Made a promise I can’t deliver on

As someone with a lot of piercings, seven just on my face, it’s not mutilation as much as decoration.

Piercings are fun, I remember begging my mother to let me get my nose pierced at eleven and she said pretty much the same as you, ears were the hard limit. By twelve she was taking me to the tattoo/piercing shop because I did it myself with a sewing needle and she preferred a professional see to it. I’ve always thought they were so pretty. It might be pointless, but only in the same way as makeup, jewellery, tattoos, hairstyles and fashion are pointless.

Calling it common is a whole other issue, it’s classism. I come from a ‘good’ family, was privately educated, I’m a teacher now, married, own a nice home and lead quite a middle class lifestyle by all accounts. I also have piercings and tattoos (on my hands even!) does that make me common?

Let girls and women express themselves I say.

I think that was pulled from “ The Guinness book of most bizarre statements “ .

Queen Victoria, that notoriously common woman ,had pierced ears. As did both Queen Elizabeths.

I have pierced ears because I like to wear diamonds in them.

Common? How old are you 100 + oh my now I’ve heard everything
that’s so pathetic is laughable…

My daughter filed down until it was really thin a couple plastic see through disc earring l.
she then puts it in backward so the disc is at the back and secured it with a few dabs of lash glue.
this was only for the first week or two of term until she was sure they’d healed enough to put on and out. She’d been desperate for them doing all the way through primary and in year 8 she did it

“ I remember the time I couldn’t pierce my ears because the school wouldn’t allow it , I was very disappointed but it thought me resilience “ . 🙄.
please stop talking shite .

When I was in primary school, I was stood next to two friends messing around in the line, ones cardigan got caught in the earring of the other and ripped it straight through the earlobe. Yes it could happen anywhere but school don’t want to be dealing with that on their grounds. That’s why it’s banned.

My 13 year old had her ears pierced for the first time right at the start of the summer holidays this year. I deliberately scheduled it for then (booked months ago) as her school will not allow earrings to be left in during PE (not even taped) - they have to be removed completely. I thought that the holidays would be enough time for them to heal for her to be able to take them out for PE once she goes back in September.

But the very reputable piercer has said they shouldn’t be removed for 6-12 MONTHS! She said that it’s possible they may not go back in properly even after an hour of being out for PE. So now I am panicking about what she will do…

Claires isn't exactly the holy grail of piercing!

My friend used to work at Claire’s, she said 6 weeks is fine.

What is this absolute obsession for girls having pierced ears? It's painful, common and pointless. I never have had mine done - why mutilate your body for a few cheap earrings?

Goodness, a school that assumes every pupil will get detentions is one I would run a mile from. It just screams out that they are giving way over the top punishments for minor infringements, which is no way to achieve a good behavioural ethos. It must also become counter productive if it's so routine that there is no shame in having detention.

Alternatively, how about getting yourself onto the governors and working to change this from within?

Could you buy her an ear piecing voucher that she can use when the time suits?

I’d let her have them done. She can wear her hair down to cover see-through plastic studs.

My daughter had her seconds done a week before the six weeks started and just covered them with her hair until the holidays.

Why is the school being "petty"? Kids have to learn they can't always get what they want when they want. So you say no to her. You're the parent. Not even sure why she gets an alternative treat as others say.

It really depends on the person. Mine took ages (and nearly closed up again a few times even though they should have been long healed)…

anyhow. I suppose over the summer holiday might work. 6 weeks of non-stop wear and wearing them over night as soon as school starts (if still necessary).

Ok, that's fair enough. Your plan sounds like a good one, and you've planned ahead.
Good luck for her in yr11 👍

She doesn’t want to cover them, I think she is worried she'll rip them off with the plaster. She has a very cautious personality.

And why?

She’d needs a different school. If that’s a priority for them, they’re missing the mark. It’s simply ridiculous.

Explain why and let her choose an alternative - jewellery, maybe some clip on ear cuffs will hit the spot.

Failing that she can just put an Elastoplast on it, just for that lesson. That's what a lot of students do.

My daughter is going into Year 11 in September. She asked to get her ears pierced so I booked her into a well established tattoo parlour who have been doing piercings for years. We went on the first day of the school holidays. They advised 6-8 weeks before removal. She goes back to school on Week 7. At her school they have to remove or cover them for PE. I will take them out for her that morning and put them back in after school.

Why would she apply for a place there then?
It makes no sense.

This school sounds like a nightmare. I would be refusing to send her somewhere focused on punishing and intimidating children from the word go until "they learn". I dread to think what they are like with SEN kids. I would be appealing this allocation and making arrangements to educate my child at home (somehow!) until an alternative setting can be found. Absolutely appalling.