my bf wants me and the children to move in with him

Didnt care but does now. Please re read this bit of your post because it sounds very very shallow of him. Your older children are clearly having problems. Concentrate on sorting your family out first before you start looking to disrupt their lives again. The grass is not always greener and disrupting your family so you can do a bit of decorating is crazy and frankly selfish. A chaotic homelife is so bad for children and based on your history with this man that is what you would be giving them.

The one positive thing that stands out in your post is that you have a council tenancy in your own name. You might have made wrong choices in the past, but that is something to cherish, Hang on to that nugget, it is priceless.

A privately rented flat might give you more space but it will be a nightmare of insecurity. By my count you have five children, though I could have counted wrongly. You are excited about the thought of more space and decorating.

Unless you can re configure the rooms then there isn’t much you can do about the space, but there is nothing to stop you thinking about re decoration. Not cheap, but a lot cheaper than being left in a private rental you can’t pay for and end up being evicted, or ending up pregnant again by a man who doesn’t seem to have much concern for your wellbeing, or the wellbeing of your children. Make sure your council is aware of the limitations of your tenancy, Check if you can apply for larger houses.

BUT STAY PUT! DO NOT GIVE UP YOUR TENANCY.

Oh darling.

Do not leave the council house system because it'll be bloody impossible to get back into one when he lets you down next time and you need to leave.

I do not trust this man to stay committed to you and your children. He's shown you his true colours already. That's a red flag, no way should you trust him with making sure you have a roof over your head.

Do not have any more children with this man. Don't. Double up your contraception if you must - IUD and condoms, whatever, just don't. You haven't got the space or the capacity to care for any extra human beings.

The bigger house is a nice idea but he's not the one to make this all happen. Stay with him if you want but stay living separately. Concentrate on your kids.

I wouldn’t either.

No, council flats are like gold dust, don't give it up. Stick yourself on a waiting list for a bigger property.
The dad is neither here or there when it comes to protecting your home and a house over your children's heads (your role as a mum is to protect them), don't put his wants in front of your children's security.. If you guys are into each other, it will work but time will tell over the next few years.

April? As in April 2026? 3 months?
Absolutely fucking not. Give your kids stability and a secure home and stay in your Council flat.
No cock is worth messing your kids up for.

Please don’t give up your flat, that would be a decision with dire consequences if things go bad. Not suggesting they will, but I’ve never known anyone to give up a council tenancy for love / to help family / new job in a different area, and say it was a good move with hindsight.

get on the swap list and keep applying, for the love of god do not make this decision with your heart. Baby is small enough to not need their own room just yet. This man left you when you were incredibly vulnerable, you can’t risk you and your children depending on him for housing.

Do not give up your secure home for the leopard you currently think has changed his spots. Write this out 100 times.

Leopards never ever change their spots. Believe me, I know.

We are all telling you the same thing. DONT!

You can't decorate a private rental. You can decorate your council flat. only thing I could change in my place was the light shades and the white goods, we offered to buy better ones the landlord could keep if we moved. Nothing else.

You need to exchange or wait to be rehoused. Do not move out. You will end up homeless when this goes tits up. Sorry ❤️

No, please do not give up your council flat for him. My sister gave up her lovely council house, to move in with her new boyfriend. After 5 years he has kicked her, and her son and their shared children out! She is currently renting and deeply regrets her decision. You don’t know what might happen in the future, I wouldn’t move unless we married and he/we bought a house for us to live in.

Il say what I said on your last thread stop putting men ahead of your children

Do not give up yours and your children’s security of your council flat for a man who only been back on the scene a few months!! He needs to do a lot lot more to prove he’s worthy of your affections and to uproot your children!!

I'm not sure how it all works, but he's not just after a bigger house is he? And needs to move in with you to get one? You said he lives in a flat too.

Where to begin with this.
Firstly OP, do yourself a favour and go and get some bombproof contraception. If you genuinely cannot make a very simple, obvious life choice like prioritising the children you've already got by keeping your council tenancy, then I don't think you need to be bringing any more into the world.
I'm so tired of reading about parents who put their frivolous short-lived relationships over their children's wellbeing.
Do better.

Sorry to be so blunt, but come on.

Don't give up your council flat. If things go wrong, you will have nothing.

Perhaps look for a swap instead to somewhere bigger. My DB has a bigger HA house than he needs and ive suggested he downsize, so there will be other people like that too.

You have to think what is best for your DCs

No, don’t do this, @tiredbuttryin5

Your children need stability, not chaos. You need to prioritise them over an on-off relationship with a man who probably isn’t good for you.

Girl, please give your head a wobble. You've already gone through homelessness. Do not under any circumstances give up the roof over your kids heads for anyone. Especially not a man who has already let you down once. You've been good for a couple of months. It can all change again. Keep your home.

You can't sublet a council property, and no local authority is going to give you permission to rent out your home while you live elsewhere. It needs to be your only home and your permanent home. Do not add him to the tenancy whatever you do. Focus on stability for your DC OP.

Just stop making bad decisions. Stay in your current flat and don’t have any more children.

Do NOT give up your council flat. This would be insane.

Make it work. You don’t need massive space if you are organised. Impose some discipline on the children.

And for heaven’s sake stop having more children.

Too much too soon OP. Prioritise your children. You have a secure home for them, keep it that way. The relationship sounds tenuous at best. A few months of good behaviour is not a reason to upend your childrens lives and expect them to live with a virtual stranger - especially when there have been issues with previous partners. Create a safe spae for them, let him visit but don't move in with him and do not move him into the house either.

Listen to the advice, OP. I know having something exciting like the decorating etc is really enticing but security and your independence is worth far more.

Don't get sucked into the rose tinted glasses version of what you want, the reality has proven time and time again to you that it's never how it works out.
Be confident in yourself and don't give your all to him, you know him and what he's capable of. Keep your control and your home, don't give it away so easy and so soon.

How big is your current flat, and how many children do you have, at what ages?

I remember you, I can’t believe you’ve gotten back with him. Do not leave your council flat, start prioritising your existing children and for god’s sake, do not get pregnant again. You need to start making better decisions for the sake of your kids.

Don’t give up council flat - get permission to sublet and say you’re also living there with lodger. Then move to his, keeping your flat.