AIBU to say 6:30am isn’t the middle of the night?

I'd have given the child milk he was obviously hungry after being unwell and what kind of idiot tries to make a kid go back to sleep after they've slept most of the night? Tell him to get over himself.

Whatever. I don't care to be honest.
Rather that than live vicariously through other people's drama and be somebody. who trawls through other people's past posts frothing all the time.

It's obviously a storm in a teacup that's over.

As I said if he were actively forbidding here from taking care of the child it'd be different.

Doesn't seem to have been the case though.
Not really.

You know exactly why women don’t leave arsehole husbands.

because it’s tough.

don’t be the person that minimises DV by saying “it it was that bad she’d have left”.

Valid that not every family can afford to survive on one wage coming in. But if a couple are planning to have another child - the couple save for the loss of income during maternity...maybe that's what the op meant?

I'm sorry what?

Why is it on you to save money for maternity leave?! Bloody hell. Parenting is a joint endeavour, DH should be contributing more over your maternity leave not half.

What the hell.

Exactly @Morethanalover has been comprehensively pulled up on her posts and so … wants the thread to just end.

Nope, Mumsnet doesn’t work like that

So he gets to spend his weekends basically as a single man doing what he wants with no responsibilities until he comes home to put them in bed and he’s verbally abusive to you. What a keeper.

Your husband is a fkn arsehole

💀💀 you don’t get to decide when the thread is over - although I’m sure it’d suit you for it to end so you could forget your embarrassing contribution.

many women “make up” with partners who are abusive to them, unkind to their children because for myriad reasons.

OPs DP:
verbally abused OP
denied their sick child milk
obstructed OP from stepping in and caring for her sick child
spends limited time with his family
requires OP to use her savings to finance her mat leave with their child.

none of those behaviours on their own are pleasant. As a whole it’s a pretty depressing picture of a marriage. Trying to persuade her that it’s normal because your own bar is on the floor is shameful.

Does it occur to you that you are massively in the minority on this thread that maybe, just maybe, your standards are in the gutter?

I mean, no, a 4 year old playing alone for “a couple of hours” in the morning isn’t age appropriate whatsoever.

Look at it this way, if the dh really were absolutely forbidding the OP from taking care of the child what on earth is she still doing there?
Crikey if this is actually what happened I'd be saying myself to leave!!
Why is she even posting on mumsnet instead of just leaving him?

The fact is they've made it up.
So it's a storm in a teacup, no?

Of course I can't declare a thread over.
It is a case of nothing to see here move along, though.

Some people's lives though are such that they live vicariously through other people's drama I guess.

Of course a four year old csn go back to sleep at that time! Or if they don’t want to sleep, by thst age, they're perfectly old enough to play quietly in their room for a couple of hours.

This

Unless this is the sort of thing that's happening on a regular basis, it's good you've had a talk. He's said you can have a couple of hours to yourself, so maybe a good idea to get yourself out - visit someone, go for a walk, go to a cafe with a book or just people watch.

Did he not want another baby then?

It was his turn to get up with his children, why on earth would “for goodness sake let me sleep while you get on with it” even be appropriate in this situation?

You don't get to decide when the thread ends 😂

You're just pissed off because people are pulling you up on your awful attitude.

Oh I agree, however, it's him currently going out to work, not her.

He just fancied a proper sleep. I don't blame him.
Looking after children is hard but not absolutely regimented like having to be up at a certain time.

I doubt that the dh was actively stopping the OP from providing care, anyway, just oh for goodness sake, let me sleep while you get on with it.

Such a fuss over nothing.

Yet people are still determined to get vicarious drama by commenting here.

Leave the bastard etc.

One of the great pleasures of my life, from early on (very clear memories from 6yo), was waking up with my dad at about 6am and the conversations we had when our head was so clear. We watched the sun rise or the fog clear. Went boating before anyone was out. Played chess. I learnt about light and evolution and astronomy and...

You DH needs to start to find out his children's waking hours before the mornings become wasted on them.

Take at least half the day!
And make sure he does more than “hold the fort” ie babysit; active parenting

It's very plausible in this day and age that not every man could afford to cover the shortfall of a maternity leave. Like not every man can afford to support their wife being a stay at home mum.

What. A. Dick.

No matter what the circumstances/reason or how infrequently it happens or how great someone usually is, I would absolutely not tolerate being sworn at like that by my husband!!!!! 😡

That’s good then. No point in spoiling a day over a brief exchange. He’s apologised. No need for further drama. 😊

You dont think your sick kid wanting a drink is a good reason to get up? Or your baby being awake at their normal time and ready to get up?