To want to uninvite this man?

Then do you plan to remain in the club? Or attempt to have him ejected?

My MIL once sent me 'Sorry the cat died LOL'
She thought it meant 'lots of love'.
Older people can be genuinely clueless about emojis and text speak.
I wouldn't worry about it, loads of people are talking about that film.

I said he looked like it...not her actual gf..he looked like an old man and she looked young and active

My mil would. Without a drink too! 🤣 It’s why she doesn’t have my number.

I am relieved to hear this and I hope you don't take offence at my having queried that - I was clearly identifying from my own past experiences - but I'd always rather ask the question and be told no, that's not something you have to worry about - than not mention it....

As your unease is based purely on your own instincts then perhaps you should uninvite him - your feelings are your feelings, and only you know how uncomfortable you felt recieving that text, how uncomfortable you will feel going forwards.

My own feeling with things like this is that one attempt at flirtation is OK - even if it's someone you view as totally unattractive, he probably doesn't see himself like that. And though many people are put off by a large age gap, others aren't. (My mother-in-law for example had a nearly 30 year gap with her husband, and remained in love with him till he sadly passed a couple of years ago). So I don't think age gap relationships are by definition creepy, though it's fair enough that you are personally repulsed by the idea of you yourself having one.

But in a way, the guy doesn't have to have done anything "wrong" for you to decide that you can no longer be in his presence.

I would just suggest, if you do go down the 'uninviting" route, do it gently. I don't think the guy has done anything bad enough to warrant total humiliation, for example. And, except in situations where we are abused or otherwise mistreated, I think we should be kind whenever possible. (It is always possible).

He randomly sent a film rec, with a winking face and said he'd had a few drinks.. why say that last part if not to explain poor behaviour? He was definitely flirting. Maybe he didn't grasp that the private invite was just because he wasn't in a bigger, group chat or hadn't been at group when others invited. Older people don't always understand texts / communication through devices.

I'd find an opportunity to make a joke in earshot about some 'old man' who once tried to flirt with a friend and how embarrassing it was for her or maybe you disapprove of a celebrity's relationship with a large age gap - just loud enough for him to hear.

I hate men like this with a passion. Not really, because I understand they just haven't mentally aged / emotionally aged, but I find it frustrating. It's one thing to pursue a relationship after 'stumbling into it' from spending time with a friend and getting to know each other and finding romantic feelings.. but a 60 yr old actively pursuing a 30 yr old, with no prior connection, reeks of entitlement and immaturity. Why would you ever assume someone half your age would be interested in you sexually? It's fucking weird. It's also pervy. The fact that his first thought wasn't to treat a 30 yr old woman like his daughter (or granddaughter) says a lot about him.

I could see myself dating a guy who was 60 and knew it. So meaning he was creeped out by me liking him (ahahaha) but a guy who mentally never aged enough to understand why that's creepy? Just wouldn't be attracted to that type of mindset. Urgh.

Maybe he doesn’t have any. There are other people coming, I wouldn’t be bothered by this. I’ve accidently sent ‘xx’ to people, who have laughed thankfully. I’d be mortified if they thought I was being flirty.

It's pretty insulting to assume that someone in their 60s is incapable of noticing any societal change over a 40-year period

No-one who hits on someone young enough to be their child deserves a gentle rebuff

Op you are making a song and dance about it though

If you're positive he was flirting why did you make a post asking if it was innocuous and then shoot down anyone who says it may have been?
I do think he was probably flirting but don't understand why you started off with faux naivety

@Healthyalltheway "But 60 ish year old FIL sends all sorts of random emojis sometimes"

Does he send them to 30 year old women that he barely knows though?

I have male colleague with a similar age difference, so not much older than my eldest son. I never so much as put a small x a wink or anything at all that could be ambiguous in any way.
Men consistently mislead themselves if they think a woman might just be interested. As an example my early twenties son was asked by a male colleague if " x (female colleague) might fancy him as she (wait for it) smiled at him" my son (os gay) replied flatly " she smiles at me everyday!, so no I wouldn't read to much into it!
Practise your resting bitch face OP ! I'm with your DP on this one ( he's a man, so definitely worth listening to!)

Suxty year old do tend to know what a winking emoji means fgs

but you must feel sorry for him Roaring111111

see men just can't help but put their feelings first, they shouldn't have to think about how others might feel. Really you should do the same and stop being a silly little woman who doesn't know her place

The message from some is coming over very loud and clear

He's hardly going to go from a random winky message to jumping you in your home

You did actually send a man twice your age an invite to a drinks party (out of the blue), he may have misinterpreted your intentions and taken it more as a personal invite rather than an invite just as part of the group. And I would definitely mention your DP when you talk to him and make sure he realises the whole group were invited.

He’s in his 60s, when he learnt to date it was perfectly accepted for an older man to come on to someone half their age. Frankly I’d much rather receive a respectful civil approach from a much older man that can be easily dealt with politely, rather than a a dick pic and a bunch of crude messages from a man 30 years younger, which is what often happens to women in their 60s on social media. You’re over-reacting.

Doesn't sound flirty to me.