Is this Mumsnet for me? Shocked at responses

Agree with OP, not always very pleasant, some very aggressive types, drinking?, or bitter and judgmental . What's so special about swearing in a forum, to a lot of people you don't know who try to air an issue. Toxic.

AIBU is definitely quite harsh. Recently showed DH a thread and he was suprised it was so hostile and I had to explain to him that no that’s just AIBU, most of the other boards are fine.

Probably the most kind and supportive positive experience I’ve had was on the baby name thread on my old account. Worlds apart from AIBU. I was a bit anxious to post because of previous experience and was expecting people to rinse our name choices but it was actually great and we got our second daughter’s name from there.

Ah, I am mum to a DD who trans ID’d from 12 until recently. Not sure where she sits on this now other than understanding that she is never going to be able to change sex and needs to come to terms with the idea that although she wishes she was a male, she’s not. I’ve been on the other side of the fence with people telling me I’m a cruel terf bigot who will drive her child to suicide if I don’t affirm, when actually I just thing this cohort of young women especially need love, support and acceptance while they work this stuff out, which takes time. And their families need the same while they navigate it all. MN can be a tough place wherever you sit on that issue, sadly.

And so you prove OP's point?

Don’t conflate mumsnet as a whole with AIBU.
AIBU attracts a Certain Type. And most of the traffic, which is why I like AIBU. But there are other, more gentle sections. Chat is usually more civilised although some of the AIBU arseholes do pop up a bit more these days.
At the end of the day it’s just a chat forum, if you don’t like it, there’s always Reddit 😁

I won't swear at you or be obnoxious, OP! Not everyone is like that.

I know the difference between an argument and a shouting match and I don't descend to personal insults just because I don't agree with someone.

But I won't lie to you...there are some rude, potty-mouthed and aggressive people on here - don't let them upset you and remember, it's their problem, not yours, if they are nasty. It can't really be personal on an internet forum.

I can assure you people are told to chuck their DC out. I can't link tonight as I'd have to search an old user name but I will tomorrow.

I agree about the pile on and constantly repeating what others have said. Its like they get a kick out of it.

I’m not sure I’ve ever met a person who held an opinion they didn’t actually agree with.

I’ve learnt a lot on here, mostly that there a quite a few people live lives of quiet sorrow, lives hollowed out and narrowed by decisions they made when they believed they were safe and loved.

OP why are you dragging up old posts?

Of course. Covid was practically the only thing we were allowed to talk about, and this could be said of real life as well: nothing else in the world mattered at all. Certainly talking about the harms of months and months of lockdown on our children was absolutely forbidden, as was daring to suggest that the government might be taking us all for fools: and those of us who thought this were proven right, when Partygate came to light.

Are you ok op? Why do you keep repeating yourself like some kind of odd “be kind” robot?

And if you are from the 'be kind' brigade then it really would be a good idea to leave. Good bye. 🙋‍♂️

Then post on another part of MN (not AIBU) or another website altogether. Your opinion is valid but it won't change anything and as you're dissatisfied here, best for you to move on

OP you can ever say cunt on here - if you really want to.

It's worth bearing in mind that AIBU isn't known as a 'bear pit' for nothing.

It's wonderful to have a place where people are free to express themselves. As long as you are not directly offensive to someone then you can say whatever you want. If you don't like swearing and freedom of speech then I suggest you leave.

I must read the wrong threads as I very rarely see nasty posts and if I do then I just ignore them.

Why do you take notice of nasty people? They are just being nasty for attention. Don't give it to them.

This just isn't true. There are some very well respected MN transmen on the feminist boards. The 'Terf' feminists board are also extremely supportive of women with trans children and will point them towards all sorts of useful websites and groups. What they don't endorse is telling children that they can become boy/girls when they are girls/boys or allowing them to toilet, change or share accommodation with the wrong sex. Terfs are generally extremely supportive of dressing however the hell you like as long as it's not parading around in fetish wear.

I have never, ever seen a parent told that they should throw their trans child out so can you please put some links up if this is actually true because until then I don't believe it for a second.

guess i'm about to be deleted

ohhh do fuck off

If you're analysing a decision whether to stay or leave a forum, I think you've got your answer. It isn't that deep and it's a release for a lot of people. This place means nothing to our own personal lives.