So my mum is 84, she has multiple health issues including arthritis, epilepsy and she has issues with her memory at times (we’ve been to the memory clinic and there was no diagnosis).
My daughter is her carer, alongside raising her own children. She makes sure my mum takes all her medication, cleans her home, prepares all her meals, takes her to all appointments, collects her prescription etc.
I currently work 30 hours a week, on the two week days I don’t work, I help out by doing the afternoon visit, this lets my daughter take her children to toddler groups etc.
I also co-ordinate some of my annual leave to cover when my daughter goes on holiday and my son helps out too.
I haven’t been on holiday in 3 years now, I desperately want to go away in the easter school holidays with my children and their children. However my mum is extremely resistant to external carers.
I have asked my sister who lives 20 minutes away, no longer works, has a car etc. If she would be willing to help cover for a week in April, my daughter has asked her cousin too.
Cousin has said she can do the Monday to Friday leg, if we can make sure there are no appointments scheduled, food is stocked etc. She has asked if we can provide a travel cot as she will be brining her own children and just staying overnight for 4 nights, absolutely fine we can do this, we have even offered to make sure there is food stocked for her and the children too (well my daughter has).
However we still need the Friday to Monday covered, I’ve asked my sister and she has outright said no chance. She said she is too busy. I told her she doesn’t have to stay overnight, and a neighbour has offered to check in and make sure the night time tablets have been taken (my mum hates taking them so asking her on the phone isn’t enough you have to go over and stand with her while she takes them or she throws them in the bin!), so it would just be morning and afternoon.
AIBU to think this is ridiculous? It’s months in advance and she hasn’t said anything about a holiday or wedding so I have no idea how she already knows she’s too busy that weekend? Obviously we can just go away for 5 days instead of 7, but I was looking at the Canary Islands and that flight with 5 children doesn’t seem worth it for just 5 days.