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AIBU?

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Original poster

I know I’m stupid so why am I hurting so much and just need to say no and end the cycle

37 replies

TheOpalFox · 01/08/2026 11:23

My partner keeps finishing with me then pulling me back in

Why can’t I just have the strength to say enough is enough??

Killing me so much 😞

OP posts:
Onmytod24 · 01/08/2026 11:55

You keep going back because you like being treated badly.

HoppityBun · 01/08/2026 11:45

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 01/08/2026 11:36

Because you let him!

That’s not answering her question.

@TheOpalFox there are many reasons why this happens. It’s likely that there’s a pattern in his treatment of you, or a way of being in a relationship, that you’ve absorbed growing up. You want intimacy and for some reason you can’t believe that you can be happy away from him. You will benefit if you can look at this with a therapist to help you understand and change.

You will never be happy with this man but you can be happy and well in the future and once you decide to end this, you will feel such relief and as though a weight has been lifted from you. Please do try to find someone who is trained to help you

PollyBell · 01/08/2026 11:43

Maybe you enjoy being a doormat and have no self respect, naybe someone saying this may make you think

chirrupybird · 01/08/2026 11:42

He doesn't seem to love you, he's just keeping you on a string until something better comes along. He's being cruel keeping blowing hot and cold, it won't get better now he knows he can get away with it.

lindanovak · 01/08/2026 11:41

TheOpalFox · 01/08/2026 11:36

Because I love him so much but equally I’m being stupid .(

Show quote history

Stop and try to apply logic. He is treating you like you are worthless, why do you love a man like that? I suspect you love the idea of him and the relationship you want rather than the one you have.

MzHz · 01/08/2026 11:40

TheOpalFox · 01/08/2026 11:36

Because I love him so much but equally I’m being stupid .(

Show quote history

But this isn’t love sweetheart, you know it’s not.

love doesn’t hurt.

what is the current status? On or off?

if off, block him on everything now, change your number/email if necessary but get him OUT of your life.

start the detox from this poison.

it will never, ever, ever get any better and you do - in your heart of hearts- know this.

choose you, choose hope and happiness. He’s not a part of your future.

be strong.

HighlightsInHerHair · 01/08/2026 11:39

I don’t understand why people do this (I mean your partner rather than you going back). My DD had a boyfriend like this and it took until the 4th time around before she wouldn’t take him back. He took ages to get over her as far as she heard and then he was the same with his next girlfriend. It’s strange behaviour but just walk away from the drama. You will never feel confident that he isn’t going to pull the rug again.

Roundandroundthemulberry · 01/08/2026 11:38

Match his treatment of you to give you the strength to end this.

Original poster
TheOpalFox · 01/08/2026 11:36

Rumpledandcrumpled · 01/08/2026 11:36

i don’t know why you keep going back. Low self esteem, desperation, we can’t guess, but only you can stop it.

Because I love him so much but equally I’m being stupid .(

OP posts:
Rumpledandcrumpled · 01/08/2026 11:36

i don’t know why you keep going back. Low self esteem, desperation, we can’t guess, but only you can stop it.

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 01/08/2026 11:36

Because you let him!

Hito · 01/08/2026 11:34

Because he can!!