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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be a bit cheesed off by this window display?

344 replies

Utterlybananas333 · 29/07/2026 23:34

Saw this on the high road today. My daughter asked what it meant bless her. The rest of the display on the other side included cross dressing obscene mannequins who had large breasts and moustaches etc. This was a charity shop that supports homelessness.

To be a bit cheesed off by this window display?
To be a bit cheesed off by this window display?
OP posts:
Kalalily · 31/07/2026 11:03

sillypuss · 31/07/2026 10:52

He is a trans woman and they address him as Miss. They also know he is trans so not an actual woman. Some (a lot of) pupils make fun of him / her and my dc thinks that's not nice. Nonetheless, my dc knows that that this teacher is actually a "he" but respects their wish to be addresses as Miss.

I think it is these kids who will turn this around. It seems to me that the younger kids do not believe in this ideology, unlike those who grew up during Covid. They consider the kids identifying as trans to be autistic and most likely mentally ill.
It was a big trend in secondary schools a few years ago with an unusually high number of kids identifying as trans. That seems to be turning around now but sadly autistic kids have been left behind 😢

sillypuss · 31/07/2026 10:52

TahliaBanania · 30/07/2026 20:37

How do your children address the trans teacher? Do they have to use 'Mr' or 'Mrs' etc?

He is a trans woman and they address him as Miss. They also know he is trans so not an actual woman. Some (a lot of) pupils make fun of him / her and my dc thinks that's not nice. Nonetheless, my dc knows that that this teacher is actually a "he" but respects their wish to be addresses as Miss.

viques · 31/07/2026 10:41

Velvera · 31/07/2026 10:12

That sanctimonious reply definitely belongs in FWR. Especially the 'kool aid' bit.

I think swallowing koolaid is a reasonable analogy for people who accept the lies that have been told to children about changing sex, the effects of hormone treatment on young bodies, the poor results offered by radical surgery to remove healthy body parts, and the damage done to young confused teens who are told that their very real issues of asd, anorexia, bulimia depression and anxiety will be sorted by gender woo. Bit there you go. You do you. I will carry on trying to tell the truth.

Velvera · 31/07/2026 10:12

viques · 31/07/2026 09:57

Balanced or ill informed? My experience is that many people have swallowed the TRA kool aid because it is sweetened with be kind and flavoured with artificial moral glow enhancers and sequins , whereas the biological reality kool aid can be a bit heavy on the serious science stuff which a lot of people find hard to digest.

That sanctimonious reply definitely belongs in FWR. Especially the 'kool aid' bit.

Panda69 · 31/07/2026 10:04

I'd have a chat and explain that you don't like him just turning up,and not to do that.Then you will see if he respects your wishes,and go from there...but if you are not comfortable with the age gap,it would be better for both of you if you call it a day sooner rather than later

viques · 31/07/2026 09:57

Velvera · 30/07/2026 09:26

It's probably better posted here than in the echo chamber that is FWR, Where anyone disagreeing on there is called a TRA ,a troll or a man.

Much more of a balanced opinion in this topic.

Balanced or ill informed? My experience is that many people have swallowed the TRA kool aid because it is sweetened with be kind and flavoured with artificial moral glow enhancers and sequins , whereas the biological reality kool aid can be a bit heavy on the serious science stuff which a lot of people find hard to digest.

Wowthatwasabigstep · 31/07/2026 09:43

LeopardStar1 · 30/07/2026 19:01

The trans people I'm aware of would cringe at this virtue signalling and poorly dressed drag mannequins. It's an insult to the genuine trans people. Trust. The real trans people in my experience (and Id have to quantify what I mean by "real trans" with a definition which I'll do if anyone cares enough but I'll not bore you now) want to blend in with whatever sex they're aiming at transitioning to. So a trans man is going to look at mens clothing, and transwomen, the women's clothing. They don't go out to have tit's and a moustache and some weird pink little red riding hood outfit. They also don't need shops to "support" them. They just want what the rest of us want : decent items sold for a bargain and a real person serving them at the checkout as opposed to a AI self serve.

Interesting…..”the genuine trans people” “real trans” as opposed to what? Is there a hierarchy within the trans world, so not the utopia based on equality it likes to portray itself to be, but a bullying, fractured cult maybe.

Are the ones with the mutilated bodies and shattered lives at the top of the pile, or the ones that “pass” and think they are fooling people the supreme leader 🙄

I have yet to see a man dressing as a woman that fools anybody, normally the ghastly dress sense, the Adam’s Apple, the size of their hands, the deeper voice, strange mannerisms, muscle distribution, size of feet, height…….I could go on.

At the heart of this is the biological fact, a woman is a woman and a man is a man. That cannot be changed.

Kalalily · 31/07/2026 08:58

Goatsarebest · 30/07/2026 23:05

It's to do with them being kicked out of the family household when they come out as Trans.

Actually, from what I hear in my support group for parents of trans kids, the kids themselves mostly initiate the estrangement from their families. They run towards new glitter families where there is no genuine discussion or critical thinking. Reddit posts etc tell trans youth that if their parents don’t affirm them then they want them dead, which is complete nonsense but sadly some autistic kids take this literally.
Estrangement seems to be a trend happening more widely in society where young people seem to have lost any sense of responsibility and are cutting off their families.
Be in no doubt that the mums and dads keep the door wide open for these kids and very much welcome any contact from their estranged child.
Sadly, homelessness is strongly linked to mental illness.

InconvenientlyMaterial · 31/07/2026 08:57

A side issue, but us mammals not being able to accurately determine the sex of another human is so rare (amongst women at least - suspect it is about safety as well as reproduction) and yet people claim it so often on MN! It's fascinating. Of those that claim it who are a) being truthful and b) women, I'd be (genuinely) interested in whether there are co- morbidities with anything else?

For example I have a friend who is almost entirely face - blind. They can't recognise people they know outside of context. They are also highly intelligent, and very dyslexic.

SapphireSeptember · 31/07/2026 08:38

RunsABit · 30/07/2026 21:31

Exactly this.

And chiming in to at least attempt to educate/ inform/ enlighten the genuinely unknowing/ stubbornly ignorant/ captured gullibles/ aggressive apologists/ utterly lost, this:

Do not conflate LGB with the TQ+ alphabet nonsense.

LGB is sexuality, TQ+ is ideology. One is proven scientific fact, the other is a dangerous obfuscation built on misogyny, fetishism and delusion.

They are not and never will be the same.

And for the hard of reading:

LGB without the T. Or Q. Or +

Edited for typo

Edited

This. I wouldn't care if DS came to me when he's older and told me he fancies boys. I would be very concerned if he said he wants to be a girl and change his name to Claire or something.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 31/07/2026 08:32

OwlBeThere · 30/07/2026 23:03

that doesn’t change the fact that some ciswomen have breast and facial hair. so it’s only obscene if it’s a trans person,…and how do you know if it is a trans person or not by looking? you could easily be looking at a ciswoman and thinking she is obscene.

The word "ciswoman" is obscene.
Hmm

dinodart · 31/07/2026 05:27

"biology was never binary" with a drawing of... is that a woman with mastectomy scars? so... they are saying sex isn't binary, with a pic of a woman with her breasts cut off made to look like... a man? that's rather, binary... it's rather as if, there are two sexes.

lifeinthelastlane · 31/07/2026 01:34

Among the middle aged men who make up a lot of transpeople, I'd assume they move out when they come out - I suppose you could say a wife "threw them out" but it would be a deal breaker for many marriages.

Goatsarebest · 30/07/2026 23:05

Motnight · 30/07/2026 04:37

I didn't realise this. I wonder if it's connected to mental health issues, would be good to see the research behind this statement.

It's to do with them being kicked out of the family household when they come out as Trans.

OwlBeThere · 30/07/2026 23:03

lifeinthelastlane · 30/07/2026 15:51

By the sign saying "protect trans youth", perhaps?

that doesn’t change the fact that some ciswomen have breast and facial hair. so it’s only obscene if it’s a trans person,…and how do you know if it is a trans person or not by looking? you could easily be looking at a ciswoman and thinking she is obscene.

SALaw · 30/07/2026 22:36

LeopardStar1 · 30/07/2026 22:23

Erm..... They are...... Blaire White.

Name another

LeopardStar1 · 30/07/2026 22:23

SALaw · 30/07/2026 20:01

Where’s the backlash against those people, that seem to shout loudest? If a reasonable person is walking alongside someone in bondage gear with a “Gas Terfs” or whatever sign, why aren’t they saying “hang on you are making life considerably harder for me and I don’t support you”?

Erm..... They are...... Blaire White.

RunsABit · 30/07/2026 21:58

LeopardStar1 · 30/07/2026 19:01

The trans people I'm aware of would cringe at this virtue signalling and poorly dressed drag mannequins. It's an insult to the genuine trans people. Trust. The real trans people in my experience (and Id have to quantify what I mean by "real trans" with a definition which I'll do if anyone cares enough but I'll not bore you now) want to blend in with whatever sex they're aiming at transitioning to. So a trans man is going to look at mens clothing, and transwomen, the women's clothing. They don't go out to have tit's and a moustache and some weird pink little red riding hood outfit. They also don't need shops to "support" them. They just want what the rest of us want : decent items sold for a bargain and a real person serving them at the checkout as opposed to a AI self serve.

Go on then - quantify it.

Educate all we bigoted, violent, genocide-inducing TERFs.

Don't worry about boring us, we love to pore over well evidenced peer-reviewed citations to help us become educated handmaidens.

I don't doubt that there are some - a minute few - who suffer from a mental illness that induces genuine genderdysphoria. It sounds as if you know a considerable amount of these individuals; it will be refreshing and helpful to those of us who are hard-wired evil 'cis' women to hear their plea.

Go.

DropEmOut · 30/07/2026 21:33

Aco8171 · 29/07/2026 23:42

What an excellent opportunity to teach your daughter about the world and inclusivity and how we are all different etc, I can only assume you didn’t take this opportunity given your post.

👏🙌👏🙌👏🙌

RunsABit · 30/07/2026 21:31

AskingQuestionsAllTheTime · 30/07/2026 18:26

GerryPix
Will you be "cheesed off" if your child grows up and realises they are part of the LGBTQ+ movement ?

I think "cheesed off" would almost certainly be a massive understatement if her daughter decided to chop off her breasts and take health-threatening hormones in order to try superficially to resemble a man. I think "devastated" would be more likely. Possibly "horrified".

Edited

Exactly this.

And chiming in to at least attempt to educate/ inform/ enlighten the genuinely unknowing/ stubbornly ignorant/ captured gullibles/ aggressive apologists/ utterly lost, this:

Do not conflate LGB with the TQ+ alphabet nonsense.

LGB is sexuality, TQ+ is ideology. One is proven scientific fact, the other is a dangerous obfuscation built on misogyny, fetishism and delusion.

They are not and never will be the same.

And for the hard of reading:

LGB without the T. Or Q. Or +

Edited for typo

ImogenBrocklehurst · 30/07/2026 21:06

Why “bless her”? She asked a question. Don’t children usually ask questions? As @Aco8171 said: an opportunity for you to explain the concept of accepting diversity.

SapphireSeptember · 30/07/2026 20:48

grasschunks · 30/07/2026 20:38

It is absolutely.

Those unborn girls did not identify as female, they just were female.

Indeed. We cannot identify out of our biology.

Hallamlass · 30/07/2026 20:40

TahliaBanania · 30/07/2026 20:37

How do your children address the trans teacher? Do they have to use 'Mr' or 'Mrs' etc?

Where I work they have to use the preferred pronouns. So the teacher I work with is known as Ms X.
Students do get into trouble for misgendering.

grasschunks · 30/07/2026 20:38

SapphireSeptember · 30/07/2026 20:19

That's horrific. That makes me feel so sad.

It is absolutely.

Those unborn girls did not identify as female, they just were female.

TahliaBanania · 30/07/2026 20:37

sillypuss · 30/07/2026 17:59

Careful, cultural appropriation! Anyhow, most women have hairy legs and some have broad shouldered so that in itself is no explanation of anything.

The shop sign is supposed to convey that there aren't two sexes, which is of course magical thinking.

Tell your dd that "some people with mental health issues feel uncomfortable with being a woman or a man and feel more at ease presenting with what they believe the opposite sex presents as. Much of it is based on dumb stereotypes and sexism but that is how they wish to present as. I recommend we treat such people with the same basic respect as anyone else, such as the elderly, disabled, your neighbour down the street, shop assistant at Aldi, but we as a family don't believe in such stuff, as it is not factual."

That's what I did with mine and they are polite to the occasional trans person they come across e.g. teacher at school but they are completely gender critical. They don't buy any of that stuff nor do any of their peers.

How do your children address the trans teacher? Do they have to use 'Mr' or 'Mrs' etc?