Heaven knows I’m miserable now

You said that you don't want your child to have a dead father, so he is using emotional blackmail with his suicide threats. You have to get yourself and your son out of this situation. If you put equity into the house you would get money if it was sold? Womens aid and/or local authority may be able to help with accommodation until you get back on your feet. In a few years your son won't need childcare. You are correct this man is a complete parasite. I lived like this. Detaching myself and my daughter from the situation was the best thing I ever did. It wasn't plain sailing, but I got rid of our parasite ( he didn't kill himself, he went to on parasite some other poor woman) Although threats of suicide should be taken seriously, it is up to mental health services to treat and support in this case. Even if he did take his own life it would be his own decision. If your 10 year old is aware of these threats it would be a good time to start to educate him age appropriately about emotional blackmail and how suicide threats may be part of that and ( in the unlikely) event your ex does act on his threats it is absolutely not something that you or your son are responsible for. If your son has these mental tools he will be less vulnerable to future emotional blackmail. I would say that the situation you are in is akin to a hostage one. Please take the advice of everyone on here and free your self for once and for all of us this parasite. Don't be surprised if he doesn't attempt to make contact with your son after you have got rid . We all make ' mistakes ', but you can get yourself out of this, start planning now.

Yes this.
Get some professional advice to see if you can get your money back.

Do you have proof such as the money was transferred to him through a bank transfer.

If you were giving a large sum of money why didn't you get the house to be in both your names?
To save your investment.

You are asking how educated women can get themselves in fixes like this? Easily. Just watched a Netflix documentary about a young beautiful woman doctor getting involved with an unworthy individual and destroying her career and life in the process - so don't castigate yourself - JUST GET OUT!

Op, you do not necessarily need reference to rent. I was not asked for references when I applied to rent my house. Even if they ask, say you owned your house so you don't have a landlord reference.

Having a bad credit and a CCJ will not necessarily stop you either, they will check last 3 months bank statements to see if you can afford to pay rent, that is most important to landlords, not your credit.

I'm sorry this is happening, you're not alone, contact Women's Aid. You sound like you're minimising, you deserve support. Just talk to them about the situation and they will help you to understand your options for support. It sounds coercive. Even if he has got mental health, he can still be coercive, and threats to kill himself is one of the things they will discuss with you when they complete the risk assessment.
Reach out to them, they will help you break free from this man - you can start afresh & find freedom x

He doesn’t interact or speak to our child… He also provides childcare so I can work full time
Well that sounds like abuse of your child. And is nit a solution.

you have made some really poor choices, including making you and your child homeless while giving money to a man you are not married to. Do not make more poor choices. You need to get out. Staying is another poor choice

speak to a solicitor.

This, too, @Cantloseyou

https://womensaid.org.uk/information-support/the-survivors-handbook/im-not-sure-if-my-relationship-is-healthy/

Can you prove your money went into the house?

Sounds like your intentions were honourable. However, it seems you may have acquired a cocklodger by your own volition.

Get in tiuch with women's aid, they can offer you better advice.
They are very good.

Sorry you say he provides childcare but

How can he provide safe childcare if he doesn't speak or interact with the child?

So far, @Cantloseyou, you've described psychological abuse, coercive control and economic abuse.

https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/what-is-abuse/

One feature of abuse is that it fries your brain. It resets your norms of what is acceptable or tolerable, focuses too much of your attentions and efforts on the abuser and managing the atmosphere, limits your resources and gives you tunnel vision.

Have a look at this page. Then contact them for advice.

https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/what-is-abuse/

The first post says it’s the child’s dad.

Emotional abuse and coercive control. Please do contact a domestic abuse charity for help getting away from this abusive man.

You can stop being an idiot (your word) today and leave. Stop making excuses about being stuck, swallow your pride and tell your family you need help / somewhere to stay.

You cannot let a man who refuses to speak to or interact with your child, care for that child. Poor kid.

Also if he doesn't interact with or speak to your child thats a really bad situation for the child to be in.

How does he provide childcare if he won't speak to your child? Sounds like an awfuo situation. I am sorry you're in it

The constant name calling and threatening to kill himself so you'd move in are abusive. Second one is coercive control.

I don’t know what to suggest here but didn’t want to scroll past.
Is moving back in with family while you save an option?
I don’t think leaving your young child in the care of an unrelated male is a good idea, especially not one who is mean to you and who you suspect has mental health issues.
Can you get any of the 30 free hours to help? Is the child’s father or his family able to help?

But he is abusing you. Please leave. Your life is worth far more than this treatment.