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AIBU?

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Original poster

Seeing my friend back in her relationship makes me sick

30 replies

Chachaslide1 · 10/08/2026 19:51

My friend has got back with her boyfriend. He is a horrible man. He's beat her up, he’s called her every disrespectful thing he can and restricts what she can do. She’s got back with him and sends me picks of them holding hands or tries to talk to me about him. She’s even brought him out to say hi to me.

Everything about him makes me sick and I don’t know why she keeps trying to force him onto me too.

I’ve told her in a nice beat around the bush way that I don’t want to know. But she’s continuing.

Has anyone got any advice? It’s making me want to stay away from her as she keep talking about him

OP posts:
TisEye · 10/08/2026 20:44

Chachaslide1 · 10/08/2026 20:08

It’s so horrible I feel like I’m on the emotional roller coaster with them. It’s like she was at mine and spent the whole time arguing then pleading with him on the phone and then the next day I get a picture of them in ‘love’

Then you need to get off the roller coaster for your own wellbeing.

Tell her you've been here before, you know how this story ends and it was painful enough at watch the first time.

Out of interest is she a good friend to you while she's with this awful man? Does she listen to your worries and help you out, or is it all about her drama?

MrsTerryPratchett · 10/08/2026 20:23

Be honest. You love her. You want the best for.her. You will not have contact with a violent criminal.

And whenever she's ready to leave you will be there.

Then be consistent.

Original poster
Chachaslide1 · 10/08/2026 20:08

It’s so horrible I feel like I’m on the emotional roller coaster with them. It’s like she was at mine and spent the whole time arguing then pleading with him on the phone and then the next day I get a picture of them in ‘love’

OP posts:
Apdjvt · 10/08/2026 20:03

I have this exact scenario and I find it really difficult; it also brings back my own experiences which is very hard. However I can’t completely step away as when she finally does leave I want to help her. I have stepped back in a lot of ways now though; I don’t respond with urgency to their ongoing arguments and if I’m not in the mood to hear about the latest issue I don’t see her

IronEverything · 10/08/2026 20:00

I'd be honest with her. Say you cannot support her being in this abusive relationship and you don't want to see or hear of him.

You'll only get dragged through the same cycle of picking her up when he beats her down, just for her to run back to him again. It's emotionally exhausting.