AIBU to think that a stranger collecting a baby from a nursery is a massive safeguarding issue?

My Aunt once went to pick up DS from nursery. She went to the door of his room and said she was Joseph's Auntie and the person in charge said here's Joseph, but it was a different little blonde Joseph! They'd switched rooms since my Aunt had last been in with me, and there were 2 Josephs, one in each room. In this case both sides immediately knew it was the wrong child, so just an amusing anecdote, but can see how this happens.

FWIW I'm terrible at recognising people and often wonder if I have the face blindness mentioned above. My Dad was similar and I could just about imagine him confusing 2 similar looking young children. But there clearly should be better procedures in place, particularly for very young children who can't articulate.

This actually happened to my cousin's child . Grandfather picked up the wrong child from school. Little blond girl in school uniform. He said Granny said to pick you up today . Child went with him in the car . Got home , grandmother was horrified. Straight back to school where chaos was erupting . My cousin's husband nearly attacked him . Years later he still resented the man now long dead .

Just mistaken old man nothing else sinister .

The first time I collected my child from nursery I had a big fear of not recognizing my child (I hadn’t really seen him alongside other babies before). Obviously when it came to it, I knew my child and it was a fear built on nothing but going in to it I was like I know my child but does he actually just look the same as other babies or does he look distinct.

Exactly, this is a disgraceful action on the nursery's part, but hardly that unlikely on the Grandfathers part.
I'd be using my energy on getting the nursery and staff forced to improve rather than casting aspersions on some random man who was a victim of their uselessness.

I realise how impossible it must seem to parents, but I couldn't easily tell two vaguely similar toddlers apart - especially if they weren't next to each other for comparison, which they wouldn't have been,

The nursery staff, obviously, should be able to identify each child correctly.

I'm sure the relevant authorities have spoken to the man and advised him to not speak to the family.

The police were obviously reassured after interviewing him.
BThere's no knowing how the family would react on speaking to him.
Would they film him and plaster him all over SM too?

So many people here making excuses for a man being so useless.

Then that is another failure of the nursery's procedures. I have 4 DGC and at every nursery the staff bring the child (even to parents) at pick up.

Just because you want something to be a crime doesn’t make it one. Child abduction needs an intent. He needs to have used force or fraud to take the child. He took the wrong one and returned it when he realised. Yes that shows incompetence on his part and the nursery needs investigating by local authority but it doesn’t make it a crime. You need criminal intent and this appears to be a genuine mistake.

I agree @willitevergetwarmpeople are making massive jumps here as is always the case on MN. This man was permitted to collect a different child so if his intentions were grim that's putting the other child at risk every day. Are people really suggesting that all parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, older siblings who collect their family are to be assumed to be paedophiles? What about all the people who don't send children to nursery, are they assumed to be too? How far do we take this assumption, are expectant Dads red flags too? The wrong child was handed to this man by all accounts, he didn't seek to take a different child.

The nursery absolutely should make more effort to ensure children are collected by the right person but to me I don’t think it sounds like anything nefarious. Some men are rubbish at distinguishing vaguely similar children from each other. I can well imagine my dad being asked to pick up a grandchild and returning home with the wrong one. I would almost put money on the 15 minutes it took to return her being because the grandad took the child to his house where the grandma immediately realised it wasn’t their grandchild and frantically sent him to return the child and bring back the correct one!

That has no relevance because the organisation who permitted him to do that are responsible

Because it isn't doh !

he had no intention of taking the wrong chid, and the grandfather had no ill intentions did not harm the child and brought her straight back

to meet the threshold for child abduction there needs to be intentional actions , deception, bad intentions lies , fraud deprivation of custody harm etc travelling across country putting the childs basic needs at risk etc etc

There is no crime "criminal negligence"...negligence may contribute toward the conduct of a crime...but what would that specific crime be in this case??
There may be H&S failures, safeguarding failures ...but highly unlikely anything amounting to a crime

I'd also be concerned with how little Grandad knew his own grandchild, bearing in mind there was another little child waiting there for this man who was little more than a stranger. I know sometimes family members pick up in an emergency but surely they would know the child. It makes you wonder if the man had dementia or something and shouldn't be minding a child at all.

My first reaction is this is a serious breach of policy but at the same time innocent mistakes can happen. They still need to be treated very seriously and the whole system revised, but it can still happen.

Grandfather picked his own grandchild up every day so you would think he could recognise the child he was holding wasn't his own grandchild.
Child was awake and was referred to by name by nursery worker.
You've no idea what this man did or didn't do while he had the child.

Criminal negligence like not exercising the appropriate duty of care to a child under the care of the nursery absolute can and does result in prosecution, making it a crime.
As for what specific crimes took place for this negligence to occur, an investigation will uncover that.
But doing absolutely no safely checks before handing a child over to an adult absolutely is negligent on the nursery’s part, and completely unacceptable.

You are being extremely patronising to the OP. People post here about news stories all the time. Why are you so upset that the OP is doing this here? I would be properly Mumsnet ‘fuming’ if my toddler (and I have teens and pre-teens now) were handed to another family. I can only imagine the trauma for all involved.

OP, how has the nursery workers mistake led you to belive and plaster all over the internet that Grandad is a paedophile?

He is clearly trusted by the child's parents to collect from nursery. He got given the wrong child, he didn't take the child out of a group of children, perhaps the child looked similar to his grandchild - you don't know.

He took the child back and for that, in your eyes, he's a paedophile. Do you think that your DC's grandad is a paedophile for collecting them from school/nursery?

Nursery are the only ones at fault here and their whole collection system needs looking at urgently.

@Peterrabbity the only agencies that should be investigating beyond the actual nursery are Ofsted and Social Services to ensure that safeguarding practices are tightened to protect all children

Of course he's not guilty of anything, other than not immediately realising the child he was given by nursery staff was not the right one, as said that little girl may look very like his GD and or he may not see her very often and or he may have poor eye sight. What do you think he did in that 15 minutes? I assume child came back fully clothed and uninjured or the police would be interested. Do you think the GF is a very fast working, while leaving no clues, closet paedophile rather than a loving GF doing his son/daughter a favour picking up his GD from nursery.