To think late 40’s is an odd age?

My periods stopped in my late 30s. I felt amazing in the early 40s, had loads of fun and looked amazing. I'm 47 now and suddenly feel old-ish. It has nothing to do with menopause - it's not the answer to everything.
I think getting old is weird, but I'm determined to make the best of it and keep having fun.

My experience is completely the opposite.

My children are now adults, so that probably helps.

I am now 50 and have been loving life for the last few years. I've been doing what I want, when I want. I've been seizing opportunities that come along. I've got a shed load of disposable income. I'm getting all ages of men and women commenting that I don't look my age

I just can't identify with late 40s being odd. I loved it. Surely it's what you make of it and what you choose to do in life.

My advice is to embrace life and enjoy to the max OP. Both now and in the future.

Yes. I have a weird feeling of dread, a cloud of misery, I’m usually a glass half full type of person.
It’s mainly there when I wake up in the morning.

I’m like @CrikeyMajikey, been diagnosed with angina but in my head I’m still about 15.

My school friends sister died at 17 when we were 15, made me realise that even the shit stuff, well Suzanne didn’t even get that experience. Then my DD died also on the brink of womanhood. Apart from sadness and anger it reinforced that life is for living, being maudlin is a disservice to those who didn’t get the chance.

I am a glass half full type and I think that’s how, when DD died though did have the biggest wobble of my life I made it through it.

The late 40s are indeed a strange time. I definitely had significant peri menopause symptoms from about 47 onwards and then went onto HRT at 49. Now at 53, I can look at old photos and feel happy for the times we had rather than feel desperate to go back. I’m far more settled in my skin now than I was 5 years ago.

I found my early forties really miserable. Marriage dying a slow death. Dealing with teenagers.

Late forties onwards (divorced) I really found myself again and felt like I was throwing myself back into the world with confidence.

Not just women and meno. it can affect men too.
When we were 47 and 49 our kids left home, Uni and RAF in the same September/October. It all felt very odd.

I spent my early 40s getting divorced and starting from 0 after a 20 year abusive relationship. It felt brilliant. Freeing and starting fresh. I’ve consequently felt young and grown up all at once during my forties.

Started HRT at 45 for the insomnia/anxiety/dread that were creeping in and it has been wholly positive.

Career has been excellent this decade. I’ll keep on doing inner work as I realise that’s where the real growth and freedom lies, especially as we experience the external world continuing to change.

I stay active as much as possible but I realise need to add weights to the yoga and walking.

Just back from a week away with my 3 late teen and twentysomething adult kids, treating them fully to a holiday, which was massively life-affirming.

And with all that said… I’ll be 48 this winter and I am commenting to say: I totally agree—the late 40s are proving to be a weird-arse time! Despite being an overwhelmingly positive decade it’s certainly a change to be navigated.

In my view the answer is within us, not outside in the world. Make friends with who you are and accept her and you won’t need that from the world as you age.

I get it. I'm 47. I started having peri-menopause symptoms at 41 shortly after treatment for breast cancer but since I stopped taking Tamoxifen last November, it feels like peri has kicked up a notch and I'm actually feeling old. It's hard to explain.

I'm feeling really tired today because I was up multiple times in the night and early for the day due to a heavy period.

I swim regularly, walk or cycle everywhere and eat a pretty healthy diet. But something's not working now. I wish I knew what.

I seem to have come out the other side of invisible (that was 45-47) at 48. I get compliments from strangers and dc regularly tell me their friends comment on how pretty I am (and how kind).
I’m working in the same career I’ve been in since my late 20s and seem to have now taken on the role of mentor/ agony aunt/ shoulder to cry on for colleagues aged 18-62. I probably feel part of something for the first time ever.
I do worry about what comes next though. I’ve no friends left (I had one proper friend, who died at 42) and dc are growing up: 2 have moved out, and the younger two are needing me less (or differently). I worry about loneliness in old age but I suppose that’s a bridge to be crossed later.
I am very keenly aware of time passing and wish I could hold on to now.

I'm 46 and feel like I've only just started living in the past few years. I have raised my son (mostly alone) to adulthood, started a degree, met a wonderful partner who finally 'gets' me, I feel mostly in control of my body and it is holding up OK although I haven't always treated it well.

My mum is very unwell and will never recover properly. She has a life but not one she would want. It is hard for her and us who are supporting her. I had my own minor health scare last year and just received news all is OK. I feel incredibly fortunate to be mostly in good health. Seeing what happened to my strong, capabale, busy mum has been an eye-opener and I have started to think about my future health more.

My periods are heavier at times, more painful and starting to be erratic. I have spoken to 2 nurses at my GP surgery in recent months who encouraged me to get started on HRT ASAP if I want it. I'm considering it now to get ahead of the game. I consider myself to be having moderate perimonopause symptoms.

One thing am I thankful for is still appearing relatively youthful, I've been very lucky genetically in that sense (or decades of moisturising 2x daily! 🤣). My son thinks I'm 'trendy', I am embracing carrot jeans after years of skinny jeans and yes, they do look much better on me. I love trainers, bags and jackets. I try keep up with haircuts. I have never worn make up in my life and don't intend to start. I love a variety of music and still like to go out even if I get fed up quicker and go home earlier, once I'm out I do love the buzz.

Of course, all this could change in the next few years but I hope not. We're all bloody fabulous anyway and I think us women really go through it at times. I admire all of you.

I'm 51 started HRT a couple of years ago but don't feel any different really. Though I'm not sure how I'd feel without it. I feel like the last decade has been an endless series of kicks by life, and now I'm on my own and it's all downhill from here. I am lonely but can't see myself ever going through the exhausting and ultimately heartbreaking business of trying to be in a relationship again, but my friends all have partners. I feel like a man will only ever trash my self esteem - both serious long term relationships I have ever had have ended like that, with them going off to be with younger better looking women, and treating me and the years we spent with one another meant absolutely nothing at all to them. I'm just done with it all.

The physical issues are cropping up and more than once a day I think "what will get me?"

So that was a cheerful post! Sorry

I think it''s an odd age because everyone is as such different stage in their life. Some friends will have a toddler, some friends are sending their kids to uni. Some friends have started a completely new life, retrained, change job and country, while others are semi-retired, sold their London (for example) home and relocated in a cheap area of the country

It's odd that within the same age group of friends you have babies and retirement

Oh I feel this. About to spend time in my uni town and theres sadness at what came of that girl with all those dreams but there's also a tiny bit of excitement and hope for future.

I quite often feel old, then have to kick myself and tell myself that I'm not. Except, I kind of am! I don't recover from injuries as far as I used to. I get tired - and I survived 8 years of non sleepers!

Cycle is getting shorter and lighter. I'm ready for hrt but don't think i need it just yet- but I'm scared that by the time I do, I'll already be miserable.

I'm 48 and don't feel like this. Life is what you make it. I'll be putting on my raving shoes in September, dancing to the music and djs I danced to 25+ years ago. I'm looking for a new job, I volunteer, I found my style. I'm not standing still.

Yes I ache more,have more grey hairs meaning I have to dye it more, and perimenopause has given me a belly that I never had but giving up and giving in isn't an option.

I started again at 40, I missed out on so much of my 20s and 30s because I was in an unhappy (to put it nicely) relationship. I'm not going to just fade into the background because society decided a woman over 45 is past it.

Growing old and getting to this age is a privilege that some of my friends didn't get.

“That nice old lady” is amazing 😭

I really don’t get why you would need HRT for feeling strange about aging. Adapting emotionally is part of the process even when it’s stressful and upsetting.

OP I relate so much! I’ve also found the nostalgia very strong. I find myself constantly listening to rave and dance from the 90s and dancing like a nutter. I also have so much enthusiasm for trying new things and getting fit and strong but it is both freeing and strange how noone notices!

I totally understand you.
I'm 49 and feel and act and sound like my grandmother! Yet in my mind I'm still the young woman who had a zest for life and ambitions and dreams.
I've gone from being noticed (in a nice way) in public to becoming totally invisible unless it's someone huffing and puffing at me in anger because my disability (which I never used to have) forces me to go slowly and although I always try to keep to my left to let people pass me, it's not always possible.

The local kids refer to me as "that nice old lady" and I feel as though I've lived my life and I've got nothing left to actually live for.

One area I find interesting but also tricky is trying to work out who I am at this age. My life went on pause to raise the kids, who though still need me are more independent and within the next 5 years will (hopefully) be at university.

So I’m thinking what do I want to do with my time. I work long hours but need some interests out of this. Not interested in gardening, or any crafty things. Like keeping fit but mostly running or weight training by myself.

So far I’ve started going to see live music more, which I love. But I need stuff to fill my time on a day to day basis that is not scrolling MN 🤣

I have had to do this.

was on hrt but had to come off due to breast cancer

Changing my diet and a few supplements, plus how I exercise is the only way I can cope with the side effects of tamoxifen and menopause

TBF the hrt didn’t help as much as over hauling diet and exercise has.

Am 50 soon

Some of it I think is a a post covid / too much tech world. Obviously we remember being young adults without mobile phones etc. It did feel a simpler life.

No, not at all. I had my last baby at 41, menopause at 42. A lot of people asked if it was my first....my oldest was 20
She made me a grandmother the following year..I got married at 48..I did end up looking after him, plus my terminally ill father, plus working ft nights. I've always looked after myself,my body.i was nursing and in my 60s was fitter and healthier than my colleagues half my age,who smoked and drank to excess. I saw men in their 30s having strokes because of drug taking, their lives would never be the same. I've never smoked, taken drugs, got drunk.

I sort of get what you mean but I don't feel invisible or not seen

It is because you are middle aged. Which is hard to accept. No longer thirty something which seems more as if part of younger society. No getting around it.
At work, keeping yourself looking good, aging parents , everything seems to need more effort to be noticed, valued and appreciated. Perhaps not so much at forty. By the time 46 comes, definitely.

Did you go through menopause fairly young?