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AIBU?

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To cancel going to friends wedding

904 replies

Watdidusay · 12/09/2026 21:18

We have a close friends wedding to attend in 6 weeks. It's been booked about 6 months in advance. We've prepaid for travel, hotels, childminding and bought traditional clothing for the event. I'm in the wedding party.

Just received an invite to my SILs wedding today (DHs sister) for the same date. In 6 weeks time.
Different part of the country.

Family are all saying we have to cancel the other wedding. We are going to be out hundreds of £.

AIBU to go to family wedding instead just to make my life easier? Everyone is angry at me for even considering not going to DHs sisters wedding. I feel terrible.

OP posts:
Freshrain · 18/09/2026 21:39

ellie09 · 18/09/2026 14:30

Unexpected costs of attending a wedding, they aren't cheap are they?

Depends on the wedding. I've been to more than one wedding which hasn't cost me anything, other than me choosing to give a present.

socialdilemmawhattodo · 20/09/2026 21:22

Anonyanonay · 18/09/2026 10:11

MIL sobbing would only make me more determined not to give in to such egregious emotional manipulation.

No, my long ex- and now deceased MIL was a great one for this crappy behaviour. It's an absolute no.

Peachie31 · 21/09/2026 18:43

Watdidusay · 15/09/2026 10:47

So I have an update. Still no response from SIL but FIL and MIL phoned DH last night with MIL sobbing in the background. "How could you choose someone else over your own family" was said. DH did argue that SIL never asked us to save the date and response was essentially "you know she finds this stuff stressful" so DH continuing to be guilt tripped. I did not let on that I was listening to the call.

"How could you choose someone else over your own family"

Wow. Just wow.

They sprung this on everyone 6 weeks before and are throwing a tantrum that people have the audacity to have already had plans? Wow.

BudgetBuster · 21/09/2026 19:33

Any updates @Watdidusay

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