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Would you judge a middle aged quiet couple playing cards in a pub rather than bigly conversing?

145 replies

Fifteen2fifteen4 · 09/08/2026 20:09

We're mid Fifties, been married together forever.

We're playing cards in a hotel lobby which we always do when we're away. Always happily but we don't really chat much.

If you were sitting chattingin a couple or bubbly in a group across from us, would you judge?

I feel a bit self-conscious that we're don't look as though we're having a companionable time.

We go away 2 or 3 times a month to nice places but don't sit and chatter, just sit in lobbies and pubs in the evening and get cards or backgammon out.

Lynn, these are quiet people.

Aibu to feel jusged?

OP posts:
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Lomonald · 10/08/2026 19:26

BadLad · 10/08/2026 18:17

The best game ever.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shithead_(card_game)

Difficult to learn from reading - get someone who knows the game to teach you.

Brilliant fun.

Oh i call that caboodle im clearly to classy to call it shithead😀

Castolaya · 10/08/2026 19:05

My daughter and her friends all play cards in the pub. It is a big thing these days, that and board games. I think it is great.

BackOfTheMum5net · 10/08/2026 18:43

I’d judge you cute!

littlebigchicken · 10/08/2026 18:40

I’d be so jelly

mamajong · 10/08/2026 18:27

We also play cards and often have other people ask what we are playing and joining in. I think its fine. I try not to judge others but I do sometimes feel sad for couples just sat on their own phones but try to remember its nothing to do with me. Generally I pay little attention to what others are doing unless it impacts me so keep playing!

BadLad · 10/08/2026 18:26

I’ve always played that you can just pick up if you want but I did that a few days ago and my cousin stropped at me.

MyLeftArmpit · 10/08/2026 18:26

Do whatever you like.

QueenStevie · 10/08/2026 18:24

I think we have to play if we can, but we haven't been on holiday this year so I'd have to double check with DH 😂

BadLad · 10/08/2026 18:21

QueenStevie · 10/08/2026 18:15

Shithead is one of our favourite holiday card games too. I am shocking at remembering rules of games so I have to be re-taught the rules each holiday. DH has the patience of a saint.

Do you have the rule that you have to play if you can? Or can you pick up the pile if you want to?

lmnabc · 10/08/2026 18:20

I’d be envious of you

Princessblackberry · 10/08/2026 18:17

If I thought anything it would just be that it looks like you two are enjoying something together and that's always lovely.

BadLad · 10/08/2026 18:17

Lomonald · 10/08/2026 12:47

Playing whatnow?

The best game ever.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shithead_(card_game)

Difficult to learn from reading - get someone who knows the game to teach you.

Brilliant fun.

Shithead (card game) - Wikipedia

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shithead_(card_game)

QueenStevie · 10/08/2026 18:15

Shithead is one of our favourite holiday card games too. I am shocking at remembering rules of games so I have to be re-taught the rules each holiday. DH has the patience of a saint.

QueenStevie · 10/08/2026 18:14

We always take games on holiday with us and chose one to take down with us to play in the evening over a few drinks. When DD was younger and we had more 'kid friendly' games, we often had other children wanting to join us too.

Funnily enough, DH and I have been out to a garden centre today and stopped for a coffee in the cafe. An older couple were sitting together at a table with their drinks, each reading their own books and DH commented how that looked like a lovely retirement plan.

Fifteen2fifteen4 · 10/08/2026 17:34

Okay buoyed by your reassurances we're proudly playing with a view today 💞

Would you judge a middle aged quiet couple playing cards in a pub rather than bigly conversing?
OP posts:
Lomonald · 10/08/2026 12:47

titchy · 10/08/2026 12:39

We’re on holidays with our 20-something DCs plus partners - they’re currently playing shithead!

Playing whatnow?

titchy · 10/08/2026 12:39

We’re on holidays with our 20-something DCs plus partners - they’re currently playing shithead!

squeaver · 10/08/2026 12:21

This is so much better than seeing middle-aged couples staring blankly into space without a word to say to each other!

Doodledoggle · 10/08/2026 12:20

DH and I take cards on holiday and sometimes play in bars before dinner with a stonker G&T.

We also take scrabble on holiday. I really enjoy it!

I wouldn't judge.
We are 48

Lomonald · 10/08/2026 12:20

Fifteen2fifteen4 · 09/08/2026 20:09

We're mid Fifties, been married together forever.

We're playing cards in a hotel lobby which we always do when we're away. Always happily but we don't really chat much.

If you were sitting chattingin a couple or bubbly in a group across from us, would you judge?

I feel a bit self-conscious that we're don't look as though we're having a companionable time.

We go away 2 or 3 times a month to nice places but don't sit and chatter, just sit in lobbies and pubs in the evening and get cards or backgammon out.

Lynn, these are quiet people.

Aibu to feel jusged?

We do this on Holiday or away from home, we are the same age, last year In Spain we saw a group spainish pensioners in a card school.every night after dinner. They took it very seriously 😀

Shoxfordian · 10/08/2026 12:18

I don't care at all what you're doing op - most people think much less about you and your behaviours than you think so carry on, it sounds like you have a really happy relationship

ifonly4 · 10/08/2026 12:16

We can't judge. We're 59 and 61, and can often be found playing cards, dominoes, rummykub. We're normally chatting away, but as long as you're happy that's fine. You're actually engaging with eachother anyway, which is more than some people do if they're each on their mobiles, or others you just see sat there looking into space with nothing to say.

Bleachedjeans · 10/08/2026 12:15

‘bigly conversing’ 🙄

Oldmamabear · 10/08/2026 12:11

They would have to be watching you for a certain amount of time to even form an unwanted nothing to do with them opinion. I'd be more concerned about what the motive was for watching and forming an opinion was cos most people are busy doing their own thing....

Velumental · 10/08/2026 09:19

Teeheehee1579 · 09/08/2026 20:20

We are on holiday albeit with our 3 kids and at every meal/bar we have had uno out and have a libely competition going. SO many tables with couples or families on their phones for the vast majority - that I do notice. You playing cards I would think what fun if anything!

Dobble is our family go to