Am I being too pushy with daughters swimming?

Sounds like shes doing well.

Just make sure she knows all the safety rules as well. Its easy to think you are safe as you can swim a bit.

Your kid is doing really well. My 5yo is just at about 10 metres and I thought she was doing well. My 9yo is dyspraxic and has really struggled: currently at about 20’metrws.

its a life skill: 25 metres makes her safe if she fell into water or soemthing, but if she enjoyed it I’d keep her going all the way through primary to get much stronger and more competent

She’s done brilliantly swimming 25m at age 4

Learning to be a competent swimmer for life saving skills purposes and competing are two wildly different things

if she was competing she would be up at 5 am daily. You’re just sending her to normal swimming lessons

i actually tell my kids swimming lessons until stage 5/6 are part of compulsory education and I’d get fined if they miss them

Yeah I’d let that one wash over your head!

However ….. if your DD genuinely loves swimming it’s worthwhile looking at local clubs and what age they take kids from and their learn to swim programme and their progression of lessons through academy to squad.

Mu ds absolutely loved his 1 lesson a week at that age and decided to join a club when he was a bit older.

He still trains 9 times a week at 21!!! Swimming is a huge passion for him.

No but if her daughter enjoys it there’s every need to keep going to improve her skills. 25 metres is easily enough to keep her safe in water

Enough for it to be a life skill, no need to have more necessarily.

I generally agree with your mother in law with pushing young children to do loads of clubs and activities, but I think swimming is very different. I think every child should be taught to swim at an early age - it’s an essential life skill.

Teaching kids to swim is such an important life skill - especially if it also develops a love of water. I swam up to my mid teens and in my 40’s did a cross Channel relay swim. I took both DC to weekly swimming lessons for years. DS (16) is now a qualified lifeguard and both he and DD (14) are certified scuba divers. Being confident in the water has opened up so many brilliant experiences and opportunities for all of us. Your DD sounds like she enjoys it - no reason to stop her enjoying an activity because your in laws have a bit of a warped view!

They voiced an opinion you don't agree with. You weren't even there. DH could have just kept it to himself. I really wouldn't worry about what they think. You're doing what's right for your child and other people's opinions aren't important.

i don't think swimming twice a week is being "pushy" .Its great exercise and a good life skill.
My kids were competitive swimmers so i do understand that can lead to "pushy".

Agreed, we did waterbabies from 1.5 and she's continued first with the swim programme and now more locally. Once a week lesson with occasional practice unless on holiday. Current ambition: mermaid. (But I don't think could swim 25m of a recognisable stroke yet, well done to your daughter!)

Well done for giving your DD a life skill which will hopefully give her pleasure for decades to come. No right minded person would criticise you for that.

So did you tell them it was learning swimming skills and not competing? Simple misunderstanding, simple solution.

Thank you so much for taking on the swimming pool alphas 😄! I wish you were at my local pool!

Do they still get badges to sew onto their towel?

Or is that a thing of the past?

Oh love - it’s about them, not you. They didn’t do this with their own children, and are justifying to themselves why not. Doing swim stages in early primary school is an excellent thing to do for all sorts of reasons. And 25m at 5 is great! Go Mini-Tiger!

I swam competitively and definitely went to many more sessions a week. I could swim early too and what a blessing it has been. I am sure your in-laws never got near to my level and can’t now dive in the fast lane (looking let’s face it pale and fat) and lap the alpha young guns who are training for their triathlon. They have the pretty muscles but I identify as half fish and love it! Your daughter sounds like she is doing brilliantly and deserves a grandparent that says well done!

Yanbu - what your dd does is perfectly normal! Every child I know does a weekly swimming lesson. If you were up at 5am every day getting her to do drills then maybe your mil would have a point.

Oh my word please take no notice of your MIL! Sounds like dh was just humouring her.

Stage 4 at age 4 is really good. My ds is 7.5 and just moving up to stage 6 and I thought he was doing quite well! Your dd sounds great. I’d be super proud in your shoes, not trying to hold her back because MIL has some quaint notion that it’s “not the done thing” to be successful.

Honestly just keep doing what you’re doing. At some point you might be asked is your dd wants to join a swim development squad but it won’t be until she gets through the other stages.

If MIL mentions it again? I’d just do the tinkly laugh and say, “oh don’t be silly MiL she’s only four, we haven’t got her signed up to GB national squad!” And under the table silently raise a middle finger at her.

It isn't a competition. It is a life skill. A hugely important one for safety. I told DD she could pick and choose any other hobby, never needed to compete if she didn't want to and could stop any of them if she wasn't enjoying it any more. Except swimming because of the safety aspect. As for the certificate, kids love being motivated by a certificate. Absolutely not a problem.

She's doing fabulously well for someone so young but as you say it's a non negotiable life skill.

Keep going and hopefully she'll keep enjoying it.

My two water babies are now lifeguards and swim teachers earning double their friends in minimum wage jobs elsewhere.