassment/awkwardness about their name? Just a different perspective.

I'm aware that some perfectly standard normal names receive criticism from friends and family, but I'm referring to situations where the parents don't want to share the name because they're well aware of how questionable/bizarre of a name it is and how it's perceived by the majority of people.

NamingNoNames · 01/09/2026 19:54

@GirlsHoliday , if someone told me the baby was going to be Freya I might say 'It sounds like frayed - like threadbare or worn' or something. The name is ok though and Freya isn't questionable.

XMissPlacedX · 01/09/2026 22:00

TheOnlyWayIsIlford · 31/08/2026 10:49

There was a MN poster whose Mum got a tattoo of the expected baby’s name as a ‘surprise’ - only to discover that they had changed their mind and named the baby something else. The Mum was insistent that they revert to tattoo name 🤣

I remember that thread

Mamma2828384 · 01/09/2026 22:04

I have great respect for my MIL who is normally very diplomatic. When I was pregnant we told her our baby name, which was a very normal name and one we had actually settled on years before, and she said “hmmm…give it some more thought”! I was crushed but we still loved it and used it! It doesn’t have to even be direct criticism, implied disapproval is bad too.

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