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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

How long do I let him drift?

2 replies

PoliteSquid · Yesterday 19:02

My DS is 18, suspected ND and waiting (4 years so far…) for an appointment. He was at college, hated it but performing well. Got offered a great f/t job and left college 4 months early, didn’t complete the course. Job let him go after a month because he “wasn’t a team player”

We are now into month 6. My own job is quite a senior one in the careers sector… my background is supporting people like DS. But I’m mum to him and therefore clueless and a nag.

How long does this go on for? He gets a bit of UC but doesn’t give a shit about finding work. Please don’t tell me to kick him out because I never will. What can I do to help him or motivate him?! I’m at a loss.

Sorry - edited to add he apparently wants an engineering job or apprenticeship.

OP posts:
PrizedPickledPopcorn · Yesterday 19:13

My similar situation, though a bit further along- resat year 2 of uni, but didn’t succeed so came home- I encouraged him to apply for jobs. He was a Know-how chap in a tech store, then an apprentice IT chap at a firm. When his manager left he took over. And he’s been doing well there ever since. He learns, he performs, he takes responsibility etc.

But he needs to get into work and learn the hard way what does and doesn’t fly.

TeenToTwenties · Yesterday 19:17

Can he go back to college in Sept and repeat the second year?
Or do something different?

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