AIBU to count my son’s bedroom makeover as a birthday gift?

It is off. Unless he wanted it, he is 8yrs old.

Absolutely not. He is only 8 and can't unwrap a decorated bedroom. Presents are important at that age

The way I have always done it is if they chose to have a big party with their friends then they get a smaller gift but if they don’t then their gift is bigger. I have done bedroom makeovers as part of their gifts but only as an additional big to replace any gifts more of a nice surprise. I think you are giving them a party, they have presents to open, and redecorating their bedroom, I wouldn’t be rushing out and buying anything in addition. Xxx

YABU. That's not a gift, it's something you should be doing anyway.

You have got him absolutely loads of presents anyway the room decoration can absolute be part of that especially all the pictures and furniture.
Kids don't need endless piles of stuff.

He's also getting loads of presents!

Originally I thought YABU but my son has been given a gaming chair and desk for his bday and was very happy with that! So if you’re meaning a gaming set up is one of his presents YANBU. If you are decorating his room to be ready on his bday and he hasn’t seen it yet I think opening some presents then saying and also your bedroom is ready and showing him would be super exciting and a nice thing, especially filled with balloons as you say 🎈 I hope he has a lovely day!

Only since OP read some of the responses on her

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On occasion, we did similar for our kids but we’d go the extra mile if we were classing it as part of a present - letting them choose things like some sort of funky decor , wall art, a new gadget, etc - just to make it more special & less functional/necessary than the upgrade we’d have done anyway.

He asked for it but by the way you've described it it does sound like it needs doing anyway and that's just part of parental responsibility (the painting part at least).

The accessories and new bedding I feel like could be classed as additional gifts though. Could you wrap them up for him to open as part of his birthday?

As others have said, it already sounds like you've got him loads, the OP made it sound like the bedroom was his only gift!

Gosh no I wouldn’t.

At 8 he's not going to know too much about the cost of things, he'll just enjoy having something to open. I think it's fine to wrap a few of the minecraft accessories up as gifts. Don't put yourself in a difficult financial position buying extra gifts.

I think it's absolutely fine @QuirksAndCardigans. He's 8, getting a party, his room decorated and furnished and has some presents to open, that seems plenty to me. No wonder we complain about people being too entitled lol

My god how much more do people think this child needs?
Yes it can be included as a gift. He is getting lots of extras that aren't just "painted walls" its part of a theme he has asked for.
He has presents and a party too.

Painting/decorating isn't a present but a new gaming set up absolutely can be. Alongside his other gifts and party I think he'll be able very happy birthday boy!

If he's getting a party and gifts then I don't see the issue? Maybe if the room makeover was INSTEAD of a party and/or gifts I'd say it's fobbing him off a bit, but he's getting all that anyway so he's not missing out on anything at all.

If it helps, my son turns 7 just before Christmas. He's having a party with some friends on his birthday which he's excited about. For presents he's basically asked for as much star wars Lego as physically possible 🤣

I don't want to be completely drowning in Lego by January, so although he's getting PLENTY of sets I know he'll love, plus some little surprises, plus money/vouchers (this is across birthday and Christmas and includes gifts from relatives etc) I'm also planning on getting him some bits to do his room up which I know he'll really like.

fully agree, having a party and will get gifts from his pals too, something to open from mum and dad, and a new bedroom to boot.

very lucky boy. no need to second guess yourself here OP.

You're not off the mark at all and people are talking from a place of entitlement. A whole new room with cool furniture, bedding, gaming lights, pictures, etc., books, a Nintendo game, Tonie story, Lego set and a party!

I'd wrap the furniture boxes, the lights, and the bedding so he has more to open and be done with it. One Christmas I got a card with a picture of a desk in it from my Nan and Grandad, to show me what I was getting. I was well chuffed. I loved that desk!

Will he be able to choose any of the stuff?
My parents decorated my room without me knowing and I hated it, I actually loved it beforehand so it definitely did not feel like a gift
It felt like another example of having no control over any aspect of my life

If it’s paint, carpet, basic blinds, then no. If it’s new furniture too then possibly. For example, we decorated my daughter’s room with a new dressing table, a new canopy bed etc… all that she wanted /chose. I would definitely count that as a gift.

I think this is totally fine along with some gifts to open. My parents did this for me when I was teenager and I loved it. I picked the furniture and had a ‘cool’ bedroom. I still remember it now.

I don't think there would be any problem with massively toning down his gifts (I have done this for my dd any time she has an expensive party anyway) but I do personally think that it's important that kids experience the excitement of waking up to a couple of gifts and the front room decorated for them etc. Mine has never had more than a couple of soft toys/books etc for her birthday as she's chosen to have parties but she still loves that excitement of coming into the front room. I can remember visiting one of my nieces one birthday at a similar age and they'd literally had a card and nothing else from their parents because they'd been bought a pet several weeks earlier. Yes brilliant that they got a pet but I felt quite sad for her. Even at this age they're way too young for that kindof retrospective thinking and IMO it doesn't take much money or effort to at least decorate a room and buy and wrap a couple of cheap gifts

Same. I got a pine bed and matching furniture for my 12th birthday. I still feel aggrieved 😂

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