Page 10 | How do people not know they smell?

Dryrobe45 · 06/08/2026 18:49

Ipollita · 04/08/2026 22:54

I think you’d be surprised at the number of people who were never taught how to properly take care of themselves.

There’s a young lad who works in a local shop who absolutely stinks of putrid BO and that sour damp smell of clothes that have been left in the machine too long. It’s quite literally eye watering. Obviously I don’t know the reason but you’d think his boss would have a quiet word.

There’s a guy who works in our local supermarket who is the same. I’m astounded that his colleagues haven’t complained to HR about it. I’m assuming they haven’t because a) he still absolutely reeks, and b) if he had been spoken to by HR and hasn’t improved, he probably would have been managed out by now. He’s been there a few years. If I turn the corner of an isle and see him, I divert to a different route!

JustToBeMe · 06/08/2026 18:59

So…
my mum (82) lost her sense of smell, as did her mum many years before her.
She can’t smell..
My sibling and I have to remind her to apply antiperspirant, she doesn’t because she has read somewhere it causes cancer.
She has got a smart phone, which doesn’t get used.
She doesn’t understand it.
No broad band, tablet etc as she doesn’t understand it. Doesn’t want to to be fair.
so apart from going on and on about it, wh@t do you do? 🤷‍♀️

MrsOctaviaCharlotteSmythe · 06/08/2026 19:10

sioermt · 04/08/2026 22:00

I’m not talking “it’s hot, I’ve been sweating and headed home for a shower” or I’m disabled and can’t shower so have a sink wash or even showering every day

went to the supermarket today and was hit with a wall of body odour from someone in front of me to the point in caught in my throat. Every aisle they went down stunk of it, people were moving away and looking who the smell was from. It was acrid beyond belief. it was a couple who were driving and seemed perfectly normal apart from this smell as if they hadn’t showered in months

im not sure how to explain it but sometimes its like your nose does not smell it, so you think you dont smell etc

MrsOctaviaCharlotteSmythe · 06/08/2026 19:12

there was a very odd case when i was at university, where a person was wearing their underwear for long periods without washing them as an experiment in fabics for a university project they were doing that was the most unusual one, the only reason the group of firends knew was because yes they did apologise but then they explained why they were doing it

bryceQ · 06/08/2026 19:57

I worked with someone like this, she was in a senior role. I think her clothes were damp and the sweat smell wasn’t being cleaned off properly, so every time she sweat it was reactivating the smell on the clothes. It was really strong. I am very smell conscious and found it very difficult to be in the same room.

looselegs · 07/08/2026 09:09

OhThePotential · 06/08/2026 14:46

Nobody did that for me. The only toiletries in our house were my dad’s shaving stuff, a bottle of Vosene and a bar of cracked, filthy soap on the side of the kitchen sink.

No shower. Just an emersion heater that was put on once a week for a shallow bath that was used by my parents after me.

For those who don’t believe me I just say count your blessings.

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That's really sad, I'm sorry your upbringing was like that x

GlomOfNit · 07/08/2026 12:40

OhThePotential · 05/08/2026 16:00

I grew up in the 1970’s working class and in some ways deprived (though loved and not as badly off as some) and I think lots of people just never learn to take care of themselves. It isn’t innate, although I can see how those who had stable, middle class childhoods can think it is.

There is obviously a lot I could write but as an example, when I entered puberty I was bullied at school because I smelled and when I told my mother she just said ‘well put some mum on then’ and I didn’t know what she meant and she wouldn’t talk about it further. I had to go and trawl round Boots with my Saturday job money to try and sort myself out.

Our bathroom was never fit for purpose and we washed at the kitchen sink on the rare occasions that happened. My parents were born in the 1920’s, had had shocking early lives and even this was a step up for them.

I learned only after leaving home to go to university that daily washing, deodorant and twice daily teeth brushing are normal. I was never taken to the dentist as a child and as a result had to have extensive restorative treatment in my twenties and to this day have a severe phobia about teeth. Even writing that has sent my heart racing.

I can well see how, if someone grew up in similar circumstances they would continue to spiral downwards if they were unable to improve their financial and social lot in life and are now living without running water/in a hoarding situation, both of which I know are common in my current local area.

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You're a rare voice of compassion and empathy on this thread, and I can see that it comes from a very personal understanding of why some people, alive and walking around right now in 2026, might have had such disadvantaged upbringings that they might genuinely struggle with 'doing the necessary'.

Some people on here have no idea how lucky they are.

GlomOfNit · 07/08/2026 12:46

My dad, who's now 83 and getting dementia (and also lives abroad and resists any sort of live-in or visiting care - believe me when I say I'm working hard on this!) smells. Sometimes because he's had a bit of a toilet emergency or has farted and followed through (he also has gut issues), but all the time because he no longer showers unless marched there and helped. Partly he's scared about falling, mostly it just no longer occurs to him. When I or my mum are there, that's what we do. (Yes I've showered my naked dad. It's very ... humbling, I think is one of the words I'd use. None of us are above having to do this sort of care for a loved one.) He uses soap rather than gel but if it's left to him, he just splashes water on. It's a smell of Old Man, body oils, stale sweat and sometimes some incontinence. I find that if I help him up from the sofa it lingers on my arms.

It makes me sadder than I can say but until he accepts a better care regime and we can work out how that actually works in the country he lives in, this is him.

He no longer goes out (and when he did, he would shower first) but if he did, I'd hate to think that people like some of the posters on here would just recoil in disgust and call him a 'minger'. You need to exercise some compassion and empathy. He never used to be like this and you may one day be reduced, by your neurological function, to a similar state.

Palomiino · 07/08/2026 13:53

@GlomOfNitI think most people would realise what the problem is for an 83 year old in poor health. Those are not the cases that most of us are referring to!

Notaboutthebass · 07/08/2026 14:22

I suppose if you've got something medical going on, you can shower and still smell straight after?

EmeraldShamrock000 · 07/08/2026 14:44

Try using public transport. A man sat in the seat beside me once, for 5 stops, he looked rough too with facial scars so I didn’t want to risk opening the window, he smelled of urine and sweat sitting with his legs spread. I held my breath so long I thought I was going to pass out. Another lady on a different occasion sat opposite me, face to face, legs spread in a long skirt, the smell of her lady bits was worse than a bucket of rotten fish.
There should be a limit to how bad can you stink before being refused a seat on public transport.
If it’s under 5 miles, I’ll walk.

Whosthetabbynow · 07/08/2026 14:51

LostThestral · 05/08/2026 10:09

I get exactly what you are saying OP.

On holiday recently I commented to DH that the street we were walking down smelt of stale wee only realise when we caught up that it was actually a lady walking in front of us

Jeez.

igelkott2026 · 07/08/2026 14:54

On these threads people always say it's a medical condition, mental health problem etc.

Some people just won't use deodorant.

A lingering smell of stale clothes could be because of mould in the washing machine.

nomas · 07/08/2026 14:57

EmeraldShamrock000 · 07/08/2026 14:44

Try using public transport. A man sat in the seat beside me once, for 5 stops, he looked rough too with facial scars so I didn’t want to risk opening the window, he smelled of urine and sweat sitting with his legs spread. I held my breath so long I thought I was going to pass out. Another lady on a different occasion sat opposite me, face to face, legs spread in a long skirt, the smell of her lady bits was worse than a bucket of rotten fish.
There should be a limit to how bad can you stink before being refused a seat on public transport.
If it’s under 5 miles, I’ll walk.

Did you consider moving seats at the next stop?

Edited to add: I’ve realised myself that one does sort of freeze in these situations. I had a crazy guy right in my face on the tube once, but I still
kept my seat.

Whosthetabbynow · 07/08/2026 15:01

ifyoucloseyoureye · 05/08/2026 08:12

What are you wearing that it takes you two minutes to get it off?!

I’m declaring this thread full of stinky buggers who want to make excuses instead of getting in a shower.

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Take nightie off 5 seconds. Get under the shower. Wet hair. Shampoo. Rinse. Put conditioner on. Whilst it’s on use body wash. Rinse off conditioner and body wash. Turn shower off. Towel dry hair. Add hair products. Dry body. Deodorant. Clean teeth with electric toothbrush. I do that every morning. Must take about 10 minutes. Then I do my make up. Another 10 minutes. Every morning without fail.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 07/08/2026 15:02

No, not from the man, he had a psychotic aura, foot tapping, agitated, bottle stab marks around his face and neck, there was plenty of seats and he sat in with me.
I was going to get off and walk the rest of the way if he hadn’t of got off. I had a feeling he was going to the drug clinic for his top up and he did.
I opened every window once he left.

Original poster

sioermt · 07/08/2026 15:30

GlomOfNit · 07/08/2026 12:46

My dad, who's now 83 and getting dementia (and also lives abroad and resists any sort of live-in or visiting care - believe me when I say I'm working hard on this!) smells. Sometimes because he's had a bit of a toilet emergency or has farted and followed through (he also has gut issues), but all the time because he no longer showers unless marched there and helped. Partly he's scared about falling, mostly it just no longer occurs to him. When I or my mum are there, that's what we do. (Yes I've showered my naked dad. It's very ... humbling, I think is one of the words I'd use. None of us are above having to do this sort of care for a loved one.) He uses soap rather than gel but if it's left to him, he just splashes water on. It's a smell of Old Man, body oils, stale sweat and sometimes some incontinence. I find that if I help him up from the sofa it lingers on my arms.

It makes me sadder than I can say but until he accepts a better care regime and we can work out how that actually works in the country he lives in, this is him.

He no longer goes out (and when he did, he would shower first) but if he did, I'd hate to think that people like some of the posters on here would just recoil in disgust and call him a 'minger'. You need to exercise some compassion and empathy. He never used to be like this and you may one day be reduced, by your neurological function, to a similar state.

I’ve been a carer, if I can see someone is elderly, has had a stroke, obvious disabilities then no I wouldn’t judge
this was 2 x 40 something in a couple that were driving, shopping and mobile. Yes I know not all disabilities are visible but there is a limit as to what other people can be forced to tolerate

OP posts:

murasaki · 07/08/2026 15:33

It is possible to feel some sympathy for someone in this situation (not all, obviously) but still feel revolted and not want to spend time in close proximity to them.