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AIBU?

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Original poster

To expect people ill with Covid stay home?

794 replies

LakelandHiker · 12/10/2026 18:09

This week, my manager and a friend who goes to my exercise class are ill with Covid. I don't know if they've tested, but they've both said they have it. However one is still coming into the office and the other still attending the exercise class. AIBU or overreacting here... but why don't they stay home until clear? Even if 'feeling 95% better' wouldn't you wait until potentially exposing others? I can't help but feel mad at them both for being so selfish. I often look after an elderly relative and can't risk passing Covid on to her as she is frail. I get life can't be on pause forever but my manager can get paid sick leave and my friend can miss a class, it isn't like there's anything at stake...

OP posts:
ExpectMore · 14/10/2026 12:48

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 11:18

Well firstly you would have a conversation and explain. Secondly its not EVERY time - its if you or they are ill. Or you could meet outside, make sure ventilation is suitable. Its about education - the more we normalise it the better. No one says it will be perfect EVERY time but doing nothing changes nothing. If you hospitalised a client due to your infection would you care? If a client asks you to mask would you?

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I suspect given everything she’s said she doesn’t and wouldn’t care. That’s what I find bewildering

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 12:51

@ExpectMore See replies! 😀

Greedybilly · 14/10/2026 12:52

@Tryonemoretime- I hear you a couple of days I've honestly thought - this is the day I die. But didn't ( obviously). Am taking pro/pre biotics on top of a billion other supplements. Glad u found something thst worked!

ExpectMore · 14/10/2026 12:53

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 12:38

@ExpectMore Well, as mummy who has lost, I imagine I feel this more keenly but...
I find it desperately sad (for both you and your children) that you have the absolute privilege of 6 weeks' off to spend time with your very young children, as well as home help so you "don't have to worry about life admin" but yet here you are, on MN for the second day in a row, frequently putting down those of us who work our arses off to make ends meet.
Would I want to be able to spend time with my babies? Absolutely.
Would I want to be you? Absolutely not.

I’m not putting you or anyone down. I’m objecting to your principles of putting £75 ahead of someone’s health and well being. That’s very different.

It’s you that’s stepping beyond a discussion on principles to personal attacks.

Delatron · 14/10/2026 12:57

Tryonemoretime · 14/10/2026 12:30

At one point, I was so ill with LC that I told my husband it was going to kill me. And I don't know if it helped the recovery, but I started to take a strong biotic called Your Gut Plus. No links to the company.

I have heard that healing the gut can help. I’m trying a probiotic but I’ve spent so much money on supplements!

Research shows sufferers of Long Covid/ME and CFS have a worse quality of life than cancer sufferers. Not something people should dismiss or take lightly.

My only hope is that with all these new sufferers of long Covid (many children) there will be more research in to these conditions.

Tryonemoretime · 14/10/2026 13:01

My daughter has ME. I had Long Covid. We're now part of the Rosetta Stone project. It's researching these conditions.

Pir · 14/10/2026 13:02

How about trying a
no
b?
no
c?
no
d?
no

etc etc etc.
There will always be an element of “yeah, I don’t care” from some people.

There will be an element of fear of peer pressure from others.

There will be those actively thwarted from doing what they know is the right thing and doing the right thing when they can.

There will be those actively thwarted from doing what they know is the right thing and then using that as a reason to do the wrong thing in situations where they do have power to do the right thing.

Given the number of people who have voted on this thread, it would be practically statistically impossible for some of them/their families to face the more severe end of what a covid infection does just from the current wave.

MNHQ
HopeMumsnet · 14/10/2026 13:28

Hi all,
Could we politely request that those on the thread who are engaging in a public spat rather than discussing the topic at hand consider giving it a rest? It would be much appreciated by your fellow MNers, if our inbox is anything to go by.
Thanks!

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 13:41

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Delatron · 14/10/2026 14:06

Tryonemoretime · 14/10/2026 13:01

My daughter has ME. I had Long Covid. We're now part of the Rosetta Stone project. It's researching these conditions.

I do think there is a genetic susceptibility too. So much research needed. I wish you and your daughter the best.

Simone123 · 14/10/2026 14:47

You're being reasonable. Unfortunately covid is still a potentially life threatening disease and the more we catch it the greater our risk of long covid. I can give at least 3 sources for this, but if anyone is in doubt you can put this into Google and see the list. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10633780/
As our government has down-played this, people don't believe they need to stay at home, test or be concerned about infecting others.
Glad you're exercising caution and thinking of those more vulnerable.

Risk of New-Onset Long COVID Following Reinfection With Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome Coronavirus 2: A Community-Based Cohort Study - PMC

Little is known about the risk of long COVID following reinfection with severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2). We estimated the likelihood of new-onset, self-reported long COVID after a second SARS-CoV-2 infection, compared to .....

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10633780/

Simone123 · 14/10/2026 15:01

likelysuspect · 12/10/2026 18:27

It is a cold its just one of millions of variants of it.

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Please please do look this up. It's never been defined as this. It can feel the same or similar in its symptoms for some people.

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 15:24

@mumatlast14 Issue 2: Safeguarding and Flight Risk. Another reason why "going outside" doesn't work.

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 15:25

@ExpectMore Thank you for being so empathetic as to acknowledge my loss. I appreciate it(!)

ruethewhirl · 14/10/2026 15:42

Greedybilly · 14/10/2026 12:19

@Tryonemoretimethat is so encouraging to hear because many days Long Covid feels like a death sentence.

P.s
The 2 people arguing on here are getting very tedious. Can uou pm each other or something? You've totally derailed the thread.
Just piss off and be very glad you don't have Long Covid!

Hear, hear.

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 15:43

@ruethewhirl Can they test for Long Covid? How would you know if you had it?

LuLightFest · 14/10/2026 16:11

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mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 16:23

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FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 16:27

@mumatlast14 You have zero understanding of the sort of YP I work with to even suggest "just going outside."

End ot conversation.

Delatron · 14/10/2026 16:29

Another thing Covid can do (which colds don’t) is wake up other viruses that have been laying dormant. Especially glandular fever and also Herpes. It really isn’t something you want to keep getting over and over again.

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 16:29

@LuLightFest They're called reborn dolls. Might be helpful?
Apologies - wrong thread.

mumatlast14 · 14/10/2026 16:56

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ruethewhirl · 14/10/2026 17:05

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 15:43

@ruethewhirl Can they test for Long Covid? How would you know if you had it?

I don't know if they can test, tbh. (But I haven't claimed to know, so not sure I understand why your question was directed at me?)

I don't think you'd know for sure if you had long Covid specifically, or whether it was something else, but from what I can gather it's not dissimilar to having fibromyalgia or ME, so you'd certainly know you had something. You'd just probably need the help of the medical profession to ascertain what it was.

FunPartyIdeas · 14/10/2026 17:09

@ruethewhirl Thank you. I wasn't sure if there was a test to rule out differential diagnoses?

ExpectMore · 14/10/2026 17:22

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Well said