AIBU to tell my neighbour’s Year 6 child to stop walking to school with us?

I did. The child said his parents said he could follow alongside OP. Children talk shite to get what they want.

But what’s to stop him following alongside op and her kids (his friend)? It’s a public road and they’re all going in the same direction, to the same destination.
Imagine creating a scene where a young child had to cross the street / lag behind / speed up so he wasn’t walking within your sacred sphere?
Nobody normal would even consider it.

The least the other parent could do is to have the courtesy to approach you and ask if it's alright if my child tags along with you and your children to school.

However as that courtesy isn't earned, if your own children are off for the day for whatever reason, or you decide to change your routine and go to school earlier/later, then I wouldn't reciprocate that non-existent courtesy, and I wouldn't let the other child/parent know of any change in your plans - as no agreement has been set in place in the first instance if anything of this nature arises.

Oh I agree. I think OP is overreacting.
The school route is the same route for OP and her new wee friend, her children like this child. I don’t see the issue. I don’t believe his parents told him to wait for OP to walk with her.
Some children are social chatterbox types.

dont say anything to the child, it’s not his fault and you don’t know if his mum actually said that, she may have said stay near people that are going towards your school and not necessarily to walk specifically with you. Your words will have an impact on this kid if you say anything, he’ll remember if when he grows up. It’s not any bother for you as ur walking towards school, so let him tag along just don’t feel you are responsible for him.

You need to speak to the mum. can't believe anyone struggles to work this kind of thing out for themselves

I don't understand what you'd even say to the child - like forbid them to walk near you on a public road? You sound ridiculous.

So will/when will you talk to the mum at school collection . Or knock on her door and chat

Exactly this.

Talk to the parents? Don't say that to the child they will wonder what they've done wrong , I understand it's not your responsibility but they are still just a child and they're just doing what their parents said to do, if you aren't happy with that then go and speak to them.

I like to chat to my own kids walking to school i wouldn’t want someone else interfering in my routine and conversations to be honest

Ah, sure. Nothing has been agreed with the parents. So that means OP is not responsible, and therefore, if the child was run over by a car, OP would be able to simply walk on and do nothing, right?

Please think about that for 10 seconds.

Same for @TicklishReader

What are you on about? Op would presumably stop to help this child if he got into trouble, in common with any normal human being?
That doesn’t mean she’d bear any actual responsibility at all.

If you don’t mind me saying, I find your patronising posts exhorting people to use their common sense, think about things for 10 seconds, etc. quite jarring when you’re clearly failing to do this yourself before posting.

@KilkennyCats Op would presumably stop to help this child if he got into trouble, in common with any normal human being?

Yes, that was my point. The fact that OP would have to stop the child and help him if an emergency happened means that she is responsible. Not legally responsible, but morally and ethically.

That doesn’t mean she’d bear any actual responsibility at all.

Having to help someone in an emergency means you are responsible for them. That's what "responsible" means.

And as I already suggested, the fact that person A is not legally responsible for child B is irrelevant. On a moral and ethical level, we have to stop and help children who need help.

Yes, that was my point. The fact that OP would have to stop the child and help him if an emergency happened means that she is responsible. Not legally responsible, but morally and ethically.

No, stopping to help would be the action of any normal human being who happened to be in the vicinity
Op would be no more “responsible” than any other passerby.
What sort of life do you lead?

People are wild ! He would be walking that way even if you wernt ! I’d take what he said about his mam
with a pinch of salt , he’s year 6 so what if she’s sat at home with a cuppa honestly , in year 6 I let my kids walk to school to prepare them for secondary school

my son had a child in his class who tagged along with us I didn’t mind at all he was polite and chatty , on the way home I’d watch him across the road till he was safe in his house not because I was asked to but because I’m a mother myself

what a weird spiteful world it is these days

For heaven’s sake talk to the parents, not the child.

I mean to me it doesn’t sound like the parents know what’s going on. Sounds like they’ve given their child a bit of responsibility to walk themselves with it being last year of primary in preparation for starting secondary school next year, and the child is tagging along for company. If you feel uncomfortable feeling like you are responsible for him maybe knock on the door speak to the parents and just tell them how lovely it’s been having him join you on the school run, you just wanted to introduce yourself and make sure that they know that you won’t always be walking to school. The parents are prob unaware.

How sad. Everyone complains that communities are dying and there’s no “village” anymore to support parents, and then people go along and encourage you to prevent a child, who’s old enough to walk to school alone and who is friends with your children, from walking next to you on a public footpath. Lord almighty. Like a pp said, just tell the child to make sure his/her mum knows you won’t always be walking to school, but if you are, then what’s the problem?

The cheek of the other parents would be my problem. Expecting someone ( without ever asking ) to make sure their child gets to school safely whilst tbey have their own younger kids to look after. Your child is YOUR responsibility. Very odd behaviour from these parents.

This. Neither me or my children for that matter would want this. This is our time and I don’t want some random invading our space and taking our time.
And people saying “it’s your child’s friend”. No OP didn’t say that. She said they sometimes play together. That doesn’t mean they are friends. My kids will be friendly with and play with plenty of kids, but don’t consider them friends, and would feel very uncomfortable having to walk with them to school

What will you do when your kids want to chat to their own mates on the way to school rather than chatting to you. Cry and sulk?

No, by that time they either go together without me or if it’s a genuine friend they want to walk with it wouldnt be an issue would it?

I wouldn't like it - I wanted to talk to my own kids on the way to and from school, not mind someone else's! I think that if it's 'too dangerous' for a year 6 child to walk alone, then one of his lazy arse parents should take him!
It's also rude af to not actually ask you if this is okay.

Start driving to school for a couple of weeks or leave earlier/later, to break the habit.

The CF neighbour is the thing that would piss me off, not the poor child. I'd want to make a point about that to be honest, but I'd talk to the neighbour and not the child. The point is, I probably wouldn't have an issue with this if my neighbour asked me in advance so I could check with my own children that they were ok with it. It would give me an opportunity to say "there may be times when it's not possible, so I'll let you know when that's the case". Adults offloading their own children to other adults with no prior agreement really annoys me. Dd has a friend who is always roaming around on her own. We have no relationship with the parents whatsoever, but because we feel responsible for her, we end up running her home because it's getting dark, or making her dinner because it gets to 6 and she's not heard from them. They literally give her the green light to go out wherever and whenever without checking who she's with and making arrangements. There was a man wandering around and randomly talking to young girls a couple of months ago, asking them how old they were. Still no sign of her parents to ensure her safety, so we became her responsible adults.