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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

That it's a massive waste of time, effort, money, lives and we should just bring them over by coach and ferry.

257 replies

Ablondiebutagoody · 24/09/2026 16:03

I have just watched the video from earlier today/yesterday of a migrant boat departing Boulogne. The one where the Dad (presumably) ditches his toddler in the sea in order to get onto the boat. The kid was instantly picked up by French emergency workers and it struck me that this whole situation is completely bizarre.

There were approximately half a dozen lifeguards around the boat on jet skis and paddle boards, probably also a load of police out of frame. The boat will then be shadowed by French coastguard vessels until halfway across the channel, at which point border force/RNLI will pick them up and bring them to the UK. They will then be greated by coaches, a couple of hundred riot police and some (redacted by MNHQ) before continuing to their destination.

AIBU to think that this is all a total farce and we should simply provide the coaches from the outset?

YABU - The current arrangement is best.

YANBU - Coach and ferry would be better for everyone.

OP posts:
SmallDFartyCarNRG · 25/09/2026 13:59

EasternStandard · 25/09/2026 13:56

EU countries are dealing with similar. Hence some putting in restrictive policies.

At least they have money and a plan. We seem to be getting there but slowly.

Our main issue is greedy men starting wars in other countries and making people refugees and their own countries inhospitable. Then right wing people wang on about making women and kids take the trip, so then they wang on about it all being men... The men who matter don't give a monkeys and just want the land.

whymadam · 25/09/2026 14:01

Ihateboris · 24/09/2026 19:20

I have no idea what the answer is. But how desperate must these people be to attempt such a dangerous crossing on a small boat? I often wonder, what if the UK had a catastrophic event and we had to flee to another country? I'm not sure I'd have the bollocks to attempt such a journey, but what would be the alternative?

...and to be told NO when / IF you got to your destination!

pavillion1 · 25/09/2026 14:05

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

TheLiftedLash · 25/09/2026 14:12

I am really surprised that the EU has not centralised this migrant issue by arranging a central location where migrants are directed to e.g. perhaps setting up and paying a lower-income EU country to facilitate it. Any migrants who turn up in the UK etc. can be sent over there whilst being processed. Each EU country could pay into it.

Once there, the EU could decide where they are going and make sure all EU countries take their fair share. The UK could be part of this arrangement. After all, they are escaping war and danger right so they won't mind where they are sent. If they don't like it there, they can go back home.

LostThestral · 25/09/2026 14:26

OP - how do you know it was the toddler's Dad? Could be completely unrelated (although still awful)

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 15:00

LostThestral · 25/09/2026 14:26

OP - how do you know it was the toddler's Dad? Could be completely unrelated (although still awful)

I don't. That's why I said presumably.

But the AIBU was regarding the resources expended on shepherding these boats across the channel rather than the leaving of the child behind.

Do you think it would be better to provide coaches from France rather than the south coast of England? Thus avoiding all the dinghy palaver.

OP posts:
LostThestral · 25/09/2026 15:13

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 15:00

I don't. That's why I said presumably.

But the AIBU was regarding the resources expended on shepherding these boats across the channel rather than the leaving of the child behind.

Do you think it would be better to provide coaches from France rather than the south coast of England? Thus avoiding all the dinghy palaver.

no, I don't

moonraker0 · 25/09/2026 15:37

ElectoralControversy · 25/09/2026 13:19

You can't get on a plane without a visa.
Are you not aware of this? Carriers are heavily fined if they bring in anyone without permission to enter UK.

Yes I am very aware of this. If they are professionals as we are being led to believe upthread then they should have no problem obtaining the correct paperwork. I’m assuming this because I’d guess they would have to bring paperwork to prove their medical degree etc so I see no reason why they couldn’t get the paperwork to come here properly as many others do.

moonraker0 · 25/09/2026 15:39

TheLiftedLash · 25/09/2026 14:12

I am really surprised that the EU has not centralised this migrant issue by arranging a central location where migrants are directed to e.g. perhaps setting up and paying a lower-income EU country to facilitate it. Any migrants who turn up in the UK etc. can be sent over there whilst being processed. Each EU country could pay into it.

Once there, the EU could decide where they are going and make sure all EU countries take their fair share. The UK could be part of this arrangement. After all, they are escaping war and danger right so they won't mind where they are sent. If they don't like it there, they can go back home.

Why should one country be overrun with immigrants just because they pay less into the EU? Another case of yes we want them but not near us.

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 15:39

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 15:00

I don't. That's why I said presumably.

But the AIBU was regarding the resources expended on shepherding these boats across the channel rather than the leaving of the child behind.

Do you think it would be better to provide coaches from France rather than the south coast of England? Thus avoiding all the dinghy palaver.

That would only encourage them- the idea is to stop them coming at all!

FridayNightBlues · 25/09/2026 15:46

JapanesePotWeed · 24/09/2026 20:03

The alternative is stopping them from crossing the Channel! At the same time as making the destination country and unattractive option.
There are plenty of unattractive options in Europe and we should follow their lead.

Ah I see. That would explain why the NHS is such a mess!! 🙂

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 15:48

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 15:39

That would only encourage them- the idea is to stop them coming at all!

Who's idea? Because I don't see any of that. All I see is hundreds of French and UK government employees helping them to get here. We should just be honest about it and provide coaches from France.

OP posts:
keeptalkinghappytalk · 25/09/2026 15:50

: A UNHCR audit cited Home Office figures showing only half of asylum decisions met government quality standards, down from 72% in 2023.

above - we grant asylum to more people than our European neighbours do, we grant asylum to people based on their own account and little more, we grant asylum to people who have destroyed all their documents, we grant asylum to people for whom 'checking' their home countries to verify their stories is disallowed, as it may put them in danger, we grant asylum because - as a recent Home Office Whistleblower indicated - it is very difficult for caseworkers to refuse asylum requests and in fact generates a lot more work - making a case that will have to stand up to legal appeal.

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 15:53

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 15:48

Who's idea? Because I don't see any of that. All I see is hundreds of French and UK government employees helping them to get here. We should just be honest about it and provide coaches from France.

Why do you want thousands of undocumented young men coming here? Coaches would increase the number ten fold. Not a popular choice! So much for protecting our borders

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 15:56

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 15:53

Why do you want thousands of undocumented young men coming here? Coaches would increase the number ten fold. Not a popular choice! So much for protecting our borders

Thousands of undocumented young men are coming here. 700 odd yesterday alone. The amount of resources spent on that process must be eye-watering

OP posts:
Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 15:58

OnARainyDay2012 · 25/09/2026 13:18

So ... like having a legal route to claim asylum in the UK from overseas? So that desperate people don't have to pay thousands to people traffickers and risk their lives in the channel? I mean ... yes this seems like an obvious choice to me. No hotel or barracks accommodation needed while applications are processed, so that's a cost saving. People who are approved arrive by legal means and immediately get a job and start paying tax, also great. We get to balance out our ageing population.

But they don’t immediately get a job unless in the black economy, so not paying tax. Many will go on benefits , and if granted asylum will apply to bring over their families including several wives, all eligible to claim benefits- is that a good idea?

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 16:00

OnARainyDay2012 · 25/09/2026 13:18

So ... like having a legal route to claim asylum in the UK from overseas? So that desperate people don't have to pay thousands to people traffickers and risk their lives in the channel? I mean ... yes this seems like an obvious choice to me. No hotel or barracks accommodation needed while applications are processed, so that's a cost saving. People who are approved arrive by legal means and immediately get a job and start paying tax, also great. We get to balance out our ageing population.

If they’re that desperate they shouldn’t risk their lives to get here , plenty of safe countries en route

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 16:08

notanothergecko · 25/09/2026 11:44

This thread makes me agree that the migrants actually do need to be spread out over every postcode. People are never going to agree and will continue to have such polarising views when they’re experiences are just so different.

They do not need to be spread out, they need to be stopped, which is the point our Government is missing.

ThisUmberSwan · 25/09/2026 16:16

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 15:56

Thousands of undocumented young men are coming here. 700 odd yesterday alone. The amount of resources spent on that process must be eye-watering

Edited

These young men have no business being in our country and we as you say we don’t want them here. Why can’t they stay and fight for their own countries instead of ruining ours? We shouldn’t make it easier for them to arrive it should be harder in my opinion to
keep Britain British and safe. I’m almost very certain you’re rage baiting at this point. Why should they come in and come above the Brits? They have 0 right to be here and 0 right to anything. If the roles were reversed we’d be harmed on entry into their country. Everyone has a right to live and a peaceful life but they could sure as hell leave ours alone and make their own better country and life again.

ThisUmberSwan · 25/09/2026 16:17

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 15:58

But they don’t immediately get a job unless in the black economy, so not paying tax. Many will go on benefits , and if granted asylum will apply to bring over their families including several wives, all eligible to claim benefits- is that a good idea?

Wow someone that gets it

ThisUmberSwan · 25/09/2026 16:18

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 15:53

Why do you want thousands of undocumented young men coming here? Coaches would increase the number ten fold. Not a popular choice! So much for protecting our borders

The OP doesn’t want to protect our children or our women.

Theunamedcat · 25/09/2026 16:22

Rumbleafteryog · 24/09/2026 16:14

What’s the relevance of the dad and toddler?

He ditched the child in the ocean i doubt he is the actual father if he is the child is better off without him

Theunamedcat · 25/09/2026 16:23

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 16:08

They do not need to be spread out, they need to be stopped, which is the point our Government is missing.

The government apparently pay France to do it

They also allegedly arrested someone who slashed a boat

OneoftheWeddingPeople · 25/09/2026 16:24

Also our jobs market is not great at the moment. Sorry but we need available jobs for our own young adult children. It’s not like they are plugging a labour gap.

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 16:33

ThisUmberSwan · 25/09/2026 16:16

These young men have no business being in our country and we as you say we don’t want them here. Why can’t they stay and fight for their own countries instead of ruining ours? We shouldn’t make it easier for them to arrive it should be harder in my opinion to
keep Britain British and safe. I’m almost very certain you’re rage baiting at this point. Why should they come in and come above the Brits? They have 0 right to be here and 0 right to anything. If the roles were reversed we’d be harmed on entry into their country. Everyone has a right to live and a peaceful life but they could sure as hell leave ours alone and make their own better country and life again.

Not rage baiting. Whatever you or I think about it, they are coming and our Government's are spending a fortune facilitating channel crossings. Its crazy. I think that the process should be simplified with coaches from France rather than the south coast of England. Avoid the whole channel crossing madness.

OP posts: