Im sure this is discussed very frequently on here, but here goes!
Divorced for 5 years, 2 children now aged 11 and 14. Separated about 9 years ago.
They visit every other weekend for 2 nights. He pays cm of £270pm since he left as he has minumum wage job.
However he has received considerable sums over the years through various avenues, and the fmh property buyout, all totalling around £80,000. Had a nice wedding to new wife, now got nice clothes, likes nice things, foreign holidays every year. Not total luxury living, but... knows how to look after himself. I have not been able to work because of childcare, youngest behaviour (ASD) up to now, so been on the old UC. Ive now finally been able to leave UC and im working part time. My new husband (married this year) is now all settled with me and our income is enough to get by. Not a lot, but we are happier on less stress without UC relentless checking (im self employed).
Right! School uniform.
Both need all new clobber, no hand me downs from one kid to the next as the size difference is too big. So far spent £350, and still got to get stationary and shoes for both.
Ex has given extra £80.
Should his £270pm cm be expected to cover this?
Money management is a huge contributing factor of our marriage ending. He said to the boys 'look after your uniform, I helped pay for it.' Which irks slightly. My oldest has developed his own opinions of his fathers money management and contribution over the years as he has seen me struggle, scrimp, save, borrow uniform from lost property, take a coat home i found in the park and washed it as it fitted my son (shamefully) and wear charity shop clothes when they were growing fast, and my youngest used to 'eat' his collars and cuffs regularly with his sensory issues.
There is also a once in a lifetime school trip im letting my oldest son go on with the school which is costing £750, to a place I always promised I would take them but was priced out when I tried. It was my decision to pay for this myself, and did not assume my ex would help me, but it doesnt make it any cheaper.
My question amidst my rant is...would a reasonable dad pay more? AIBU!? Thank you.