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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to consider getting married on my birthday?

44 replies

Bishbashbush · 01/08/2026 21:02

Just looking for opinions on whether or not it would be strange to get married on my birthday.

Bit of background. DP and I recently got engaged, after eight lovely years together. Delay was caused by my divorce. We’ve both been married before (to other people) and had the “typical” wedding for our respective cultures. Our families are split between three countries.

We want to elope and get married middle of next year. Just us and my two DC (16 &12) The date that works best is my birthday. I’m happy with it and so is DP but something is throwing me off. It would be so lovely to wake up on my birthday and get married. I know if we ever split then my birthday will forever be tainted. Obviously neither of us are thinking of this outcome but life is life.

Did you get married on your birthday? Would you?

OP posts:
DoAWheelie · 01/08/2026 22:00

Don't do it - my late OH's birthday was the day after our anniversary. We always intended to celebrate both each year, but with limited time, money, and energy one always ended up a bit lackluster. You'll regret it in a few years when you never get a day that is fully yours while your husband still gets the full works.

Original poster
Bishbashbush · 01/08/2026 21:56

mindutopia · 01/08/2026 21:07

Personally, I wouldn’t. Both are lovely things to celebrate, but I wouldn’t want them to be on the same day. Your birthday is about you. Then it forever becomes a day when you’re celebrating your partner, thinking about anniversary gifts, making a restaurant booking for both of you. We get so few days for ourselves and especially as women do a lot of the emotional labour of special celebrations. I’d want to have those be too different days rather than mashed up together.

Very good points! I had loosely considered this as I do genuinely enjoy my birthday and love feeling a bit special for the day. I feel the wedding anniversary would take precedence. Might be best to have two separate occasions.

OP posts:
Glitchymn1 · 01/08/2026 21:55

Everyone will combine that celebration and your anniversary will be your birthday which should be your day. You’re losing out!

Original poster
Bishbashbush · 01/08/2026 21:53

ndeplume · 01/08/2026 21:17

I got married on my birthday - no problems but now I am widowed it makes my birthday a bit sad.................... wish I'd picked a different date.

(I've name changed for this post).

Oh I’m sorry this happened 😞 I naively hadn’t even considered this outcome.

OP posts:
DelilahBucket · 01/08/2026 21:22

We were going to get married on my birthday, just because it happened to be the only date we could at the time of year we wanted. COVID got involved though and we had to postpone twice and ended up getting married at a completely different time of year, just so we could get married.

Waheymum · 01/08/2026 21:21

Almost, DH and I initially planned and booked a tiny wedding on our shared birthday but then cancelled and booked a slightly bigger one on our anniversary instead.

ndeplume · 01/08/2026 21:17

I got married on my birthday - no problems but now I am widowed it makes my birthday a bit sad.................... wish I'd picked a different date.

(I've name changed for this post).

SeriousTissues · 01/08/2026 21:13

Just do it!

ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/08/2026 21:11

Would it bother you if you split up? It might not seem as nice if you divorce

SnowflakeSmasher86 · 01/08/2026 21:09

mindutopia · 01/08/2026 21:07

Personally, I wouldn’t. Both are lovely things to celebrate, but I wouldn’t want them to be on the same day. Your birthday is about you. Then it forever becomes a day when you’re celebrating your partner, thinking about anniversary gifts, making a restaurant booking for both of you. We get so few days for ourselves and especially as women do a lot of the emotional labour of special celebrations. I’d want to have those be too different days rather than mashed up together.

Hadn’t thought of this but that’s a good point, as well as the potential to always feel a bit sad on your bday if you split up! Which is a slightly pessimistic but still very real possibility.

AyeAyeCaptian · 01/08/2026 21:08

This was an option for me but decided not to. Divorced now. So glad I didn't.

Overtheatlantic · 01/08/2026 21:07

What’s going to happen in the future when he manages to forget your birthday And your anniversary? 😆

2chocolateoranges · 01/08/2026 21:07

I wouldn’t get married on my birthday I’d want another date.

my friend got married on her birthday and divorced a few years later her birthday is a bit tainted for her due to what happened.

mindutopia · 01/08/2026 21:07

Personally, I wouldn’t. Both are lovely things to celebrate, but I wouldn’t want them to be on the same day. Your birthday is about you. Then it forever becomes a day when you’re celebrating your partner, thinking about anniversary gifts, making a restaurant booking for both of you. We get so few days for ourselves and especially as women do a lot of the emotional labour of special celebrations. I’d want to have those be too different days rather than mashed up together.

ShetlandishMum · 01/08/2026 21:06

Yes. I would. And did.

hahabahbag · 01/08/2026 21:05

up you, five if you want to.

fartoomuchtoblerone · 01/08/2026 21:05

I wasn’t sure which way to vote but I don’t see much reason to avoid your birthday. You’ll have a wonderful day!

Bananacrepewithnuts · 01/08/2026 21:05

OMG how old are you ?
Just do it. X

BIWI · 01/08/2026 21:02

Just do it!

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