Is drinking a bottle of wine four nights a week a problem?

Yes, that's definitely a problem. The definition of binge drinking for women is 7 units in one drinking occasion. A bottle of wine is 9-10 units, so you are effectively binge drinking 4 times a week. Regardless of whether you think you're functioning normally or not, you are really damaging your liver.

What's going on in your life that it takes you a whole bottle of wine to relax? Is there anything that can possibly be changed (eg job) or is it something to do with family that's harder to fix? Have you tried any other ways to relax apart from wine?

If you could reduce the stress or whatever it is that makes you need to drink a whole bottle of wine to relax then you might find you will drink less as a result

Yes I would consider this person to be a functioning alcoholic who needs help.

I think that is a lot. Need to find other ways relax.

I think it's a lot, and it is definitely over the weekly limit for a woman.

But, if you don't have wine the nights you would usually, would it make a difference to you?

Yes it's a lot and I would think that person had a drink problem.

Yes

Still no clearer….

I don’t know which way to vote. But that is a mega problem to me.

Yep, that’s problem drinking. How do you not feel shit all the time?

even if you feel fine, it will catch up with you sooner than you think

If I drank in that pattern I would feel like ratshit and you might find that if you're honest, you do too, and that's the reason. Someone who is close to you has noticed it as an issue so that's probably worth exploring given that it's several times the recommended amount per week.

It's too much, certainly, from a health pov. 40 units a week.

Whether it indicates dependency is more complicated. Have you tried stopping/ cutting down? If you find that difficult then yes there may be some dependency at play.

"Still functioned, still worked, still took care of family" is a low bar. My experience (as someone who used to drink a similar amount) is that regularly drinking that much just makes life a bit shitter in multiple ways which are hard to specify. You may be keeping everything together but you won't be living your life as fully or as joyously as you could. You may not have killer hangovers but you won't feel as well as you could. You may still be taking care of your family but those relationships will just be a little bit less rewarding than they might otherwise have been.

Give it up completely for 6 weeks and re-assess.

Yes its a problem.

Its nearly 3 times the recommended level. You are at much higher risk of health problems. The fact you are “functioning” is neither here nor there. Lots of problem drinkers hold down jobs etc.

More to the point its clearly in dependency territory if you need it to relax.

That’s a lot of alcohol, and will be damaging your health. Sometimes you won’t know until it’s too late.

I think it is. That's four full bottles a week. I drink 1-2 125ml glasses a night most nights - usually just one, and I am conscious that this is a bottle and a half a week, which is right at the top of the healthy intake level. Four bottles a week is well over twice the healthy intake for a woman, or about twice the recommended intake for a man.

Could you try to slow it down by measuring 125ml in a small glass then pouring it into a massive glass and topping it up with loads of ice and soda water to make a spritzer?

Could you have some good soft drinks chilled so you alternate a glass of wine with a can of aqua libra or san pellegrino. There are lots of unsweet ones now.

If you enjoy it & it’s not causing any problems to your life, then that’s fine. Is the other person impacted by it? It’s a problem for them.

When I was doing just that it didn't seem like a problem at all

Now I look back and recognise it very much was

Four bottles a week? Yes. It will have a detrimental affect on your health if you drink that much regularly. I average between 4-10 units a week normally and only have more on high days and holidays. Try the Drinkaware app to log your drinking honestly to start with. I had a phase when I was drinking 25-30 units a week and it helped me cut down. If you are having four bottles a week you are having 40 units a week. The recommended weekly maximum is 14 units for women in the UK.

4 bottles a week? Of course there's a dependency on alcohol there.

Your an alcoholic in denial.

Yes it's a problem on quite a few levels.
Even if you feel you are functioning ok.the damage that is being done to your body is immense. Increasing cancer risks, potential heart disease. damage to the memory and brain etc And of course the liver.
It 's also about the dependency and the fact your consumption will almost certainly increase

I say all this as someone who has had a struggle with alcohol most of my adult life and constantly has to make sure I don't drink irresponsably.
Honestly OP i really think you should try and do something about the amount you are drinking whilst you can.

I think you have to look at the pattern that has got you to 4 bottles. Did it start at one? Just a glass? The problem becomes bigger the more tolerant you become. My mum started at one bottle then 2 and can now do up to 3 bottles a night. She always argues she’s functioning but her perception is very different to sober people around her.

do you think about the drink in the day? Tell yourself it’s a reward? If so you maybe making excuses because you already know it’s an issue.

Can you try alternatives? We have Trip drinks in the fridge for the week (CBD and Magnesium & alcohol free) and save the alcohol for the weekends if we want it. You will feel a lot healthier cutting down.

It’s not healthy, no. Does it make them a raging alcoholic? No. But it’s not healthy.

It’s also potentially a very slippery slope. I am a recovering alcoholic. When I stopped drinking, I was drinking 3 bottles of wine a night. Don’t let that fool you into thinking I was always that much of a drunk though. 3-4 years before, I was a one bottle of wine a night 3-4 times a week drinker.

Once your brain creates those neural pathways, you will use them more and more and more to get relief.

That's 36 units a week if your bottles have 9 units.

Try the CAGE questionnaire on yourself. It's a validated screening test. You'll find it in google but in short, 1 point each for:

Have you ever wanted to cut down?
Have people annoyed you by criticising your drinking?
Have you ever felt guilty about drinking?
Have you ever felt you needed an eye-opener?

Scores of 2 points or more have 91% sensitivity for identifying alcoholism.

Yes, it’s too much. Far too much. And if you can’t give it up then yes, it is a problem and you should start doing something about it.