Furious at ds work dismissal

Yes, this. It would have been respectful to reach an agreement in advance if he was unwilling to take an earlier train.

If in probation, can terminate for many reasons including this

The post wasn’t at all nasty. Come on. Have a thicker skin. The post was just pointing out the logical reasoning.
I would have had the same logical thought as the poster. Just get the earlier train every day to make sure you aren’t late. Jeez - it’s not rocket science

I understand that you’re upset OP, we want the best for our kids of course, but you can’t be late every single day and not expect something like this to happen. They may have been OK with him being late on the odd occasion but it sounds like he’s taken it literally and just carried on being late. Really that should have happened only once and he should have started to get an earlier train. Trains are unpredictable at the best of times and I speak as somebody who commuted from the Home Counties into London for 27 years. I was late on a very odd occasion and that was always due to transport failure. I don’t think there is any way he can come back from this other than maybe appeal to them and promise to get the earlier train. Otherwise he needs to find a job that is closer to home and make sure he’s on time. Maybe he’ll find something better suited? I wish him luck.

Your son may well be spinning you a yarn, OP. Of course the employers didn't tell him that it was OK to turn up late! And I'm surprised you didn't encourage him to get an earlier train, anyway. In fact, most of us would aim to be at work 10 to 15 minutes early, surely?
Treat this as a learning experience for your son, and hopefully his timekeeping will be better in future.

Good point. Being late every day is not normally ok, a different start time should have been agreed, so it's unlikely they really said it was okay . Perhaps management should have been clearer but DS shouldn't have expected his behaviour to be well received. Hopefully he will learn from it and find another job soon.

I agree. It sounds like there's been a bit of a communication misunderstanding. He thought he was telling them the train would make him late every day, they thought he meant occasionally.

It's tough on your DS but unfortunately he doesn't really have any comeback. I would view it as a lesson learned.

Reading between the lines here, I would suspect that they've either decided they don't need the post any more or have someone else they want to offer it to. It costs money to advertise/interview/train someone so he may have been on shaky ground anyway. Most good employers will give someone a chance to improve after a warning so I think he's probably dodged a bullet.

Onwards and upwards.

It’s a great life lesson for him, be on time because people don’t stay employed with regular tardiness issues.

I think YANBU because the employer shouldn't have told him it was fine if it wasn't.

I don't know what sort of job he had. Some can't offer much flexibility re. working hours but many can, and some employers are much more flexible about hours than they used to be. I work flexitime and don't even have core hours anymore. Even before my employers brought in flexitime, one of my colleagues left eight minutes early every day so she could catch the 16:55 bus home, and no one minded!

What time did he leave the house @OneGreyBiscuit ?

He was late for work every single day and only managed to get to work on time after the employer emailed him and told him to get the earlier train. And you think the employer is the dickhead ??!!

And I’ve worked in the Public sector. Even with flexible working, start and finish times are according to operational needs, not individual preference - in most places I’ve worked, core hours are from 9-9.30am - arrive after that time and you’re late unless it’s pre-arranged. DS doesn’t need flexible working, he needs to learn to get his arse out of bed to get to work on time and develop some discipline, otherwise he’s going to find working life very difficult.

He was late everyday! In what world is this acceptable? It doesn't matter where he lives; if he's taken on a job, he needs to be on time. If the job is too far, and he can't handle jumping on an earlier train, he needs to find a job closer to home.

This sense of entitlement that you are teaching your son to have is not doing him any favours. Frankly, I'm shocked that you're furious at the employer. You should be furious at your son for his poor time-keeping.

What's wrong with people these days? Basic stuff.

I think people have been a not harsh. I commute and there is a train that would get me in bang on time. Knowing the trains as I do, it would basically involve being a few mins late every day and my experience tells me that another colleague will moan and it'll look bad on me, so i just get an earlier train and arrive early. I accepted the job and the start time, it is what it is.

Your ds is is young and a bit naive. I expect they agreed thinking that was the only option but likely someone else lives in a similar situation is getting in early and has had a moan. Perhaps there were other factors at play and they are just using time keeping as an excuse. In short they can do it, my advice to DS when you are new and unproven in a role you have to do the hard yards and get the earlier train. Msybe once he had passed probation and was adding value THEN he could have asked for the flexibility, but its rarely a good idea to start out this way. He is young just chalk it up as a lesson learnt for next time. All those being unnecessarily harsh and name calling I guess you arrived perfect in your first job and didn't learn any though lessons along the way?! 🙄

OP, I can feel your outrage and protective motherly instinct kicking in. Initially I assumed that there was only one train running hence them being okay with his lateness, but it doesn't make sense that your son didn't just get the earlier train to begin with. His (now ex) employer had to tell him to do it. Surely you can see the issue with that?

This lesson will shape him, not break him. Think of it as a gift. He will be a better employee in the future.

How infrequent are the trains ?
And who was the person telling him being late was okay ?
A colleague or his line manager ?

☝️Case in point.

They don't know who they are unless they're licking someone's boots somewhere.

Idiots.

I think there are some questions which need answering.
Who told him it was okay to be a little late? Did they definitely mean that it was okay to be consistently late or did they perhaps mean "don't worry about it today", or perhaps an intermediate "we're not going to worry if it happens from time to time".
If they definitely indicated that they were happy for him to start a little later on a regular basis, did he get this in writing? Was there any payback such as having a slightly shorter lunch break or finishing slightly later.

(Lesson for future: always get permissions like this put in writing.)

There may have been some miscommunication
Did they actually tell him it's OK or did someone rised an eyebrow and went "hmmmmm, ok" sarcastically.
It may also have been thyey were taken aback by him anouncing he would be late they sort of were speechless. I had a trainee who was coming late frequently a few years ago and found it pretty hard to convey it's not OK- it's on me, but Im not confrontational and was too nice about it, until a review came and it was in b&w left there. It gave me an experience of managing stuff like that, but maybe the person in your son;s work didnt have it. Also new starters cant often do the same thing as people who have been there for years, so that's also not an excuse.
At any rate, one month in, being late and already taking a holiday, obviously he did because it wa spreplaned etc, but it does not look the best, annoying as it is. Hope he finds something else soon.

Common sense seems lacking, earlier train would’ve been the answer.

However, I don’t think your Son is giving you the full story.

No-one here is dim, how rude. And no-one has ‘failed to read’ that the employer was OK with it. The issue is what they were actually OK with. The fact that he’s been late every single day and has now been sacked is a very clear indication that they weren’t OK with it at all, and that there has either been some sort of miscommunication or DS hasn’t been truthful.

My own interpretation is that they thought his lateness was a one off due to train delays and it’s become clearer over time that the train he chose to take was never going to get him to work on time. He proved today that he can get to work on time but in order to do so, he had to be told to get an earlier train. That shows lack of initiative and l’d bet the farm that that’s also a problem in other areas of his work and that’s why he was sacked. Things aren’t always as they seem.

Welcome to the world of work, sweetie.

I'm sorry about your son's employer. Most of them are dickheads and most adults know that really.

Tell him to avoid working for private companies if he can and to swerve family owned places completely. They tend to be extremely hard of thinking when it comes to these matters.

Flexi with core hours would probably suit him better. Civil service and local authorities work like that. He could get there any time between around 7 and 11 as long as he stays to complete his 7.5 hours.

Ignore the nasty comments OP. Folks on mumsnet get really really weird about jobs and work in general.

The employer has literally sacked him for being late every day, so clearly he wasn’t bright enough to realise they were not ok with him being late every day

I'm sorry that the laughing emoji upset you. The thing is, whilst no it's not funny he lost his job, I just can't believe someone would go to work in their first week so unenthused about their job that they thought it wouldn't matter to be late every day. Then when pulled up on it, his response wass "OK I'll just get the earlier train then". That just shows he didn't really have a strong basis for getting the train he did - he should have doubled down on how difficult it was to get the earlier train rather than accepting it.

The other thing that shows his lack of enthusiasm is the lack of checking it's OK - I'm guessing what's happened is (as an example) he's asked Bob the deputy if it's OK if he's late, Bob has said yeah whatever - the other employees (expecting the newbie to be full of enthusiasm and vigour) have likely thought it's not on and reported the situation, or Brian the head of department came in and thought it was silly and he's got the sack. He should have sought confirmation from the right person in writing to cover his back.

In all honesty, if it was a job he really, really wanted he should have shown the right attitude. If it was a job he didn't want, he's certainly showing it and I don't know why you're angry at the employer. I hate to say it but you sound entitled and it's probably rubbed off on your son. Lesson learned, turn up with enthusiasm and in a timely fashion at the next job - whether it's McDonald's or a bank!

Why did they sack him then?