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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to suggest poor public behaviour should affect access to services?

106 replies

Liggety · 19/08/2026 11:01

Following many recent threads about what is and is not permissible in a decent society, can we agree on a list of actions that should exclude you from accessing state services?

To start with:

Using a phone on loudspeaker anywhere outwith your own home.
Wearing PJs outwith your own home.
Playing music - inside or outside - so loudly it can be heard by neighbours.
Cycling on the pavements (cycling is my main mode of transport btw).
Wearing balaclavas outwith the high mountains.
Riding an illegal e-scooter or e-bike.
Having an off-lead dog in public that is not under your full control.
Dropping litter.
Wearing scrunch bum leggings and other revolting clothing in public.
Swearing in public.
Driving without using your indicators.
Men without a top on in public.
Working cash in hand, or paying cash in hand for work done while knowing or suspecting tax may not be accounted for by the service provider.

Some of the above are more tongue in cheek than others by all indicate no grace, style or manners and we need to remove them from our culture.

What are you adding to the list?

OP posts:
Boreded · 19/08/2026 16:14

Liggety · 19/08/2026 16:10

This sounds like a horrific, harrowing experience and obviously you were right to make a scene. I’m not talking about hushing up and maintaining decorum in horrendous situations to not make a scene. There are times when scenes ought very much to be made, and yours was clearly one of them.

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But by your original logic she was wearing loungewear/pjs so already on your list, that’s the point that Taztoy is making.

@Taztoy I’m really sorry for what happened to you and I hope you’ve able to recover and find some peace after this awful event, nobody should have to go through that. 💐

Taztoy · 19/08/2026 16:13

This reply has been deleted

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Original poster
Liggety · 19/08/2026 16:10

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

This sounds like a horrific, harrowing experience and obviously you were right to make a scene. I’m not talking about hushing up and maintaining decorum in horrendous situations to not make a scene. There are times when scenes ought very much to be made, and yours was clearly one of them.

OP posts:
Taztoy · 19/08/2026 16:10

So when he was raping me and doing worse I should have been concerned with my grace, style and manners? I can assure you I didn’t give a fuck about any of that whilst I was trying to stay alive. And passing out. All I was thinking was about my kids and what a horrendous mess they’d have to navigate.

Original poster
Liggety · 19/08/2026 16:08

Outwiththenorm · 19/08/2026 15:25

Reported

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Can I ask why you ‘reported’ this?

OP posts:
Taztoy · 19/08/2026 16:05

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

MsRubee · 19/08/2026 15:59

Liggety · 19/08/2026 15:57

I’m in a ranty mood. Been on a bus when someone was listening to some sort of video on their phone this morning. I just can’t think in what world they see that as acceptable.

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Fair enough. You are quite funny though, I bet you’re actually hilarious company.

Original poster
Liggety · 19/08/2026 15:57

MsRubee · 19/08/2026 15:55

Class isn’t a thing. Also you’re too ranty. You are tiring yourself out.

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I’m in a ranty mood. Been on a bus when someone was listening to some sort of video on their phone this morning. I just can’t think in what world they see that as acceptable.

OP posts:
Original poster
Liggety · 19/08/2026 15:56

RaraRachael · 19/08/2026 15:37

Used in most of Scotland . I can't think what word I'd use instead.

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I’m also trying to work out what other word I’d use instead. Outwith the house = away from the house maybe?

OP posts:
MsRubee · 19/08/2026 15:55

Liggety · 19/08/2026 14:13

I wrote the list. I never associated any of the list with class. That was other people. Are certain aspects of the list allowed if they are carried out by people of a certain class? If so which and why? Are people of that class supposed to lower their expectations of the society they live in? If so, why?

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Class isn’t a thing. Also you’re too ranty. You are tiring yourself out.

Original poster
Liggety · 19/08/2026 15:55

HangingOver · 19/08/2026 15:24

I sometimes have my radio on loud speaker on dog walks when I forget my headphones. The one person I see per hour might catch 10 seconds of it as we cross paths. I feel like society can live with that??

But why? Why not use headphones? The quality would be better and you’d not be disturbing others. Presumably you’d walk past houses?

OP posts:
olivepicanto · 19/08/2026 15:51

Abitlosttoday · 19/08/2026 14:48

Just readying myself to make this point. Thanks.

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Why?

RaraRachael · 19/08/2026 15:37

Hahabonk · 19/08/2026 11:11

Saying ‘outwith’

Used in most of Scotland . I can't think what word I'd use instead.

Outwiththenorm · 19/08/2026 15:25

Hahabonk · 19/08/2026 11:11

Saying ‘outwith’

Reported

HangingOver · 19/08/2026 15:24

I sometimes have my radio on loud speaker on dog walks when I forget my headphones. The one person I see per hour might catch 10 seconds of it as we cross paths. I feel like society can live with that??

igelkott2026 · 19/08/2026 15:18

Abitlosttoday · 19/08/2026 14:48

Just readying myself to make this point. Thanks.

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What's wrong with it? It's Scottish. I quite like it!

igelkott2026 · 19/08/2026 15:17

As for missing appointments, potentially. But there's a big but - one is the fact that the NHS insists on sending out letters which arrive after an appointment - you can't very well attend an appointment you didn't know about. And they claim not to be able to send reminders "cos data protection". Nonsense - lots of NHS services do, as do dentists, hairdressers etc.

The other big but is that GPs like to disingenously claim that they've had loads of missed appointments that month. I don't believe it. So few people get a face to face appointment (at least with the GP, nurses may be different) that I don't think they miss them at all. And a telephone appointment isn't an appointment - if you miss a call because they rang at a random time and you were on the loo or driving, that's their fault for not giving a specific time or at least window.

igelkott2026 · 19/08/2026 15:14

I'd certainly like to ban people who park on pavements from public life.

I'd settle for their cars being removed and crushed though. I suspect it would only have to happen a few times and they'd stop doing it.

Original poster
Liggety · 19/08/2026 14:59

Missing appointments is going on the list, but can I also add piss poor NHS admin too. I’ve taken the morning off work to get to a hospital appointment before to have been told that they cancelled it, even though no letter was sent. Then there’s the times that your left waiting for ages and ages. We shouldn’t have to be grateful to have the crumbs of a healthcare system just because ‘it’s the NHS’. We should be asking for a properly functioning healthcare system. But yes a good deal of the issue in healthcare is waste due to people who miss their appointment.

OP posts:
70isaLimitNotaTarget · 19/08/2026 14:58

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 19/08/2026 14:54

I'm adding-
Missing your appointments
Turning up late for your appointments
On the rare occasion you turn up on time or God forbid early- whinging if I am running 10 minutes late

And people who stride along looking at the phone not what's going round them The person who they expect to move might have poor sight or poor mobility.Actually arrogance like that deserves a good punch not just refusing services

Just to add the missed appointments get a phone call and a letter .
And I will 99% see latecomers because it isn't in anyone's interest not to .
But we have the frequent flyers who know this .

I still stand by my convictions for the mobile phone idiots especially if the6 have headphones too. A thrashing is too good for them

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 19/08/2026 14:54

I'm adding-
Missing your appointments
Turning up late for your appointments
On the rare occasion you turn up on time or God forbid early- whinging if I am running 10 minutes late

And people who stride along looking at the phone not what's going round them The person who they expect to move might have poor sight or poor mobility.Actually arrogance like that deserves a good punch not just refusing services

Abitlosttoday · 19/08/2026 14:48

Hahabonk · 19/08/2026 11:11

Saying ‘outwith’

Just readying myself to make this point. Thanks.

Hobnobswantshernameback · 19/08/2026 14:42

Ooh let's start a thread to bitch about people we look down on and say some shitty things and pretend it's just for the lols
how very sophisticated

whoopala · 19/08/2026 14:41

The NHS is a state service. So is the benefits system. Social services. The council. The police. Many others.

You want people who you disapprove to be barred from the services that keep them safe and alive.

You want them suffering, possibly dead.

If a woman is raped and beaten whilst wearing pjs, presumably the police should not render assistance.

Tongue in cheek, my arse.

Removing services for minor infractions against YOUR point of view is an abhorrent suggeston.

Do you think you're funny.

What nastiness.

Boreded · 19/08/2026 14:39

PurplebudsWhitebuds · 19/08/2026 14:35

@Boreded
When i read the OP I agreed with the serious points - the actual.illegal things - and I took the other things not to be serious.
Now I'm actually rather annoyed at a couple of the posts where OP has quoted me and had a go at what I've said for absolutely no reason. So I have rather lost sympathy with her and tbh I wish id never posted on the thread at all.
I hadnt. anticipated the threadt aking the turn it has.

Yeah I’ve found her replies to you to be odd. It makes it even clearer she knew what she was doing. You were defending her when I had called her out on the original post but then got it in the neck - bizarre.

I just get a little frustrated because people start these threads all of the time…and despite knowing it’s rage bait, this one pulled me in like a dope 🤦‍♀️

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