You are welcome to bring your partner

I read it a different way, I read it as partners not compulsory, you can come on your own .. to cover people whose partners don’t want to go or people who would feel awkward on their own.

Exactly this. It implies that whoever wrote it sees 'having an available partner' as the only possible state of being and is completely unaware that there are other entirely normal possibilities.

I hope you are not as awful in real life as you come across here.

You’d say to your friend who you know is a widow “bring your partner”? Really??

Yes widowed people can move on, but unless I knew for certain they had met someone else there is no way I’d use such insensitive wording, and I’m surprised other people would to a friend.

Gosh, how thoughtless are you. Such an unnecessarily mean thing to say.

Yes, do ask. If she objects, she's not much of a friend. Hopefully she'll just apologise for her insensitivity. Don't go on your own if you don't want to!

@JugBouquet and some of us who did lose husbands to cancer, never want to see or hear or read anything to do with any of these cancer charities ever again. So the Bakedpotatoes grandma was trying her best to ensure she didn’t upset people too and cause the least upset possible all round.

Context is important.

Eg if I invite a mixed group of friends round for a barbecue, I might say that those who have partners can bring them too because, why not? But I wouldn't necessarily want those who dont have partners to just bring a random friend with them.

I wouldn't exclude someone because they were single/widowed/divorced though and I was never excluded for being single when I was.

For heaven's sake. If it were a cancer charity, many people whose loved one died from a disease is going to be pleased someone chose something that benefits a charity working to cure a disease or help those living with it. When my uncle died last autumn, my aunt was very pleased by how many Christmas cards she got that benefited the hospice in which he died. People were doing joined up thinking. It's not as though she's going to have forgotten she's just lost her husband, just because it's Christmas!

Oh this is sad to read. I bet your friend inviting meant no offense or upset, but it has upset you all the same.

What would a better wording be?

Sorry for your loss.

I'd also guess that the same generic invitation was sent to everyone. But it's not just poor/thoughtless wording, it actually does make a significant distinction: someone with a partner can bring that partner (but not another guest). Someone without a partner for whatever reason - single, widowed, widower, divorced, casually dating, partner lives elsewhere or away long term - is expected to come alone or perhaps to go back to the host an ask for an exception ("My sister is in staying with me for a few days; would it be OK for me to bring her?")

If this were something formal, like a work or school do, it might be considered unacceptably discriminatory. (Established professional companies have been very careful about wording like this for decades, certainly since the 1980s, typically even taking some trouble to assure employees that "a guest" is welcome.) If it is purely social, then of course it's the host's choice, but the combination of the lack of personalisation - for example, individual people didn't get "Bring Maggie, if she's free - we'd love to see her!", in which case the OP would have had either nothing or "Bring a guest if you'd like" - suggests this isn't a case where they only want certain people there, or want a tight group - no casual dates. It's just thoughtlessness, or an assumption that the entire world is constantly coupled up for life. But it's more than the wording that's an issue here.

What wording would be better OP?

Would “welcome to bring a guest” be better?

Single person and it bugs me! I once replied, I would bring my BF except I don’t have one..if I’m inviting I would say feel free to bring partner/ friend etc..

Well said!! We need more consideration, thoughtfulness and empathy in the world, not less.

People could be a bit more thoughtful. It doesn’t take much for someone to consider other people’s feelings, especially when it’s sensitive such the loss of a husband.

However, I feel I’ve just fallen into a trap and you were just posting nasty, self centred comments because you’re bored.

Well it’s not out if the realms of possibility that you have a partner or boyfriend! Seems like a nice gesture to me.
I’m a widow and like @Alphabet1spaghetti2do not get invited to couple things

If someone you love and deeply care about drops dead, then I really hope people will show you much greater kindness than the words you've written here.

It depends in this case on how recently OP was widowed, surely.
At a certain point, kid gloves need no longer be worn when composing a group invitation such as this (or when referring in company to relationship status in a general way).

I’d always prefer to use ‘feel free to bring “a” partner’ rather than ‘your partner’. Sounds less like having a partner is every person’s default status.

I'm sorry for your loss, OP.

What is the context of the invitation? If it's something pre-printed going to 50 people, it's clearly not meant as any kind of slight. If it's a message in a WhatsApp group with six or seven of you, then yes, the sender should have been more thoughtful.

If you're feeling up to it your could respond "As you know I don't have a partner anymore, do you mind if I bring a friend?"

It's a bit old fashioned and definitely inconsiderate if that was a personal invitation. In my circles it's 'feel free to bring a +1/guest' - but quite a few of us are single.

Was it a group text? It was insensitive when your husband has died, there was no malicious intent.
I would probably let it go if it was a group text and not directly sent to you.

It depends on the context but it sounds like the same invite to everyone via a text so I think its not unreasonable to say it