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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

That it's a massive waste of time, effort, money, lives and we should just bring them over by coach and ferry.

257 replies

Ablondiebutagoody · 24/09/2026 16:03

I have just watched the video from earlier today/yesterday of a migrant boat departing Boulogne. The one where the Dad (presumably) ditches his toddler in the sea in order to get onto the boat. The kid was instantly picked up by French emergency workers and it struck me that this whole situation is completely bizarre.

There were approximately half a dozen lifeguards around the boat on jet skis and paddle boards, probably also a load of police out of frame. The boat will then be shadowed by French coastguard vessels until halfway across the channel, at which point border force/RNLI will pick them up and bring them to the UK. They will then be greated by coaches, a couple of hundred riot police and some (redacted by MNHQ) before continuing to their destination.

AIBU to think that this is all a total farce and we should simply provide the coaches from the outset?

YABU - The current arrangement is best.

YANBU - Coach and ferry would be better for everyone.

OP posts:
Bellesbest · 25/09/2026 07:38

EasternStandard · 24/09/2026 16:39

To a rescuer not in the sea.

Op the ferry idea would just be a huge draw for people to France, they’d be overwhelmed and you couldn’t say yes to everyone.

The other option is clearly chaotic and risky, another person died trying this week.

So neither.

No @EasternStandard clearly the Op is saying the father dumped his son into the sea so that he could climb aboard the migrant boat

I won’t whether @Ablondiebutagoody will be back to bother to post a link to this video

PoorPhaedra · 25/09/2026 08:13

The thing is they don’t have any other way of claiming asylum. You can’t claim from a British embassy in your home country and if you don’t have a visa you can’t get on a plane. As we’re an island that means you have to cross by boat. If the Uk opened a processing site in France that would stop the boats, but they won’t as certain aspects of UK politics would crucify any government that did that.

Avie29 · 25/09/2026 08:18

They aren’t fleeing here for safety, they are safe where they are- or as soon as they leave their home country, they are coming here because they know they will get stuff- in my town they have knocked down 3/4 bedroom houses to build blocks of bedsits to house them- BEDSITS meaning obviously not families- single people- probably men- and the worst part is one of these blocks are right next to a primary school, they have entered the country illegally, we know nothing about them, and they are housing them next to a primary school 👏 🤦🏻‍♀️ ridiculous.

NancyThompson · 25/09/2026 08:20

PoorPhaedra · 25/09/2026 08:13

The thing is they don’t have any other way of claiming asylum. You can’t claim from a British embassy in your home country and if you don’t have a visa you can’t get on a plane. As we’re an island that means you have to cross by boat. If the Uk opened a processing site in France that would stop the boats, but they won’t as certain aspects of UK politics would crucify any government that did that.

The very vast majority are not asylum seekers anyway.

PissedOffNeighbour22 · 25/09/2026 08:30

@EmeraldRoulette totally agree. I was stalked and sexually harassed by a migrant. He followed me to work and back, followed me on my lunch break, hung around my workplace. I ended up having to be escorted by my then partner. This was a few years back so we had nowhere near the amount of young migrant men with nothing to do that we have in the country these days. Police wouldn’t do anything because they had no idea who he was and he hadn’t actually physically or sexually harmed me. So that was a fun few months for me. It only ended when I changed my job and moved to another town.

Ablondiebutagoody · 25/09/2026 10:12

Bellesbest · 25/09/2026 07:38

No @EasternStandard clearly the Op is saying the father dumped his son into the sea so that he could climb aboard the migrant boat

I won’t whether @Ablondiebutagoody will be back to bother to post a link to this video

I'm not your PA, just Google it.

My AIBU was regarding the actions of the French and UK Governments rather than the man in the video.

OP posts:
whoopsnomore · 25/09/2026 10:30

BrezhnevsLuxuriantEyebrows · 24/09/2026 19:49

Whatever France are doing to make people view it as such a terrible country, so unthinkable to ever consider staying there, that they would rather risk their lives to leave it in favour of an equivalent country in terms of wealth, prosperity, privilege, developed status, quality of life and onward opportunities (well, fewer since Brexit)... could we not do the same?

I'm not against controlled, legitimate immigration to the UK at all, for those who show us the basic decency and respect of following the proper legal procedures - exactly the same as we would have to if we wanted to move to Australia, the USA and most other developed countries. But please let's stop pretending that these people are somehow still asylum seekers (even if they began as such, although curiously, their womenfolk and children apparently weren't in any danger); absolutely nobody is having to flee any western European country in fear of losing their lives, or even their basic human needs.

Edited

In fact overall France takes more, both in net numbers and per capita. UK is around 10th or 11th placed by head of population for numbers of asylum seekers. It's a myth that "they don't want to stay in France" because many do.

whoopsnomore · 25/09/2026 10:31

NancyThompson · 25/09/2026 08:20

The very vast majority are not asylum seekers anyway.

Thanks for interviewing everyone and assessing their claims, Nancy

MaturingCheeseball · 25/09/2026 10:52

It is now getting ridiculous, with multiple boats arriving every day. And every boat filled with men we do not need . There is no unskilled work available, and they are not going to be care workers. Allowing free roaming of men without any documentation is absolute disregard for the safety of the population.

The more who successfully cross the channel, the more it will encourage others. Are we expected to support anyone and everyone who wishes to live here, identity unknown?

On another thread those in favour seem to be either clueless people who live in completely unaffected areas, or those anti-establishmentarians saying that we somehow “deserve” it for past sins.

FirmSnake · 25/09/2026 10:53

whoopsnomore · 25/09/2026 10:30

In fact overall France takes more, both in net numbers and per capita. UK is around 10th or 11th placed by head of population for numbers of asylum seekers. It's a myth that "they don't want to stay in France" because many do.

We are 12th in Europe. Globally we're somewhere around 75th per capita. Some perspective is necessary.

JHound · 25/09/2026 11:00

Ablondiebutagoody · 24/09/2026 16:03

I have just watched the video from earlier today/yesterday of a migrant boat departing Boulogne. The one where the Dad (presumably) ditches his toddler in the sea in order to get onto the boat. The kid was instantly picked up by French emergency workers and it struck me that this whole situation is completely bizarre.

There were approximately half a dozen lifeguards around the boat on jet skis and paddle boards, probably also a load of police out of frame. The boat will then be shadowed by French coastguard vessels until halfway across the channel, at which point border force/RNLI will pick them up and bring them to the UK. They will then be greated by coaches, a couple of hundred riot police and some (redacted by MNHQ) before continuing to their destination.

AIBU to think that this is all a total farce and we should simply provide the coaches from the outset?

YABU - The current arrangement is best.

YANBU - Coach and ferry would be better for everyone.

I think if people want a cap on those wanting to claim asylum (or being allowed to) that should be respected.

I do think the current approach is unsustainable but I don’t know what the sensible approach is. You can have a hardline approach that states no boat arrivals will be assessed for asylum and recommence offshore processing. They can look to other countries (such as Australia) to see what they did (I have not looked deeply so no idea).

loulouljh · 25/09/2026 11:10

They should not be here at all./ What other country can you come into like this? It is an utter joke...although completely unfunny.

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 11:15

loulouljh · 25/09/2026 11:10

They should not be here at all./ What other country can you come into like this? It is an utter joke...although completely unfunny.

100% agree

FirmSnake · 25/09/2026 11:18

loulouljh · 25/09/2026 11:10

They should not be here at all./ What other country can you come into like this? It is an utter joke...although completely unfunny.

Admittedly most countries are not islands, so people are not entering by boat, but most countries have people entering via irregular means.
How little do you know about the world to think that we are the only ones dealing with it?

NancyThompson · 25/09/2026 11:18

whoopsnomore · 25/09/2026 10:31

Thanks for interviewing everyone and assessing their claims, Nancy

Ask this whistleblower, not me

https://www.thetimes.com/uk/law/article/one-in-100-asylum-claims-are-real-whistleblower-claims-d8768mjnx

Verifying Device

https://www.thetimes.com/uk/law/article/one-in-100-asylum-claims-are-real-whistleblower-claims-d8768mjnx

MaturingCheeseball · 25/09/2026 11:19

Just saw that in Sweden it’s been found that 80% of those who claimed asylum have been travelling back and forth to their home countries.

I am going to claim asylum in Primrose Hill - because it’s nicer than where I live now.

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 11:21

pelamo · 24/09/2026 20:49

A processing centre, or centres where background checks are done, and detention until the asylum claim is approved etc. But where?

I have a daft idea (yes I will be mocked and worse...), An island off the coast of Britain. Think of one or more that are sparsely populated, not easy to get to, and then hugely incentivise pay the inhabitants to leave and set up home on the mainland, all expenses paid. Then put all the asylum seekers there instead of Rwanda.

It would be economical in the long run.

Ok, I'm ducking down now.

And how will they be looked after on that island? Staffing, Accommodation, medical care , schooling etc. You haven’t thought this through have you?

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 11:23

Do people still think there are professionals, doctors, teachers, scientists etc coming over on these boats? It’s laughable. There may be the odd one, but the majority will be economic migrants.

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 11:29

pelamo · 24/09/2026 20:20

I often wonder what exactly is the pull factor in the UK, as opposed to asylum in France? Is it the fact that UK is English speaking, do the migrants have contacts with relatives already here, is the absence of a National ID card a way to avoid detection for crimes, and out of reach of Europol etc., is it the hard sell of the traffickers that UK is heaven on earth and you must pay to get there. What?

Anyone know, or any other theories? France is a very nice country to live in I would have thought. But if migrants don't think so, well then the UK might have to look at why that is.

Not surprised why they come here!
Not the language as millions are spent on interpreting
All their needs are met, accommodation, medical,clothing, entertainment , social, plus opportunities to work in the black economy.
Opportunities to bring over other family members to be a drain on the state.
Why wouldn’t they come?

JHound · 25/09/2026 11:30

loulouljh · 25/09/2026 11:10

They should not be here at all./ What other country can you come into like this? It is an utter joke...although completely unfunny.

It happens in a lot of countries. Well desirable ones but all countries have irregular migrants. The rest just arrive by plane and simply never leave.

I don’t know how we eradicate that issue.

JHound · 25/09/2026 11:31

MaturingCheeseball · 25/09/2026 11:19

Just saw that in Sweden it’s been found that 80% of those who claimed asylum have been travelling back and forth to their home countries.

I am going to claim asylum in Primrose Hill - because it’s nicer than where I live now.

I think even unsafe countries have safe parts. I was surprised that a friend of mine has just been in Ukraine for work!

pelamo · 25/09/2026 11:34

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 11:21

And how will they be looked after on that island? Staffing, Accommodation, medical care , schooling etc. You haven’t thought this through have you?

I admitted that! But every problem has a solution, and with all the money sloshing around accommodating the AS at the moment, some could be diverted to make a state of the art processing centre on a (soon to be) uninhabited island.

Appoint some of the professionals that we are told make up a big cohort to work there for payment of course. All that talent could be put to good use, doctors, lawyers, teachers, translators, engineers, draughtsmen, architects, chefs, and so on. Then they will then have a great CV for the day they are granted refugee status.

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 11:37

pelamo · 25/09/2026 11:34

I admitted that! But every problem has a solution, and with all the money sloshing around accommodating the AS at the moment, some could be diverted to make a state of the art processing centre on a (soon to be) uninhabited island.

Appoint some of the professionals that we are told make up a big cohort to work there for payment of course. All that talent could be put to good use, doctors, lawyers, teachers, translators, engineers, draughtsmen, architects, chefs, and so on. Then they will then have a great CV for the day they are granted refugee status.

Er….again , you haven’t thought this through? Professionals? Highly unlikely!

TwinklyAmberSloth · 25/09/2026 11:40

Ablondiebutagoody · 24/09/2026 20:55

That's my point though. There isn't any border control. It seems that anybody who can scrape a couple of grand together can jump on a boat and be escorted here at great effort and expense by the French and UK Governments. Why not cut out the whole English Channel charade and let the migrants get a coach from France instead?

Because they have no right whatsoever to come here.

We are a small island and already over populated and are so reliant on imports already.

France have over double the land we do and the same population. In fact countries like Poland and Slovakia have even lower population densities, and Spain has a tiny population density!! Perfectly safe countries!

We already have programs that bring over genuine refuges safely to this country. People who have lost their home due to conflict and deserve to be safe.

These are not refugees on these boats. They are economic migrants. They are not coming from unsafe countries.

The fact that they are risking their lives to cross the sea must mean that what is on offer here is worth the risk. That offer needs to be removed. Coming to the UK illegally needs to be something with no attractive pull whatsoever.

pelamo · 25/09/2026 11:43

Allseeingallknowing · 25/09/2026 11:37

Er….again , you haven’t thought this through? Professionals? Highly unlikely!

There is a slight tongue in my cheek I'll admit. But I recall reading somewhere that many AS are professionals from war torn lands who have enormous skills and we should welcome them with open arms in order to help our economy .

Visas cost a lot of money and time/admin and they are not always approved. By claiming asylum one could arrive, be processed, live and be supported here, and eventually achieve refugee status and settle with a professional job. I don't know what the non professional cohort will do, but a work visa is never going to happen for them anyway, is it. So that's one reason they come via the boat route I reckon.

I'm making no judgement, just wryly musing.