AIBU to think my toddler should have had a snack in 4 1/2 visit to grandparents?

2.30 is late though and doesn’t fit in with most schedules for young dc. It’s best not to snack but that requires regular meals. My DD did have a snack after school when she got to about 7 as they had lunch at 12 ish. So she needed a top up. Dinner was then about 6.30. No morning snack needed. I just think grandparents should stick to the routine set up by the parent - it’s not that difficult.

So you’re DS are a decent (late) lunch, you fit your hair cut and your parents serpent time with their DGC. That sounds a very nice day.

I would say almost everyone in the UK has lunch between 12pn and 2pm so i think he should have been given lunch during his visit. Maybe take a packed lunch to have if you think they may difficult about this. And say what he should have it.

People complain about toddlers not eating the right thing but let them graze and fill them up on snacks. Honestly I think they did the right thing. Let hunger build up then your child ate well. As long as he wasn’t upset?!

@Mooselander When were mealtimes? Lunch at 2.30? Did they said that long with no food from breakfast to 2.30? I bet not. I wasn’t a great one for snacks but I fed meals at regular and sensible intervals.

This is complete nonsense. Toddlers have smaller stomachs they cannot eat enough in a large meals to fulfil their nutritional needs, they need to eat more often than an adult (as do all young animals) They also use up their fuel more quickly as they have bursts of high energy. They are growing fast they have different nutritional needs from an adult or older child. Three meals a day and nothing in between is an adult diet not a small child's.

the idea that snacks are unhealthy is ludicrous, people associate the word snack with 'junk food'. A snack can be an apple/ orange/ some berries/ carrot sticks and hummous, oatcakes, cubes of cheese or meat, hard boiled egg etc etc.

Toddlers also need more fats and carbs for growth.

Not feeding a toddler lunch until 2.30, and offering nothing else to keep him going is utterly self absorbed and ignorant. I hope at least she managed to give him plenty to drink in this hot weather.

Really?

The OP knew very well what her mum is like and should have been the one to say ‘please feed him lunch at such and such a time’.

YABU. Snacks are not necessary for toddlers, and quite honestly it’s better if they don’t eat them because then they actually eat at mealtimes.

I’ve never given snacks to my kids.

Its a bit inconsiderate of her but give him a bigger breakfast like eggs that will keep him fuller for longer and give him a snack just before he goes in. Or just tell her!

I don't think he needed a snack at those times but agree he needed an earlier lunch

I really wouldn't be happy with this.
I think if your mum cannot adjust and feed him a snack as asked, then it's best he is not left in her care.

I know this has upset you and I do understand why. My mother was exactly the same and we later realised anorexic. She didnt feel hungry so no one else was. When my children were young I used to pack food and tell her a time. I wouldnt really worry getting hungry is a good thing we are all so programmed about food many adults never have normal eating signals. She looked after my kids for years and they still remember her Sunday roast which by the time she had cooked arrived anytime between 4 pm and 8pm nothing serious happened.

I'm of the generation when my mother was advised to feed her babies every 4 hours as new borns, with advice to leave the baby to cry if it wasn't time for a feed.

Yes it is not ideal, if there is a next time make sure your DS has some snacks and a drink and make sure your DM knows that t 12.00 he needs a snack, phone her to remind her if you have to.

My grandson 2 will ask for a snack - I have toddler snacks available - how old is your child ?

Was he hungry?

He’ll be and was fine no wonder there such a massive amount of over overweight kids
they don’t need snack just 3 good meals

I would expect a toddler to have lunch or at least a snack before 2.30 but you said she doesn't have him regularly, maybe she just found it more full on than she expected and didn't get round to sorting lunch until then or perhaps like you say she didn't feel hungary herself and isn't used to normal mealtimes so it just didn't cross her mind until your son started to show he was hungry. No big deal really

It was an exception to your and his usual routine.

he didn’t miss an essential medication.

he missed a snack.

no one died. He was hungry and hoovered up a late lunch.

really wouldn’t spend too much energy thinking about this

kids adapt to different circumstances. He survived. No drama.

Pre prepare snacks and tell your DM hell have it after 2 hrs in-between lunch.

YABU because you grew up with her weird food ways so you should have known better than to presume.

Same reasons I think parents feel the need to sign kods up to a milliom activities from the time they can walk they play to this weird guilt thing or dont want bored kids

Don’t worry about offending your mum. Just pack him a lunch. My mum and my MIL will always have some snacks or fruit in but always pack her food. My daughter has AFFRID so I do get it’s a bit different, but I did this when she was younger also, and she ate a large variety.

@Craftycariad What! Feeding a dc regularly gives dc food issues? Of course it doesn’t. It’s good practice to have three main meals a day and dc do
eat lunch before 2.30 in every processional setting you can think of. Thry don’t wait until 2.30 and why should they have to cry or whine because they are hungry? How bizarre to think that’s great for anyone. This child should have had lunch between 12.30 and 1 and only later if mum said ok. It’s the grandma who is wrong and rigid. The child is only with her for a few hours, so how difficult was it to feed him at a normal time?

Yes thats far too long for him to wait. What was she thinking!

You’ve made a mistake of posting on Mumsnet OP, as most posters are vehemently anti-snack. Ignoring the fact that young kids have smaller stomachs and need feeding more frequently, whether it’s a snack or a sensible mealtime.

I remember being starving at times, as on a Sunday it was expected we would wait until lunch (no snacks!) which would be mid to late afternoon. I would be so hungry I would massively overeat and feel rough for the rest of the day. As an adult, I physically cannot eat enough to last more than a few hours, so snacking is what prevents my BMI from getting too low.