is this bag childish for year 7

Not cowardly!

Definitely.

Plain black is the safest bet.

Agree that the bag also needs to be much bigger. Kids can carry A LOT of school books around.

You say he’s very fixed on those 2 bags and won’t change his mind. Can you say “oh I just checked the sizes and they’re going to be too small for your books, choose one of these that are big enough” (this time just show a selection that are suitable colours and sizes

@dinosaursroars I know it's easy getting stuck in the minutiae of it all with autism but you started this thread, and you know that bag will make him a target.

Just because he's stubborn or won't like it, isn't a reason to step back as a parent. Yes he's autistic but that doesn't mean he can always have his own way (especially when you know it isn't good for him)

The decathlon bag a PP linked is perfect, and much cheaper than Vinted would be.

I'm not sure what the "touch" you're referring to is? Maybe a typo?

I see this comment a lot, I would imagine forums like mumsnet have a high % of ND users, and therefore the % of ND children will be higher.

My parents are lovely but had no idea about trends or what would help me fit in or even consider fitting in as being important. I hated not having current clothes, bags or shoes. With my child starting high school I asked around to be sure they’d have everything they’d need to wear what others would wear.

Typical would be plain black/grey and needs to be bigger for books

Just out of interest, Is there anyone on MN whose kid hasn't been diagnosed with autism (or ADHD)?

My son is starting year 7 in September.

He still wears 'kid tshirts' around so I've said to him they will need to be 'retired' and only used for home or away from our area.

He understands that there is a 'teenage uniform' as well as a school uniform and you have to follow the rules for both.

Given your son is autistic, I don't think this is a bad way to approach it. You can't break the teenage uniform rules anymore than you can break the school uniform rules.

Yes it sucks, but it helps you keep out of trouble and it serves a purpose. You don't have as much choice at High school as primary.

I am sorry yes they are too young and also too small! I would be inclined to tell him that the school uniform list requires a big plain coloured backpack, don’t worry about adidas ect just get a completely plain one.

My autistic 11 year old is starting in September as well. He's also quite vulnerable, but unbothered by other kids, so does not care if they make comments. Like you, I'm concerned about bullying.
We have also had the debate over school bags. He hates being the same as everyone else, but I'd much rather he try and blend in. We've compromised with the bag and he's agreed to a black Nike bag with a few pin badges so he can personalise it a bit.
Good luck to your son (and you) for September!

I personally wouldn’t have sent my child into year 7 with either of those bags, especially as you say your son is sensitive and you are worried about bullying. My son takes a really strong/ sturdy, big rucksack now as those flimsy ones aren’t big enough and would rip/ break before the end of the school year. Both of my secondary age children just take plain colour bags, it’s the durability I go for more than design.

With those two bags you'd be throwing him to the wolves I fear. No offense to wolves...

The bag needs to be bigger, conveniently this means plain bags. The Hype one might still be too small at H42/W30/D12 though. The colour is the least problematic, you could get away with blocks of colour. You could get patches for the inside/backside of the backpack you could buy alongside.

I agree with others that a bigger, simpler bag would be better. I don’t think it has to be black and plain though if that would make him sad, it could be red, navy, blue, green ect. And you could get key rings, pins, and iron on patches as a compromise! He might enjoy being able to customise a bag.

This

Also @dinosaursroars speak to the school before he goes, they will open a few days piror. Speak to the year 7 leader & senco see if they can try and have him with other SEN kids (as there will be some!) autistic people find it a lot easier to be with others on the spectrum.

Also if you’re worried and it goes very badly, continue with the echp and he can stay home whilst you finish it the process and then go for a sen placement on the grounds of school refusal/mainstream not meeting needs. He will be out for a while, but so many parents do this and it mostly works.

If he’s already shy and a target for bullying then no I wouldn’t send him in with those bags. Both look too small as well and not proper sized bags that he’ll need to carry everything. I would just say you checked the sizes and they’re too small, so here are some other ones that are the right size and only show him plain ones.

How helpful

This. He can have it for home but its too small for school. He needs a big plain black one for school. Job done.
Good luck op.

Im a teacher and I dont see any year 7's with that kind of back pack.

I would take this comment very seriously

You are being a good mum by holding firm on this. Its not a bag for kids his age.

My son would like that second bag and would want it for year 7 easily too! Also very worried, going into year six this year and trying desperately to get an echp.

I would explain it wouldn’t fit all his school stuff especially pe kit on top! So make a compermise he can have a addidas bag but get some pins he likes to stick to the bag or his blazer.

She’s got two other children there and her son isn’t blind.

As a secondary school teacher, I don't see any of our boys with these bags - would echo that he needs a bigger one, and I would suggest a plainer one. Perhaps he could have a Sonic keyring to go on the zip? Or a pencil case? They don't seem to be fussed about what pencil cases the others have.