I was friends with a woman for about 10 years. 5 years into our friendship she started dating a man who at first seem lovely but soon showed himself to be an abusive prick. He cheated on her, enjoyed making her look small and was physically abusive. They would split up and get back together regularly. Each time, I provided emotional support, she would sometimes stay at my house and say she was leaving for good but always went back. Eventually I became the enemy as her partner knew I didn’t like him and was supporting her to leave him. After having my own children, I said I could no longer support her as it was too hard and I needed to put my energy into my own family and making sure they were safe. She chose to stay with him.
Fast forward 6 years, she has now contacted me to say that she has left him for good. She has asked me for some financial help for a deposit on a house and other essentials for her children.
I haven’t replied yet. AIBU to just ignore her? I don’t want to get dragged into it all again. I can easily afford to give her money but I live a very settled life and don’t want to get involved. I’ve spoken to friends, it seems she has definitely left him for good and he has found himself another victim. As much as I feel for my friend, it affected my mental health years ago and I don’t want to go back.