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AIBU?

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AIBU to feel annoyed after a mum's sarcastic supermarket comment?

231 replies

Msidontknow · 15/08/2026 17:23

In a local supermarket getting some bits - it's quiet and I'm taking my time. I come around to turn into the other isle and a young toddler age 2-3 is waiting/hanging around making it difficult for me to move. I wait for him to see me to move - I don't say anything or do anything as I'm not in a rush and he was just being a child - the mum sees me waiting, calls him over and says loudly 'he's not a mind reader'. I was taken back and lost my chance to respond which would've sounded something like ' I'm sorry for not rushing your son and waiting patiently for him to see me'.

The thought did cross my mind would she have said this if I was a different ethnicity?

Maybe it's the heat or the rudeness but I'm annoyed at the sarky comment towards me for just trying to be nice.

OP posts:
Suntherebutnotthere · 15/08/2026 17:51

We just say "excuse me" to small kids. They look up, move. Doesn't happen often but nor me nor DH will just silently stare at kids around. It can be said nicely so they don't get spooked

bunnypenny · 15/08/2026 17:51

Msidontknow · 15/08/2026 17:39

I wonder if I had been the same ethnicity would she have made the same remarks or would she have just been kinder. If that is a thought or concept that is so alien to you then you are obviously very lucky. 🙂

Are you prone to over thinking situations? It’s so odd that you are giving an innocuous comment in a supermarket any further thought and somehow linking it to racism. To be “annoyed” is weirder still.

Msidontknow · 15/08/2026 17:50

Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:48

The woman was a bit curt

If you are going to see racism in every exchange like this… then your life is going to be a pretty damn miserable one

I've lived many years seeing the way I do the world and I don't often wonder if unpleasant experiences are to do with my ethnicity - however today I did wonder. Not sure what made me think of that. But we are where we are.

OP posts:
Kangarude · 15/08/2026 17:50

As a black person, never in a million years would it have crossed my mind that this could be anything to do with ‘ethnicity’. Have I missed something here? Confused

ClarissaImissHer · 15/08/2026 17:50

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Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:48

The woman was a bit curt

If you are going to see racism in every exchange like this… then your life is going to be a pretty damn miserable one

Msidontknow · 15/08/2026 17:47

The child was NOT obese, the aisle was at the corner where the self checkout queue starts too so an awkward angle.

OP posts:
DriveVerySlowlyPastNumber23IWantThemToSeeMyHat · 15/08/2026 17:46

'Neither am I. I was wondering which way he was going!'

Msidontknow · 15/08/2026 17:45

Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:45

Are you responding to Me or the op?!

I think it's directed at me.

OP posts:
Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:45

This reply has been deleted

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Are you responding to Me or the op?!

NervousSheepy · 15/08/2026 17:43

People can just be a bit rude sometimes. A lady in the supermarket once stopped me and asked why I was buying baby food for dd as it was really terrible and I should be making my own. I should have just not bothered to reply, but for some reason felt I needed to explain that I usually did, but that it was a one off for a very long haul flight we were taking. She quickly backtracked, not that it was any of her business. Try to just forget about it if you can.

ClarissaImissHer · 15/08/2026 17:42

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Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:40

Msidontknow · 15/08/2026 17:39

I wonder if I had been the same ethnicity would she have made the same remarks or would she have just been kinder. If that is a thought or concept that is so alien to you then you are obviously very lucky. 🙂

So are you suggesting she was a racist?

WerewolfOfLoudon · 15/08/2026 17:40

Why didn’t you just say excuse me? I'd have considered you rude for just standing there expecting a child to magically move too.

WhatFlavourIsIt · 15/08/2026 17:39

I have to admit, I do find it really irritating when someone just stands there waiting for you to move and doesn't just say excuse me and I might make a PA comment.

Msidontknow · 15/08/2026 17:39

I wonder if I had been the same ethnicity would she have made the same remarks or would she have just been kinder. If that is a thought or concept that is so alien to you then you are obviously very lucky. 🙂

OP posts:
Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:38

Floatlikeafeather2 · 15/08/2026 17:31

What a bizarre comment. It doesn't even make sense.

Mine or the OP’s?!

Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:38

Soontobe60 · 15/08/2026 17:36

How narrow are the aisles in this supermarket that you couldn’t get past a toddler???

Good point

or is the drip that the toddler was morbidly obese

Katypp · 15/08/2026 17:38

I think people can be oblivious to the issues their children cause and are embarrassed when they realise.
I had a situation recently when a grandma thought a M&S self-serve click&collect machine was an excellent place to teach her grandaughter the alphabet and numbers.
Being charitable, it may have been empty when she started but by the time she finished (Sat afternoon) quite a queue had built up and i had been pushed forward by people trying not to block the aisle.
They finished, turned round and she harrumphed 'I don't think you need to stand THAT close!' to me, then continued to stage whisper to the toddler about rude people. I ignored her.
I've also been at the receiving end of a 'gentle' mum telling her toddler their family wasn't rude like us for a 30 minute walk back to the car park after my autistic daughter waited for 10 mins for her child to move from making daisy chains at the top of the slide. We had to suffer a long monotone of how people should be patient and not bully others all the way back. I ignored her too.

Soontobe60 · 15/08/2026 17:36

How narrow are the aisles in this supermarket that you couldn’t get past a toddler???

Floatlikeafeather2 · 15/08/2026 17:31

Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:27

The thought did cross my mind would she have said this if I was a different ethnicity?

WTF are you going to on on about? Are certain ethnicities know for their mind reading skills?

What a bizarre comment. It doesn't even make sense.

Kingdomofsleep · 15/08/2026 17:31

She's in a grumpy mood because she's got a toddler and day-to-day activities are much harder with a toddler in tow. It is not personal to you, she'd probably have been snappy with anyone.

I think it's generally best to assume your ethnicity has nothing to do with anything unless it's clear that it is - for the sake of your own peace of mind.

Herenowatbroad · 15/08/2026 17:30

BIWI · 15/08/2026 17:28

The thought did cross my mind would she have said this if I was a different ethnicity?

WTAF?

I know

who knew certain ethnicities may have mind reading skills and some may not

Floatlikeafeather2 · 15/08/2026 17:29

HoppityBun · 15/08/2026 17:24

She probably just felt a bit embarrassed that he’d got in the way. You could just have smiled and said “no problem “

If she was embarrassed, she would have said sorry when she called him away. She was being rude and snarky and probably OP was best off not engaging with her at all. Those sort of people are all over the place and not worth wasting time on. She very probably thought she was being very clever.

BIWI · 15/08/2026 17:28

The thought did cross my mind would she have said this if I was a different ethnicity?

WTAF?