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Original poster

Best friend has made an issue about my DH’s joke over dinner

240 replies

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:13

We met friends (another couple) at an Indian restaurant last night. My friend ordered a particularly hot curry which we remarked on. DH made a joke along the lines of ‘that’s the face-sitting off the cards tonight’ to which we both laughed as did my friends husband.

Driving home, I could see she messaged me. I got back to read it and she said she thought DH had set out to humiliate her and she expects an apology.

Is it me or has she gone very OTT here?!

OP posts:
bettyrubble99 · 29/07/2026 18:44

Does he not know how to conduct himself in a public place or something? He sounds juvenile and crass.

Knittedfairies2 · 29/07/2026 18:43

Team Friend here.

Robogob · 29/07/2026 18:43

Grim. I’d get the ick.

Datafan55 · 29/07/2026 18:42

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:37

I’d laugh again - there’s too much uptightness in this world (or is that just on MN!)

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Having standards isn't 'being uptight'.

Hohofortherobbers · 29/07/2026 18:42

There's not a single one of my friends who would make such a vulgar joke. Your husband should apologise

TokyoSushi · 29/07/2026 18:41

Yep, really grim.

Flamingojune · 29/07/2026 18:40

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:37

I’d laugh again - there’s too much uptightness in this world (or is that just on MN!)

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So why ask if yabu

Besidemyselfwithworry · 29/07/2026 18:40

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:32

DH is in the trades so to speak and was brought up on a tough old estate so his language can be more industrial than normal, but I didn’t see how I am responsible for the comment.

He sounds a right catch - not
someone so foul mouthed ofcourse it’s going to reflect on you!!!!!

Blimms · 29/07/2026 18:40

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:37

I’d laugh again - there’s too much uptightness in this world (or is that just on MN!)

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You have very low standards, OP. Many of us prefer our DH’s to have more class.

Waitingfordoggo · 29/07/2026 18:39

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:37

I’d laugh again - there’s too much uptightness in this world (or is that just on MN!)

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We’re all different. If my DH said that to my friend, I’d be really embarrassed.

Funchythesnowwoman · 29/07/2026 18:38

Not uptight at all. Just full of sympathy for that woman having to endure the company of brain dead fools.

OrangeFlower14 · 29/07/2026 18:38

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:32

DH is in the trades so to speak and was brought up on a tough old estate so his language can be more industrial than normal, but I didn’t see how I am responsible for the comment.

Agree, you are not responsible

She probably felt more comfortable messaging you than messaging him if she even has his number

The trade thing is ridiculous plenty of men in the trades are lovely

Cora0 · 29/07/2026 18:37

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:32

DH is in the trades so to speak and was brought up on a tough old estate so his language can be more industrial than normal, but I didn’t see how I am responsible for the comment.

Presumably because she’s best friends with you, not him. She probably wants an apology from both since you laughed at the disrespectful comment. And I’d guess that the other reason she’s telling you is because she will distance herself from the friendship if you try to make light of it.

ginasevern · 29/07/2026 18:37

Nah, maybe the age old joke about putting a toilet roll in the fridge overnight or something like that. And even then it depends on how well he knows your friend and the general relationship between all of you. But to bring her vagina and a sex act into it is way overstepping to say the very least. I live on a council estate and know a lot of blokes in trades and this is not normal or standard.

Jerrybalanitis · 29/07/2026 18:37

And this is why we stillncan't walk past a building site without being abused. Grow up.

Besidemyselfwithworry · 29/07/2026 18:37

PensionPTake · 29/07/2026 18:15

It's quite a personal joke to make. I don't think I'd appreciate it much either.

I agree it’s really vulgar does he usually act so rudely ?

Waitingfordoggo · 29/07/2026 18:37

Ewww, I wouldn’t like that. I probably would have addressed it at the time though rather than sending a text about it later.

OrangeFlower14 · 29/07/2026 18:37

TheresMillionsOfGeoffreys · 29/07/2026 18:29

Ew, why is his first thought, when hearing about a woman eating food, to analyse the details of her vagina?

That's weird.

Can he explain why he not only thought of her vagina but wanted everyone else to?

Hopefully the friend asked him that question

lovelycattus · 29/07/2026 18:37

I don’t know why you laughed ? I wouldn’t. I’d be repulsed. She probably laughed out of nerves. I think you need to apologise for laughing quite apart from your husband.

Original poster
Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:37

Funchythesnowwoman · 29/07/2026 18:36

You laughed. You’re as bad as he is.
As is her husband.

I’d laugh again - there’s too much uptightness in this world (or is that just on MN!)

OP posts:
RampantIvy · 29/07/2026 18:36

Berniewe · 29/07/2026 18:32

DH is in the trades so to speak and was brought up on a tough old estate so his language can be more industrial than normal, but I didn’t see how I am responsible for the comment.

So, he thinks it is appropriate to make this kind of remark?

DH grew up in a poor family in a council house but doesn't make puerile remarks like this.

Your husband sounds like an immature oik.

TheJoyousHiker · 29/07/2026 18:36

You’re not responsible for the comment but you did laugh, as did her own DH. Personally, I’d have been mortified if my DH had made such a joke. Doesn’t matter that your DH works in the trades or not.

socks1107 · 29/07/2026 18:36

Inappropriate and I’d be offended too. Why on earth was that funny?

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 29/07/2026 18:36

He can say sorry , I wasn't intending to offend, I missed the mark. No big deal.

Funchythesnowwoman · 29/07/2026 18:36

You laughed. You’re as bad as he is.
As is her husband.