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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to think my son should not charge friends for lifts?

296 replies

KatherineJ1775 · 14/09/2026 08:37

Hi there, I need some advice on this.
Little bit of backstory, my son is 17 years old, and has just got his driving license. He’s always been an outstanding individual, very generous and kind. He has been driving himself to college recently, and we were proud of him for willingly going out of his way to bring his friends to school (instead of making them take the bus).

What we’ve recently discovered is that he’s implemented a flat-rate fee, charging his friends slightly shy of £1 per ride to college.

Both my husband and I agree that this is ethically corrupt. My son thinks it’s his car and he can do what he wants.

Any advice?

OP posts:
icouldholditwithacobweb · 14/09/2026 09:49

Your second update changes things a little - so then you tell him if it's his car and he's making oney, you don't need to be covering fuel, maintenance, MOTs etc for him anymore and leave him to it.

PensionPTake · 14/09/2026 09:49

I'm slightly baffled as to why you're more concerned about the petrol money than the boot issue though.

oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 14/09/2026 09:49

UnitaBath · 14/09/2026 09:00

These kind of threads are getting ridiculous. Next you will be saying some friends are riding on the roof rack!

They'd be paying in rupees !

ktopfwcv · 14/09/2026 09:49

(instead of making them take the bus).

He wouldn't be making then take the bus either.

Dontbesonosy · 14/09/2026 09:50

PussyGaylore · 14/09/2026 08:44

I think ‘ethically corrupt’ is a total overreaction. Where I come from we call it’ contributing to petrol money’.

This.
YABVU

Girliefriendlikespuppies · 14/09/2026 09:51

I’d be telling him to charge more than a quid! Bloody hell ethically corrupt 🙄🤯

ATurtleRanMeOver · 14/09/2026 09:51

It seems to be the norm here, they all pay each other a few quid if getting a lift from mates. It seems pretty sensible to me.

ZombieZebra · 14/09/2026 09:52

Disclaimer, I don’t drive for medical reasons so don’t know much about rules. Is this ok with his insurance? If he had an accident, could the insurance try and wriggle out of paying if they found out about it?

Other than that, I think it’s fine that they chip in for fuel.

diddl · 14/09/2026 09:54

(OK it was fairly common in the early 80s but we know better now!)

What?

It has never been a thing has it?

Unless I'm misunderstanding.

ClairDeLaLune · 14/09/2026 09:55

He could take more mates to school by putting them on skateboards and getting them to hang onto the spoiler. He’s missing a trick here.

oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 14/09/2026 09:55

I checked the "hire or reward" with my insurance company years ago; it means for commercial purposes - giving someone a contribution towards their petrol costs is OK.

YourGoldLurker · 14/09/2026 09:56

ThisAutumnTown · 14/09/2026 08:38

It’s less than a pound, saves them loads on buses and it’s more comfortable.
He needs to pay petrol so I don’t think it’s bad at all.

He'd be paying petrol anyway surely

purplecorkheart · 14/09/2026 09:59

Even if you are covering his car and petrol he is still using his own time to go out of his way to pick up and drop off. The pound covers that.

In regards to the trunk do you mean the fold up seats?

YourGoldLurker · 14/09/2026 09:59

KatherineJ1775 · 14/09/2026 08:49

Sorry all, I missed the fact that we bought the car and cover petrol and he’s also letting his friends get in the trunk.

Should he charge reduced rates for the boot?

Are you being serious. He's putting his friends in the boot. What if he had an accident or if he was stopped by the police. He's that desperate to make cash he's filling his car up and putting mates in the boot

Isittimeformynapyet · 14/09/2026 09:59

icouldholditwithacobweb · 14/09/2026 09:49

Your second update changes things a little - so then you tell him if it's his car and he's making oney, you don't need to be covering fuel, maintenance, MOTs etc for him anymore and leave him to it.

There's only one update, and it does change things but probably not in the way you think. It tells us that the OP was bollocks all along.

leavesinthebreeze · 14/09/2026 09:59

35 years ago when I was the only driver amongst my friends (I was the first to turn 17 and had a car straight off) my friends always chipped in for petrol. There was no drama or arguments - having me as a driver helped them and saved them money and helped me towards filling my car as a 6th form student. Your son is right and isnt taking the piss in what he is asking. Good on him.

Gloriia · 14/09/2026 09:59

scotlandundersiege · 14/09/2026 09:42

I give up.
The friends should help towards petrol. You should not be paying for his petrol. Of course he shouldn’t have people in the boot of his fucking car.
I blame the parents.

Same. What else haven't you taught him regard road safety op? I hops he's pulled over and banned before he kills someone.

YourGoldLurker · 14/09/2026 10:00

This is a piss take. No one would be comfortable with their son putting mates in the boot of a car

Isittimeformynapyet · 14/09/2026 10:00

YourGoldLurker · 14/09/2026 09:59

Are you being serious. He's putting his friends in the boot. What if he had an accident or if he was stopped by the police. He's that desperate to make cash he's filling his car up and putting mates in the boot

Show quote history

Or, the OP is pulling our leg?

YourGoldLurker · 14/09/2026 10:01

leavesinthebreeze · 14/09/2026 09:59

35 years ago when I was the only driver amongst my friends (I was the first to turn 17 and had a car straight off) my friends always chipped in for petrol. There was no drama or arguments - having me as a driver helped them and saved them money and helped me towards filling my car as a 6th form student. Your son is right and isnt taking the piss in what he is asking. Good on him.

Did you put your mates in the boot too

WouldYouLikeAnyToast · 14/09/2026 10:01

KatherineJ1775 · 14/09/2026 08:49

Sorry all, I missed the fact that we bought the car and cover petrol and he’s also letting his friends get in the trunk.

Should he charge reduced rates for the boot?

Christ, that's a bit of a drip feed (because answers aren't going your way maybe?!)
Why not say he's letting people into the trunk (boot?)
As I think that's a separate, unreasonable issue altogether. Nothing wrong with a bit of petrol money for someone who's giving you lifts, that's perfectly normal.

leavesinthebreeze · 14/09/2026 10:02

KatherineJ1775 · 14/09/2026 08:49

Sorry all, I missed the fact that we bought the car and cover petrol and he’s also letting his friends get in the trunk.

Should he charge reduced rates for the boot?

Missed your update. Of course they shouldn’t be going in the boot 🤦🏽‍♀️ but he is not wrong for friends chipping in. My dad paid for my insurance, mot and tax and enough petrol to get me to 6th form and back (only way I could get there) but any petrol over that was on me

WouldYouLikeAnyToast · 14/09/2026 10:02

YourGoldLurker · 14/09/2026 10:00

This is a piss take. No one would be comfortable with their son putting mates in the boot of a car

Also only mentioned it when they presumably didn't like the answers they were getting!

MyOliveStork · 14/09/2026 10:02

When my son and his friends passed their tests they all routinely charged each other for lifts like a taxi. That way they all helped out with cost of fuel etc and encouraged someone to drive and ferry mates around on a night out. It didn’t last long as they all eventually passed their tests and so just took it in turns.

Silvers11 · 14/09/2026 10:03

KatherineJ1775 · 14/09/2026 08:49

Sorry all, I missed the fact that we bought the car and cover petrol and he’s also letting his friends get in the trunk.

Should he charge reduced rates for the boot?

I was believing this - until this post!

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