AIBU to find my MIL’s constant need for praise irritating?

She’s just making conversation

"Aww that's nice/ bless" change convo and redirect. Obviously it's just a subject for her to talk about.

My mil does it. We don't see her often so there's always a lot to talk about and she's very proud of her family I guess

Its just a conversation

But as she is a MIL, you'll be supported on here to say she's manipulative, socially inept, autistic, PD, narc, go NC, etc etc

I mean people are irritating. i have some wonderful close friends who do and say things that irritate me and I’m absolutely sure they feel the same! But we don’t all think and feel the same and its not done to deliberately cause offence so.
DH also irritates me - after 30 years together - but I still love him. U know I drive him mad too.
Just respond in the moment and don’t overthink it.
Devoted Mums are always proud of their children whether they are 5 or 55 and love to tell family and friends about them. It’s normal.
We are all human and irritating in our own way.

Sounds really annoying. Not one of the worst problems you could have, but still.

Do you have enough people acknowledging your achievements? I used to be bloody irritated with my SIL and think her relationship with her mother (my MIL) was too enmeshed and immature. But I journalled about it and discovered I was envious as my own "D"M couldn't care less about me. The envy stopped straight away and life was easier around them.

I think YABU. You sound rather mean spirited or jealous as it’s just ordinary chit chat.

Does MIL go out much or have many friends?

Clap ??

I too agree it’s just making conversation . I also agree it’s not really a conversation is it op? More like a mundane list of ordinary life events. She’s sharing “what’s going on with everyone” even little stuff like a haircut.

i think your neutral response is the way forward. Acknowledge the comment and that’s it and if it’s really mundane like…John works so hard he’s exhausted…say yes we all are.

Isn't this just having a conversation?

I don't think it's just conversation, I think it's tone deaf, unless the MIL is admiring OP too. Otherwise it's a bit "they're great aren't they, and then there's you..."

Of course, lots of people are tone deaf unfortunately and have no interest in how the receiver of their words is going to feel.

Thats a very self centred way to look at it, why would the MIL talk about OP, she's talking bout her own kids.

Smile and give her a thumbs up each and every time.
This may irritate her enough to realize you are not the person to whom she should be telling this.

Oh my god, go no contact with the conversation making bitch. NOW!

I think it's just conversation too. OK maybe not top level conversation that's going to win gold in the conversation Olympics, but talking about things going on with your family is pretty normal. She has a positive attitude which is nice, I'd rather that than complaining. Just bring up some different topics if you find that boring.

I think it is just conversation tbh - she is saying what is in her own head as important stuff. But I can see how it could be a bit annoying as my lovely MIL does it a fair bit too. I adore her but it is sometimes irritating. My favourite one was when she said a year or so after BIL married "oh Pallisers isn't it great, SIL X has changed her name to ours" and then realising that actually I hadn't changed my name (genuinely don't think she had a problem with that at all) and it might fall with a bit of a thud. I just smiled.

It's just boring small talk, isn't it? What topics of conversation do you initiate with her?

If her kids are in their 50s then she’s at least in her 70s if not 80s. Perhaps at that age her children are now her focus and that’s what she’s got to talk about? What do you contribute to the conversation? Steer her away into talking about other things. Or, just go along with it as really how hard it it to make an elderly woman happy?

I agree with others, she's just trying to make conversation with you, trying to find a connection. What do you talk to her about, or do you sit mutely and try to ignore her?

Honestly? I think if this is all it takes for you to be so irritated you need to post about it, you need to get some perspective.
No one is perfect. We all have traits that irritate other people. You will have ones that annoy her I'm sure.
However unless we want to spend our lives in a state of constant annoyance or waste time plotting how best to annoy back people who annoy us, worsening our relationships in the process, we accept that people's irritating traits are not about us and we don't have to be perpetually poised to take offence.

Yes it sounds a bit annoying. I have a cleaner who is constantly pointing out the absolutely Norman, standard things she’s done and I have to thank effusively about each and every one. It’s a bit tiring so I do get where you’re coming from but try to think about it a different way and be generous about it yourself rather than wanting it to stop or it’ll just grate more and more

What do you talk to her about? Can you ask her for her opinion on something, or give your thoughts and ask her if she agrees?
She probably doesn’t have much else to talk about, so talks about or you both know.
Perhaps ask her if she believes in aliens or ever wanted to be a Russian spy; you might have a more interesting chat.

Yep. This.

😂