AIBU to worry my son is too young to marry?

My husband and I got engaged after we'd been together for 6 months. We married 18 months later. I was 24. I'm now 52 and we're still married! Definitely not too young.

sounds like they have been together for a lonh time, he should know what he wants. let him make his own choices.

They openly write down in their code of conduct that they are in breach of equality legislation?

Having worked in several such schools you're talking complete nonsense.

She’s 100% not out to get his money. They are obviously in love but that doesn’t alter the fact that she will get 50% or more when in high probability, the marriage fails due to their young age and lack of life experience. They are unlikely to grow in the same direction as they get older. They may do, and hopefully they will, but there is a high probability as stats show, that they will grow apart due to their age.

The op is right. She should have realised this before she signed the deed of variation.
The longer they live together the more sure they can be.

The sheer number of threads on here that are 'this man i married at 25, who was my only boyfriend, and i have zero in common now that we are in our 30s' mean i will not change my view on this

Reporting bias - people don’t tend to start a thread in MN about how they still enjoy their husband’s company.

Yes YABU.

Just think of it like this. Imagine your son was 10 years older and single, not meeting anyone. You’d worry about that! I think it’s wonderful that he’s found his person while he’s young and they can build their lives together.

We also gifted a chunk of money to our DD when she got married, and I did worry briefly that it was risky if the marriage broke down. But her fiancé’s parents also gave him money, and it was a lot more. Marriage is always a risk but you can’t go in to it thinking about the worst outcome otherwise it’s doomed from the start.

I've worked in Catholic schools, I was taken off the interview list for a senior leadership position because I was divorced.
Headteacher, divorced, kept her relationship quiet, then got married as soon as she retired.
Parish priest berated and upset a teacher as she was not getting married in church as she was marrying a divorcee in the register office.
Two other teachers, in a relationship, kept it quiet and drove to school in separate cars.
It happens in the 21st century.

Yes

I dont get what the issue is, are you saying she should raise it a million times? He will cut her off 😩

Raise it once, lay out all your concerns as to why its a bad idea, and then tell him you love and will support him, but youve told him

A boy in love will think hes being a good husband by choosing his fiance

I got married when I was younger than that and had been with my husband for less time. Couples came to the wedding who then got married when they were 30. All of us are still married now decades later.

When you gave him the money it became his to do as he wishes with. He could have gone and bought an 100k car and spent the rest on booze and drugs…he chose a house that he might, if they divorce one day, lose half of worst case scenario.
He seems a sensible adult who is fortunate to have met his spouse while they were young - plenty of my friends are divorcing people they met in their 30’s who they married after a couple of years. Life generally works out in the end - look on the bright side, surely the younger you are as a potential grandparent the better?

And why is this?
Posters keep repeating this fact without thinking of the reasons behind it. It’s not because 25yo are suddenly very young and are now considered child brides.

Finances don’t stress as far these days, cohabiting is acceptable, more women have careers, unmarried parents are much more acceptable.

Unless a choice, I think most people would want to be in a committed relationship in their mid-thirties. Not sure whether your unmarried friends in the 30s fall into this category.

No, my headteacher told me I was on the interview list as she'd provided a reference and spoken to the new head where I applied. She supported me going for the job. She obviously shouldn't have told me as invitations to interview had not gone out. She then had to tell me why I'd been taken off the interview list. As there'd been nothing in writing I couldn't do anything about it.

Mine is quite a lot younger and a ‘step dad’ figure with a baby on the way - plan to get married next year.

Embrace the beauty of life and celebrate with him.

OP when are you going to stop trying to run your son't life?

@Eralione I think that's a normal age in light of the fact that it's a long term relationship. If the relationship was only 3 years long, then that would be too fast.

Mine is a similar age. I would be far from thrilled but obviously I would have to accept it. I just think there’s so much life to live post uni that it’s a shame to get married so soon.

They could get divorced years down the line, same as people who get married in their 30’s 40’s or 50’s.
It sounds like you are worried they will split and she will be entitled to funds from the house, rather than their young ages.
If they are going to have children, would you rather they don’t marry and she is financially vulnerable if she leaves work to look after children?

You can worry all you like, but it’s a pointless exercise. My daughter and son in law got married 88 days after they met. She was 26, he was 22. They now own their own house and have four children, six, four, three and one. She’s a SAHM, he’s in the armed forces. I think they stand as much chance as anybody else at making it work. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t surprised, but worrying would have made no difference.