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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU not to take DS2 to a family party?

110 replies

Robin781 · 09/08/2026 14:05

DS2 is 9mo. Hardly any of my extended family have been to visit us/see him since he was born. When DS1 was 4mo, we had a ‘welcome to the world’ type party at our expense, where close friends, immediate and extended family were invited for a full meal and met DS1. However, a lot of the same friends and family also came home to visit us and meet him before or after. We are attending a ‘big birthday’ party next weekend for an extended family member. AIBU to not want to take DS2 to this - for extended family to meet him for the first time - when they haven’t made the effort to check in or come and see us after he was born? No backstory, it just feels like people just haven’t made the effort. We have made the effort to visit elderly relatives with him who may not have been able to come and see us otherwise.

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 11/08/2026 06:57

So you did a welcome dc1 party but not to dc2 - but also pissed off that people didn’t come and meet no 2

maybe as you didn’t do a meet him party people thought you didn’t want them over

to not take him to meet people when have a chance is petty

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 11/08/2026 06:56

You don’t get the fanfare for the second child.

Why do you need it?

No one will care if you don’t take them, all you’ll do is isolate your child from their family.

EnglishRose26 · 11/08/2026 06:55

And the welcome to the world party with a 'full meal' sounds insufferable when he is 9 months old and all of the family had met dS1. Very bizarre.

You sound like a nightmare op tbh. The whole world is not revolving you and your offspring.

EnglishRose26 · 11/08/2026 06:53

Silly and attention seeking.
No one will notice or care if your ds is not there op, it is someone else's event.
Heavens above. Self absorption to a whole new level.

Mere1 · 11/08/2026 06:26

thistimelastweek · 09/08/2026 14:13

I'm not quite sure what you're hoping to achieve.
Is your son's absence intended to convey message? If so, I doubt it will have any effect.

Agree.

Copperoliverbear · 09/08/2026 23:48

I’m afraid I think most people are excited for your first but not as excited with subsequent children

LaurieFairyCake · 09/08/2026 23:09

Batshit idea, no one is interested in your second baby.

if you wanted them to come you should have thrown a second party. Even you don’t care about your second kid as much as you didn’t throw a party 😬

Kipperandarthur · 09/08/2026 23:00

How old are you as you sound exceedingly juvenile?

MoveOnTheCards · 09/08/2026 22:51

Christ you sound petty.

I doubt many would be arsed if you don’t take the baby.

if it’s that important to you that family come and worship at the temple of baby, why didn’t you do one of your ‘welcome to the world’ parties for DC2?

lizzyBennet08 · 09/08/2026 18:24

Honestly they won't give a toss about not seeing her if you're thinking is that you wilp
"punish' them by not bringing her. I'm sure post of them would be delighted that there is one less baby there to make noise

saraclara · 09/08/2026 18:09

This is right up there for the pettiest behaviour I've seen on Mumsnet. I can only hope they it's a troll, rather than a person who actually thinks this way.

feistyoneyouare · 09/08/2026 18:03

Sorry but the world doesn’t revolve around your children.

Imightbeinthewronghere · 09/08/2026 17:52

Robin781 · 09/08/2026 14:10

We would attend with DS1, DS2 would stay at home with DGPs

Edited
Show quote history

For goodness sake, grow up!

Your child is not the centre of everyone's universe.

Astra53 · 09/08/2026 17:50

BeSharpHelper · 09/08/2026 15:07

9 month old babies dont bring much to a party so Id be ok with it . Unless he’s going to rock up
with a case of Stella and and some sizzle steaks ?

🤣

Wingingit73 · 09/08/2026 17:41

Very petty. People are busy and you really have no idea what their priorities are. It is not always about younim afraid

Likeiloveyou · 09/08/2026 17:14

MerryUmberHedgehog · 09/08/2026 16:33

Doubt anyone would be bothered and if they ask where he is what are you going to say "we didnt bring him because no one came to see him when he was born?"

Please do this and report back!

itsgettingweird · 09/08/2026 16:37

Don’t take a 9mo baby because it’s easier not too and you can relax more.

But it’s extremely petty to leave your baby to spite others.

No one is ever as interested in your children as you are. You’re in for a difficult life if you expect differently.

MerryUmberHedgehog · 09/08/2026 16:33

Doubt anyone would be bothered and if they ask where he is what are you going to say "we didnt bring him because no one came to see him when he was born?"

MsSquiz · 09/08/2026 16:21

Maybe they’ve been waiting for you to have a party for DS2 like you did for DS1?

I honestly don’t understand the thought process behind leaving him at home and you all attending a party? He’s 9 months, won’t have a clue what’s going on, family will think you’re being weird and DS1 will be confused why is brother isn’t coming…

IPM · 09/08/2026 16:06

Or you could attend but make him wear a blanket on his head at all times.

It was good enough for Michael Jackson.

IPM · 09/08/2026 16:04

Good lord OP, seriously?

Your baby is important to you, but he's not the Messiah.

He's just another family baby to them which is nice, but not essential they meet him.

Cherrysoup · 09/08/2026 15:44

Petty. Immature. Nobody will notice or care.

TheBlueKoala · 09/08/2026 15:34

@Robin781 If you want to bring him then do, if not don't. I doubt anyone will care either way so don't overthink and try to make a statement that noone will get.

Cooshawn · 09/08/2026 15:34

Also, what fresh fucking hell is a welcome to the world party? And why to fucking god do you make a point of saying you held it at your expense? Of course it's at your expense. Or do you think your friends and family should be so eager/desperate to meet your baby that they'd gladly pay for the privilege?

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 09/08/2026 15:33

Welcome to the world party?! Have heard it all now. It’s not the second coming of the messiah for either of your offspring.