AIBU to question preschool after inconsistent explanation for toddler's scratch?

I understand what you’re asking, all you want to know is exactly how it happened, which is understandable as a parent.

Quite shocking that one poster said “does it matter”. Really!!!

What is it that you are trying to establish exactly? What is your concern exactly? That it was done deliberately by an adult? That your child was dangerously unsupervised?
Personally I’d imagine it occurred as a result of normal toddler chaos. Presumably you thoroughly checked the nursery out when you chose it?

This.
Also nobody did this scratch to your child! Your dd moved herself ie by running/walking/turning onto the adults hand! The person responsible for the injury is your dc herself. Fingernails do not have to be long or sharp to cause an injury, it is the speed and angle of contact.

My friend’s daughter had her arm broken when a nursery worker accidentally sat on it. A scratch is nothing. If you react like this to every scratch you’ll have a heart attack before she makes it to school.

The two explanations don’t seem inconsistent to me either. Just two different perspectives of the same event. If you make a big fuss you’ll mark yourself as ‘that parent’.

Your kid coming back with accidental scratches and bruises I think is actually the sign of a good childcare setting. Children should be in places where they have accidents they lead to mild injuries (not breaks or scars - but minor risk assessed and ultimately safe but with a small amount of peril). It’s a really important part of learning and resilience and robustness in kids. That might include being in a scenario where they make contact with an adult and accidentally get scratched. That’s why it’s normalised.

The explanations are not inconsistent. I have long nails and DH has short nails, he’s accidentally scratched me many times when his nail has snagged or broken a little bit leaving a sharp edge. My long manicured gel nails are never scratchy because of the gel, but also aren’t really appropriate for a child care setting so it’s not an avoidable scenario.

It seems pretty conclusive that it’s not abusive, and you can be on higher alert for future injuries - but despite what you say here you are indeed forensically examining a minor incident with absolutely no benefit (if you get shown the CCTV and definitive truth, what does that even change).

its a difficult job minding children and for very little money.

I think you’re overreacting sorry

With respect you're massively over reacting. I work with young children & have accidently scratched a child on the forehead before. I was ushering them out the front door & had my hand gently on their head, when I turned away to speak with another child the child who's head I had my hand on turned to the other child too & turned into my hand. They had a little red mark on their forehead where my nail slightly caught them, which Mum wasn't concerned about at all when I explained how it happened. Accidents happen so unless you have other major concerns about the preschool please try not to worry.

I (accidentally) knocked a small child's tooth out once. She walked up behind me without me knowing as I was turning around and my laptop bag (over my shoulder) caught her mouth. It was already a wobbly tooth but there was blood and tears and I felt dreadful. I've also smacked a child in the face when we were doing PE and they pretty much walked into my outstretched hand. Again I felt dreadful. These things do happen as small children often don't have any concept of personal space! It's very easily done

The big difference is that bullying and burnout in the workplace are not accidents, whereas bumps, bruises and scrapes usually are, @Roseypurple. Children run around without looking where they are going and trip over, they catch themselves on things, they bump into each other or the staff.

Of course the staff should do what they can to prevent these accidents or lessen the impact of them - checking toys for sharp bits, trying to keep the floor clear of trip hazards, watching the children - but they cannot be wrapped in cotton wool. No child gets through childhood without some bruises and scrapes, unless they are never allowed to do anything - and that would be more damaging than a skinned knee, imo.

I raised three boys to adulthood, and I can assure you that they had their fair share of bumps, bruises, scrapes and fractures, and on plenty of occasions their dad and I could not have told you what had happened in minute detail, because we couldn’t have our eyes on three of them at the same time. Nursery workers are trying to supervise a number of children, and they can’t always be watching every child, so the explanation you got is probably the most detailed the staff member could make it. Better they are honest than that they make up details they don’t actually know.

Picture it - your hand is by your side and a child runs up to you and runs into your hand, while you are watching another child. You don’t see the incident, but feel the child run into you and see a small scratch on their face - that is all the detail the staff member will be able to give you.

Kindly, you need to calm down. And where’s the contradiction, your child bumped into an adult and got a scratch. My child gets scratches, bites, falls down and over stuff when at nursery…they’re children, these things happen.

I dislocated a child’s shoulder before and I felt terrible,he had fallen over and I gave him my hands to help him stand up but unbeknown to us he has a shoulder weakness as it had happened once before at home but the family hadn’t passed on the message.

i felt ill at the thought of innocently hurting a child while I was trying to help. His parents were so kind as it had happened when they had done the exact same hing but they thought it was just a one off.