AIBU to think lifestyle expectations and spending habits have risen enormously?

You said you loved vintage clothing
on this very thread 😕

So your friends are aware that your lifestyle and spending is very different to theirs?

What’s your family income out of interest @Hiredgun ?

Right ok… your lifestyle is not markedly different.

So the OP was a little overblown?

😆

sorry I meant… for men? You love vintage clothing for men? I didn’t know this was a “thing”!

I have to go to 💤!

but would be curious to know how much the family income is?

I am going to guess quite low
and you really feel the difference to your friends who earn and spend more

good night!

The country and individuals are hugely mired in debt. I blame the 80's shows from America where everyone had everything they wanted, supersized and with bells on. It was shown as aspirational to be greedy and companies globally jumped on it to sell as much as they could, without caring where it ended up. Consumerism is in overdrive. In my opinion we have a finite world and humans are not built to have this much information and competition.

It always bemuses me how we still have a class system in this country but it is almost all based on ethics and manners over money, largely because anyone can buy whatever they like if they are foolish enough to get a loan.

What a peculiar post!

But did you not have a television? Or books or magazines?

It would appear not! And to think… late thirties. So born…. Mid/late 80s!!

Did you go to uni @Hiredgun ?

I think it’s interesting how many people assume you can’t afford these things

Clearly, I don’t know for certain but I’m pretty sure we earn similar amounts to our friends, if not more. Not having the latest Range Rover and 2 holidays abroad doesn’t mean you can’t afford it, you might just not want it!

As for the children trying lobster - it’s £35 a pop in our local restaurant! My DS loves fish and he was allowed to try it at his birthday meal. Is he allowed it every time we go - no chance! We can afford it but why would we set him up for a lifetime of expecting to be able to afford lobster?!

If she wants to try, why not. Neither are expensive as you think, both available at posh supermarkets (waitrose). Don't deprive them of experiences for the sake of it.

I remember when my DC was young having a friend who had everything materially. Her financial situation was the same as mine. I was shocked when she said they bought it all on credit and that as long as they could make the minimum payments they were fine. I do use credit at times, but massively prefer to save up for things.

I don't understand risking your life collapsing due to unpayable debt, if unemployment or inability to work through ill health happens.

My brother ran up debt with the same attitude of buying what he wanted if he could afford the monthly minimum payment. Loads of credit and store cards. When he got a new one, he’d see the credit limit and go out and spend it whether he needed stuff or not. Racked up tens of thousands and didn’t see a problem as he just paid the monthly minimums - never realised the huge amount of interest he was paying nor that the debts weren’t being paid off as the monthly minimums just covered the interest. That was back in the 80s! People getting into debt by reckless spending today is nothing new - people were doing it 2 generations ago! Before the explosion of credit in the 80s people still did by borrowing on hp, renting stuff, getting stuff on tick from shops or using dodgy money lenders.

When you say you see so much, is it mostly on social media? I think that’s a big reason why people do certain things, and share them so widely.

I think there’s a pretty big backlash against all this in some circles, but you won’t see it because it’s not on social media.

Tbf renting in the 60s and 70s was the only way to have a tv as they were incredibly expensive as were white goods and furniture
What has happened since then is a complete reversal
Stuff, electronics, white goods have become cheap and disposable and houses have become ridiculous
If you cant buy a house you can buy a new phone to cheer you up, although the early queues for a new iphone seem to have gone
In the 80s/90s store credit was a huge problem along with catalogues and I knew people who got into trouble with those
Cheap credit/ low interest rates, reduction of previously strict lending criteria over the last few years with H2B meant the market was flooded with cheap, thrown up houses and so people could buy houses they couldnt really afford
Cheap credit meant it could be furnished and a fancy car outside.
The illusion of having money became the new norm
It became the norm to spend what was offered to you -its called credit not debt right?!
The explosion of botox, fillers and face tinkering took off

Until interest rates rocketed, mortgages doubled and we havent even seen the shit show thats going to come with H2B yet

I work with peoplenot all are women who are up to their necks in debt, cannot afford to pay their bills and buy basic food But they keep the botox and eyebrows, nails etc because its become their whole personality
They are within a massive community on SM and I guess its difficult to let that go?

Why? It makes perfect sense to me. She's talking about the seeds of neo-liberalism and globalised corporate capitalism that were sown in the 80s, and saying that we fell for it. It's true.

The only way that economic system can survive is if it constantly expands its market by persuading us that we need things that we didn't need last year.

I was pointing out where it started. People lived frugally up to the war and late 70's then with colour TV and loads of American shows with luxury items (Dallas etc) in all of them which spurred people to buy things they wouldn't have thought of. You get paid more to work in advertising than saving lives as a nurse, which says it all.