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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Menopause

4 replies

InBedBy10 · 04/08/2026 13:41

Ever since I turned 40 (im 43 now) I"m being constantly told im in peri menopause. Not by doctors or professionals but by random woman. Some I know well, some not so well. If I say im hot, oh thats menopause 🙄 No Jan I didnt say im having a hot flash, i said I was hot. Its 30 bloody degrees. Everyone is hot.

If I say I had a bad night's sleep. Thats menopause. If i had a bad nights sleep 5yrs ago it was just a bad nights sleep. Now its a diagnosis. If im in a bad mood, Menopause. I cant remember a certain word. Thats brain fog. Menopause. And its always a woman.

Ive just read a thread where the OP isn't happy with their partner and wondering should they leave?. The first few responses went straight to menopause and advice to get on HRT. The OP had to clarify they're a man.

Im glad there's more awareness around menopause and peri menopause. It was much needed. But now everyone thinks they're an expert and diagnosing woman.

Ive been to my GP and was told im not in peri menopause yet. Not that it would bother me if I was. Im just sick of being told I am by people who dont know what theyre talking about. Has anyone else experienced this?

OP posts:
IHateAlzheimers · 04/08/2026 21:46

Well to be fair no one told us and we really missed out so there may be a small course correction required now everyone is shouting about it. I wish I'd known about all the symptoms in my early 40's because it was definitely peri and I just thought I was going insane and literally ended up screaming into the wind. But yes, we could pipe down. Just a tiny bit > <. Sorry.

ScrambledEggs12 · 04/08/2026 22:15

Yes, I feel the same. I'm 45.

Crap night's sleep - friends saying it must be peri-menopause. No, it's because my partner snores.

EsmeSusanOgg · 04/08/2026 22:18
  1. Yes. I have never slept well - always had crappy periods / raging PMS etc. Now if I mention any of these things, people tell me it is peri. How ccna it have been peri if it has been the same way since I was 14!?
HamBap · 04/08/2026 22:36

I know what you mean, it seems half of Mumsnet is trying for a baby at 42 and being told how normal and fertile we all still are, and the other half are 34 and talking about perimenopause...

(Though in my case it absolutely is menopause!)

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