Hand hold needed - away with cheating DH

You don’t need a lawyer for a divorce. You can just do it online and figure out the specifics with chat gpt.

I’d get hold of her number and text her from your phone to say he has syphilis so best steer clear

Oh my god OP, poor you. He is awful.

I would consider coming home early, promise the kids some fun treats to get them on board.

Take a deep breath and just get through today.
How many days do you have?
Are the kids OK?

Milk tankers???? Fok off!

It'd be the absolute end of the marriage for me, just on 'milk tankards' alone 🤮

You may not need a lawyer for that much if you can come to an agreement mutually - personally I would set out in your head what you want working from 50/50 and childcare arrangement and go from there, doesnt matter if you could potentially get a lot more if it’s what you are comfortable with and if he agrees, saves costs and the genuine stress of nastiness that comes in if going to and fro with lawyers for quite a long while -Obviously if he doesn’t agree, bring in the Rottweilers! I know someone who had a perfectly good deal offered, decided to try and get more, ended up with 45,000 more but similar in costs and a lot of stress

That piece of shit is your children’s role
model op. This is what they see as their future and how relationships are. How men behave and how life is. They have no reason to question it, and accept it as fact as children.

If you are not prepared to go home, then he needs to move out of the apartment. It’s not actually safe to have such an intoxicated adult male near them.

The kids won’t care if it’s 1 parent or 2.

All lawyers are expensive, but worth it to negotiate a good settlement.

Do you think it’s good fun for them seeing their father get absolutely plastered around the clock, woken up at 1am, feeling worthless because he ignores them? No.

I am speaking from experience, a child in this scenario lives constantly on egg shells.

How can this be a healthy environment for any child? I am sorry op, but you are in the throes of a serious family crisis. It can’t be business as usual. He is mocking your complacency and worse. You are vulnerable - not at home - no support. I honestly can’t imagine how you are going to continue like this.

Tell him it’s over and ask him to leave. Sorry you are going through this.

Go home.

This is not a holiday
It is going to go from bad to worse, your marriage is failing and he is becoming increasingly problematic. This isn’t fair to your dc. It’s not even safe.

Just go home, leave him there, get your ducks in a row. You need to divorce him asap. There is no coming back from this op.

Wow. Hardly trying to make amends. He has clearly checked out.

You are quite right to be furious.

Is there a kids club the kids could go to so you can leave them somewhere they will be safe? He will clearly be in no state for child care.

💐sorry you are going through this

Why should she ruin the children’s holiday?

Oh god @Kelkell - he really is not covering himself in glory, is he? If he's passed out for the day, can you take the time to do something nice for you and the kids. Take them off on a boat trip or to explore a different town or beach?
Or if there's a kid's club where you're staying, can you put them in the club and use the time to get online and make contact with a divorce lawyer and work out your next steps?
Or research flights home if that's an option.
Can you also speak to friends or family IRL? It would be good to have some people to rally round you as soon as you're home.

For the first but not the last time today, "What the fuck is wrong with men?"

My ex always used to try and ruin holidays as well - getting drunk, staying in bed all day, throwing tantrums because I said we couldn't afford to buy whatever ridiculously expensive thing he wanted that year. Took me 10 years to ditch him!

Get your ducks in a row, OP, keep a diary of his behaviour and don't worry, you'll be much happier in the long run.

And if you want to be petty, keep muttering 'moo' and laughing.

Yes, if you can, go home and leave him there.it seems like you don’t have a marriage anymore.

You’re treated how you allow yourself to be treated OP. Take back control. Currently he’s calling all the shots. Do you have money to be able to bring yours and the DCs flights forward and go home? You can just pack and leave him a note and leave him with new bestie. Once home get ahead of the game. Find all financial statements, see a solicitor. If he does received six figure salary, you’ll get enough child support to allow you to afford to keep a roof over your heads in some form. It will all sound scary atm, but the alternative is to remain with him so he has the best of both worlds - living the single life with no real change to his own life. He won’t look after your interests whatsoever, so don’t make the mistake of thinking he won’t screw you and the DCs over. I’ve been there, and once they’ve checked out like this they will focus on only their needs and wants. Good luck OP.

I guess it’s good it’s finally out in the open and you have the opportunity to either work through matters or not. Try to get the most out of the holiday and address it all when you get back.

The internet is really a free for all for any slightly dissatisfied partner isn’t it.

Take his card and book a flight home for you and the kids. Pack your bags and leave when he’s down by the pool later.

Can you imagine saying "I wish you were here" to a woman you're paying to talk to you. How embarrassing for him. I bet it's AI aswell.

God what a prize. He even has to pay women to talk to him. Get rid. Can you see how much this man is not worthy of you at all? He has to pay a woman to talk to him. He has be carried back to your hotel room by a random man.

Divorce him. You'll be much happier. He's clearly on a downward spiral so don't worry about all this money he might earn or these people he'll pay to have the kids. He's selfish destructing. Get yourself and the kids out the way and leave him to it

And it’s at this point, I would leave, with the kids and start to sort things out. Consider what you are able to control about the situation as that will help you remain calm. So sorry this has happened to you. You deserve so much better x