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AIBU?

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AIBU to feel cross at online school and autistic daughter over A level results?

206 replies

hurtandconflicted · 11/08/2026 18:00

We were expecting to get the results on Thursday and I had booked a day off to celebrate. However we got the results this morning and they are not great.
Late diagnosis after she started at college and just could not cope so we agreed that she leave in May and then wait to start her A levels online. No financial support from the LA and no EHCP.
At first things were going great and in her mocks she was predicted three A’s. But she took her foot off the gas, not burnt out, just not got herself into a good routine and due to her demand avoidance I resisted being too demanding of her.
We have spent approximately £20,000 on her education and she has come out with B,C and a D. I can’t decide who I am most cross with, school for sending the results on the wrong day or DD for not knuckling down.
Im hoping that someone can talk me out of feeling like this!

OP posts:
Seeline · 11/08/2026 18:07

HumberSquid · 11/08/2026 18:05

How come you know her A level results today? They dont come out til Thursday.

Edited

International A levels (Cambridge) were out today. Quite possible an online school would use those.

MiddleAgedDread · 11/08/2026 18:07

HumberSquid · 11/08/2026 18:05

How come you know her A level results today? They dont come out til Thursday.

Edited

Schools get them in advance

somanychristmaslights · 11/08/2026 18:05

Well, what ultimately does she want to do for a career? Does it really matter the results? You can’t be angry at her, it’s her disability.

HumberSquid · 11/08/2026 18:05

How come you know her A level results today? They dont come out til Thursday.

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 11/08/2026 18:04

Surely you would have been more annoyed with the results on the big day off, if that’s how you feel?

It could just be her level, it could be that she took her foot off the gas. Either way, being annoyed isn’t going to change much. My DC are at independent school, but this doesn’t buy you specific grades.

WeddingDressguest · 11/08/2026 18:03

She has a disability. If she took her foot off the gas and was PDA why didnt you just pull her out and let her do them when ready.

I feel quite sorry for her.