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Original poster

Popping to the shop - which makes more sense?

144 replies

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 15/08/2026 10:43

Am I going insane??

Two adults.

One is cycling in to the local high street for a coffee with child. Coffee spot literally across the street from M&S.

One is driving in to the same town centre to drop off a child at the library, will not be getting out of the car, but because of the layout of the road will have to drive past the back of the same M&S.

one adult suggests to the other that they pop in and pick up some rolls and cold cuts for lunch, as they will be feet away from the shop, bikes already chained up.

the cycling adult says they think the other adult should do it, they are driving right past it. Driving adult explains they have no intention of getting out of the car, so it would add on a car parking space faff/fee.

they’ve reached an impasse, as both adults think it makes more sense for the other to go.

thoughts please?

OP posts:
RappelChoan · 15/08/2026 12:18

Whichever adult is normally the laziest when it comes to planning, buying and making family meals should do it.

When I was married the responsibility of continually feeding people really ground me down. Then ex would do some sort of glory meal making core memories and all that shit. I used to have a secret curly wurly in Tesco car park just to get me through the days.

Now I am dating a nice fellow adult and in this scenario either of us would happily do it.

Asunciondelaflata · 15/08/2026 12:08

My thoughts are; why are two adults arguing about something so petty?

ChocolateCinderToffee · 15/08/2026 12:08

BillieWiper · 15/08/2026 10:57

'Cold cuts' from M&S? I've never heard anyone in the UK calling deli meat/sandwich fillings that. Are you American?

Sorry it matters not much! I think maybe the cycler should get the stuff. The driver isn't getting out of the car and parking would be extra faff/cost but the cyclist is already going to the high street to actually use it. And M&S is kind of part of that trip. Before or after the coffee.

And the child might like to go too? Or at least they might like treat from there. But I guess that goes for either child.

I call them cold cuts and I'm English.

Morepositivemum · 15/08/2026 12:06

Honestly either or! I’d err towards the driver because carrying on a bike once sent me into a bush😅😅😅

Thisismyfinesthour · 15/08/2026 12:04

First world problem.

Kidsandhouse · 15/08/2026 12:02

You should have added a poll...

🤣

Roastiesplease · 15/08/2026 12:00

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 15/08/2026 11:46

Ah, but child is in town for a few hours, so lunch time will have been and gone.

cyclist has returned, cold cuts still sat in fridge at M&S.

driver is leaving to drop child off now, ball is in their court it would seem

Edited
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Can lazy cyclist be dropped off to go into shop? Then you don't have to park..

Doggymummar · 15/08/2026 11:59

Library kid, already out the car and has a book bag

BillieWiper · 15/08/2026 11:58

concertinacornflake · 15/08/2026 10:59

Cold cuts is fine!

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Haha. Yeah I'm not saying it's not. I've just not heard it in the UK before.

hollyblueivy · 15/08/2026 11:56

Bike

Undercoverpepsicola · 15/08/2026 11:56

LennyLenses · 15/08/2026 11:48

Whoever said they wanted lunch from M&S should pick up lunch from M&S.

Otherwise have egg on toast.

This is the correct answer. Whoever wants it has the responsibility to get it

WerewolfOfLoudon · 15/08/2026 11:55

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 15/08/2026 11:46

Ah, but child is in town for a few hours, so lunch time will have been and gone.

cyclist has returned, cold cuts still sat in fridge at M&S.

driver is leaving to drop child off now, ball is in their court it would seem

Edited
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Have lunch while you're out, let the cyclist feed himself and the other child.

LejlaKapovic · 15/08/2026 11:55

thoughts please?
I think if both adults are going to be near the vicinity of the supermarket, the adult suggesting the shopping should actually do the shopping. I don't think "haven't planned to get out of the car" is a valid excuse - it's not that hard to park your car, open the door and get out of your car. So, do it.

But, there are many factors that would make me not want to do the shopping even though it was my suggestion. If I'm always the one having to come up with lunch ideas and provide the lunch, I'd think it's fair for the other person to do this small thing. Or, if there were other things to eat in the house, and neither of us wanted to go to the supermarket, I'd just have what is available at home.

Or, if I'm particularly petty, only buy lunch for myself and my kids. But I'd only do this if my partner is overall a selfish person who never does anything, but takes a lot from me. But then again, I'd just dump him if that's what he was like, so...

TimeFlysWhenYoureHavingRum · 15/08/2026 11:49

Order a pizza.

hyggetyggedotorg · 15/08/2026 11:49

Shinyhappyapple · 15/08/2026 11:16

I think it’s odd you would cycle into a town centre to have a cup of coffee with someone you live with TBH.

Edited

I’m thinking of it more as a bike ride for some exercise/activity & the coffee shop has been chosen as a place to cycle too, rather than people needing to leave the house for a coffee.

To answer the OP. Either could easily do it. I would usually say the one with the car should get the shopping but if they’re going to struggle to park anywhere near, then maybe the cyclist should.

LennyLenses · 15/08/2026 11:48

Whoever said they wanted lunch from M&S should pick up lunch from M&S.

Otherwise have egg on toast.

fishfingergermanbight · 15/08/2026 11:48

Biker should go

Slightyamusedandsilly · 15/08/2026 11:48

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 15/08/2026 11:46

Ah, but child is in town for a few hours, so lunch time will have been and gone.

cyclist has returned, cold cuts still sat in fridge at M&S.

driver is leaving to drop child off now, ball is in their court it would seem

Edited
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I'd just have a liquid lunch to avoid any of the palaver in that case.

TheOnlyOneWho · 15/08/2026 11:47

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 15/08/2026 11:23

This is actually the most sensible thing I’ve read so far this summer.

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Obv I should have suggested aperol spritz given username, but idea still stands!

MelonSorbet · 15/08/2026 11:47

Just tell your husband to buy the lunch stuff once he's finished his coffee.

redskyAtNigh · 15/08/2026 11:47

the driver is BU to drive if it's close enough to cycle (particularly if the other parent is going to basically the same place anyway).

Although taking things home on a bike, particularly things that should be kept refrigerated when it's a hot day, is a PITA.

PensionPTake · 15/08/2026 11:46

DeanGaffneysCumFace · 15/08/2026 10:46

Is the bike made out of disposable BBQ's?

A hot car exhaust is clearly more of a fire risk than a bike. The cyclist should go in so you can get home asap and avoid burning down the entire city centre with your recklessness 🤣

InterestedDad37 · 15/08/2026 11:46

I've got the perfect solution - the driver cycles the cold cuts to the library, and the child has lunch there while the adults have a coffee!

Original poster
aperolspritzbasicbitch · 15/08/2026 11:46

Slightyamusedandsilly · 15/08/2026 11:43

Car driver should give the child the money and a list. The child is already out and about and can do a quick shop. Car driver can send them back in again at pick up when they get it wrong.

Edited
Show quote history

Ah, but child is in town for a few hours, so lunch time will have been and gone.

cyclist has returned, cold cuts still sat in fridge at M&S.

driver is leaving to drop child off now, ball is in their court it would seem

OP posts:
Slightyamusedandsilly · 15/08/2026 11:43

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 15/08/2026 10:56

shopping to carry would be minimal, and light, and cyclist has previously popped a lot more shopping in a bag and cycled home with it, so that’s not really a huge issue.

driver manages to both spend time with the children and pick up supplies just fine.

other child will call when finished in town, and will be collected, by driver, no doubt.

Car driver should give the child the money and a list. The child is already out and about and can do a quick shop. Car driver can send them back in again at pick up when they get it wrong.