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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to feel uncomfortable about my neighbour's comments during renovations?

59 replies

Lew96 · 18/08/2026 15:17

New neighbour doing renovations, knocked on my door earlier to apologise for noise which is fine honestly dont mind it, not too noisey tbh. But then he started telling me how rock hard he is and if i ever need him to feel safe to give him a text and he'd be straight around... he previously gave me his number to make sure there was no one being weird around his property when he wasnt there as hes not currently living in the property, but he made me feel abit uncomfortable as he started saying no strings attatched and stuff after saying he'll keep me safe.... I don't know if its just me feeling uncomfortable or if that its normal to say no strings attatched about stuff.. so the question is AIBU to feel uncomfortable? Is he just being genuine... i think it makes me feel uncomfortable as he knows i have a partner who lives with me and he will avoid him like the plague, but when im out he will be straight out wanting to speak about all his money and cars and stuff...

OP posts:
Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 17:08

Haha @mommatoone i like that, honestly im just going to order a door bell, get that set uo and ignore when its him, if i do happen to bump into him when waiting with the kids im going to try and limit contact with him.usually i quicklh get my son back in an close my door a little till i know hes went in

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Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 17:05

I dont think hes a tough guy to be honest, he doesn't look tough in the slightest i know looks can be decieving but i wouldn't look at him and think he could fight, yeah he doesn't say a word when im with my partner. Thats what started making me think his interactions were abit weird, but yeah i will keep a diary, i wouldnt of thought of these things cause at the time i just panic and try and get away

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mommatoone · 18/08/2026 17:04

He sounds like an absolute dick. Sorry you have been made to feel like this OP. You should never have to feel uncomfortable in your own home. Make sure you watch his fingers in the door next time he calls though, you wouldn't want to embarrass him now would you 😉 🤣

Thisismyfinesthour · 18/08/2026 16:57

Sounds like a complete twat who wants to be a tough guy but comes across as being pathetic little man. It speaks volumes that he doesn't engage with you when your p is around, not quite the tough guy he likes to think he is obviously.
Def get a ring door bell and if I was you start keeping a diary of incidents and the type of convos just in case you need evidence in the future.
Don't speak more than you have to, ignore the smut, look blank don't laugh or smile. If you do smile it is only encoraging him. He'll probably get bored if he realises you aren't a pushover. If you do get worried, call non emergency police for advice.

Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 16:47

Thank you all for your advice i think im going to practice some waya to end the coversation, i just find it hard im such a soft person i struggle to say no or upset people

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Delphiniumandlupins · 18/08/2026 16:44

Practice some ways to end conversations with him, perhaps role play with a friend or your DP. "Got to go. I can hear my phone/left something on the cooker/in a rush." Try not to apologise, stand up straight and square your shoulders. He may just be awkward and overly friendly but he sounds like a real creep who is perfectly aware what he's saying.

Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 16:43

I think a video door bell is a good idea, id rather not answer the door to him.

OP posts:
BiteSizeByzantine · 18/08/2026 16:40

" ok mate". Then close the door, or leave or get in your car etc.

Monty36 · 18/08/2026 16:40

Mmm. Keep a record of it.

A new neighbour who says he has moved into somewhere rough. Doesn’t make much sense. Extending so he owns it.

Not the usual way a man would talk. And certainly his choice of words have a double meaning.

I would assume he realises it.

Do keep a note of it. And any further conversations.

I would also put up a camera. To observe how frequently he knocks at your door.

JHound · 18/08/2026 16:39

But then he started telling me how rock hard he is

Eugh!

ChocolateCinderToffee · 18/08/2026 16:37

He can't have been unaware of the double entendre when he said that, and why would he keep saying 'no strings' if he didn't want to hint at sexual favours in return for helping you out in some way?

I'd get a ring doorbell and avoid him like the plague.

Bluetray · 18/08/2026 16:34

Get a video door bell.
He sounds like a creep.
His conversation is not normal.

AdeleRochester · 18/08/2026 16:29

i know i dont want to be rude but i dont want to be pestered at the same time

Why not? He is being rude, he is making you uncomfortable.

You don’t have to stand at the door waiting for him to finish. You can just say, “I must go now” and close the door

Not wanting to be rude gets women into so many difficulties.

Wingedharpy · 18/08/2026 16:28

Well he might be rock hard but his communication skills are severely lacking!

Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 16:24

Yeah he deffo meant rock hard as in tough haha, an yeah he was laughung when he said no strings but just made me feel uncomfortable i dont know why

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lessglittermoremud · 18/08/2026 16:16

Im assuming he means rock hard as in super tough and no strings as in “
call me anytime and I’ll help out a neighbour, without you having to worry about what I want in return?!”
He expressed it really badly but I’m hoping that he didn’t mean quite what I thought when I read the OP 😳😂

Wetblanket78 · 18/08/2026 16:03

Creep that's sexual harassment I'm not sure what you can do. Maybe contact police on non emergency so it's logged.

Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 15:46

I dont think so as i said he actually hasnt moved in yet hes do8ng renovations before he moves in but every chance he gets to have a conversation he will when ive passed him in the street with my partner he will ignore me thank god! 😂

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Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 15:45

Yeah, ive always got my doors gates locked as ive young children, an i would never invite a stranger into my home, i dont even want to stand and have a conversation with him but he just keeps going, i dont know i thought i was being weird cause as i said im abit socially awkward even with people i do know and have known for years.

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clarathecaterpillar · 18/08/2026 15:42

He doesn't have a pitbull called "Robocop" by any chance does he ?

Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 15:41

I do actually ignore the door if im not expecting any deliveries. But i thought it was something ive been waiting for, i dont carry the conversation on or anything i try my hardest to get back in

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Mothrasstillmoshing · 18/08/2026 15:41

He's being predatory, thinks that your DP is weaker than him and that you're easy pickings. Men like this infuriate me because they're so difficult to deal with. My suspicions are set off from the tiny amount that you've mentioned here - I'd be considering a Clare's Law application and I'd definitely get a Ring doorbell or cameras back + front. I know it sound dramatic but also keep a diary and your doors + windows locked. Never let him in your home and do not give him any information as these types can escalate quickly or stalk slowly. Be prepared for small incidents to happen like car tyres getting a puncture etc where he's on hand 'to help' - sounds scary but these types are unstable. Your spidey senses have been triggered for a reason - listen to them 👀

Lexy2345 · 18/08/2026 15:39

Ignore the door when he calls round. He sounds over familiar and crude.

Original poster
Lew96 · 18/08/2026 15:37

I know I don't why he would even mention protecting me to be honest when he came to apologise for the noise...i know i dont want to be rude but i dont want to be pestered at the same time

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Nofeckingway · 18/08/2026 15:33

Oh FFS what a chancer . Horrible pathetic man thinking you need a hard man to protect you . And how disrespectful to your DP. Trouble is you don't want to tell him to Fuck Off as you don't want him to be an enemy. Smile inanely and nod .